Before the Fall (Season One)
by Jet Engine
Summary: (GF spin-off. Takes place inside the portal.) Ford didn't know what to expect when he woke up in another dimension. Now, with the help of some new friends, he must find a way back to his own world. But, dark forces are lying in wait, and soon traveling through strange dimensions with two dream demons and a pretty mutant becomes the least of Ford's problems.
1. Prologue

**I can't be the only one who wants to know what happened to Ford in the portal, so I'm writing about what I think happened!**

 **This is a fan-made _Gravity Falls_ spin-off/prequel, so it will be organized like _Gravity Falls_. In other words, there will important episodes, filler episodes, and everything in between. It will also probably be darkly-themed in some episodes. Enjoy!**

* * *

 **Prologue**

Everything had started out great. Stanford Pines had discovered some amazing creatures and learned a lot about the mysterious happenings in the "sleepy town" of Gravity Falls, Oregon. He had been recorded it all in a series of journals and was about halfway through his third one.

That was when things started going south.

In his investigations, he had stumbled upon an incantation on the wall of a cave and read it (despite the warning not to). Later, a demon named Bill Cipher appeared to him in a dream. Bill said that he could complete his research by creating a gateway between Earth and the dimension where all the anomalies were coming from. Little did he know that Bill wanted the portal for something much more sinister. What that something was, Ford wasn't entirely certain, but one thing was clear: the portal had to be shut down.

Ford also hid his journals, fearing what would happen if Bill got his hands on them. One was buried in the forest. One had been given to Ford's friend and research partner, Fiddleford McGucket, for safe-keeping. The other was going to be entrusted to Ford's twin brother, Stanley. Well... _was_ …

Ford tried to explain how dire the situation was, but Stan just wouldn't listen! Sure, Stan may been through a few rough patches - and he may have had a mullet - but at least _he_ hadn't been tricked into building a portal that could spell disaster!

Somehow, the brothers had ended up in a fight. Not an argument, but a physical _fight_. Stanley seemed to think that burning the journal would be the solution to Ford's problem. Ford thought differently. No, that's not it. Ford didn't know _what_ he was thinking. He knew what the journals were capable of, but all he could focus on was saving his _precious_ research.

Oh, what a fool he had been!

In their quarrel, they had accidentally reactivated the portal. Ford soon found himself floating, and panic crashed into him, as he realized what was happening. As he drew dangerously close to the harsh white light, he subconsciously threw the journal to his brother, hoping Stan would have the sense to hide it as far away as possible.

* * *

She liked this dimension. It was so quiet, so peaceful; the locals said there hadn't been any war here in over three hundred years. Everyone was friendly, and - aside from the occasional robbery or animal attack - the emphasis they put on law enforcement seemed like a waste of resources. The police force was made up of _volunteers_ , for Hades' sake! She wished she could stay here forever. Despite all of the people and animals having a distinct lacking in faces, which was unnerving, she wished that she could stay here forever.

Maybe, she could?

She lay down in the grass and stared up at the pastel clouds, trying to imagine spending the remainder of her days here. For once in her life, she would live peacefully, maybe even start a family (assuming she was capable of conceiving with the men of this dimension). She would work as an artist, painting and decorating buildings, making sculptures and pots, and selling her works for the people to enjoy. Or, perhaps she could work in the school as an art teacher, educating the youth on the wonders of creativity and imagination.

She sighed in contentment at the thought. Maybe her friends would stay too, and they would all live happily in this wonderful dimension. She raised her hand to her face, trailing her fingers over the stitches on her cheek, shivering as she recalled how she came to receive such a scar (and similar scars on the rest of her body). No one would hurt her here. Everyone was too kindly to cause such abuse.

A sudden scream jolted her into a sitting position. She looked around frantically. Someone was in trouble. She could hear fear in the voice. Her eyes caught sight of a circular white light high up in the orange sky, not far from where she and her friends had made camp. Another rift? Maybe, but natural rifts didn't have a definite shape like this one. A synthetic rift, perhaps?

Whatever the case, there was something falling near it. No, not something… It seemed to be flailing… It was alive! She bolted to her feet and sprinted toward it. She paused when she heard loud _thud_ , then she continued running in the direction of the sound.

A sharp inhale brought air to her lungs, when she found the most likely source of the noise. There was a creature lying on the ground in beside a tree. She had never seen a creature like this one before. Its skin had a pinkish-hue, its hair was brown and messy, and it had six fingers on each hand. It was unconscious or - assuming it had fallen from such a height and smacked into the tree - possibly dead. Its glasses were broken, and bits of glass from them opened wounds all over its face. Red liquid - that she could only assume was the color of this creature's blood - drenched its face, and it appeared to be leaking from the back of its head too, probably from hitting the tree so hard. Its side also seemed to be bleeding, as its white shirt was torn and had a spreading red stain on it. One of its arms was bent at an angle that didn't look natural for _any_ species. The rest of its body wasn't much better.

 _Poor thing must have rolled down the hill when it fell…_ she concluded, shuddering as she glanced up at the large hill nearby. _I hope it at least lost consciousness_ before _it_ _was in any real pain._

Panicked at the thought of the creature dying in such a terrible way, she knelt down beside it, pushed her tangled hair out of the way, and leaned her ear toward its mouth. She nearly fainted in relief, when she heard it breathing. Shallowly, but breathing. There was still hope!

Not caring what her friends would say about her helping an unknown creature (again), she pressed her hands against the back of its head, knowing that head injuries were often more fatal than others, and let her power do the rest.

* * *

 **Well, there's my prologue! Also, I've posted some episode ideas for this on my profile, if you're interested. If a name doesn't sound familiar, it's most likely an OC that'll be introduced in the first chapter. Until next time, review!**


	2. Trust No One (Part One)

**Summary: After falling into another dimension, Ford is rescued by a kindly mutant. Having no one else to turn to, he is forced to trust her. But, that doesn't mean he trusts the two dream demons that she's been traveling with.**

 **Yay! The first episode...which is being broken into two parts, because it was getting so long. This is probably going to happen a lot. Also, any codes can be translated with the Caesar Cipher unless stated otherwise.**

* * *

 **Chapter One: Trust No One (Part One)**

When Ford woke up, the first thing he registered was how sore his...everything was. The second thing he registered was that, wherever he was, he certainly wasn't at his house. His muscles screamed in protest, as he sat up with a groan. He scanned his surroundings. The area was about the size of his living room (which wasn't very big), and it seemed to be the only room. The walls were cream-colored, and he could tell they were composed of the same material as a tent. The bed he was sitting on was barely bigger than his couch but was comfortable enough. There was smoke coming from the middle of the room, probably leftover from a campfire or something like one. There was a backpack sitting in the corner, obviously filled. Ford scratched his head in confusion. Where was he, and how did he get here?

Then, he remembered. The fight with Stanley, the portal getting turned on in the process, Ford being sucked into said portal. So, he was in another dimension? Ford shuddered. He remembered how terrified he had been, when he arrived on the other side of the vortex, falling from a dangerous height. He had blacked out the moment his body made contact with the hard ground.

He knew he should have been panicking about potentially being in an unfamiliar dimension, but he was too confused about his lack of injuries. Sure, he was pretty sore, and he certainly wasn't complaining, but _why_? Why had he sustained no visible injuries? A fall from _that_ height? He should have _at the very least_ had a concussion. He checked over his body. He tested each of his limbs, fingers, and toes; they all worked fine, though one arm was stiffer than the other. He pulled up his understandably torn pant-legs; not a new mark on either leg. He lifted up the navy blue hoodie he had somehow obtained (he would wonder about that later) and checked his torso; nothing there, either. His arms looked okay, too. He took off his glasses - how had those stayed in tact? - and ran a hand over his face; still _nothing_. There was nothing on his skin but the old scars he'd obtained from researching the paranormal in Gravity Falls.

He put his glasses back on and sighed. This didn't make any sense. Of course, if this was another dimension, maybe it wasn't supposed to make sense.

Deciding that sitting there wasn't going to do him any good, he tentatively got off the bed. After briefly shifting his weight on both legs, testing whether or not he could hold himself up, he cautiously walked out of the tent, not sure what would be waiting for him out there.

It seemed surprisingly peaceful and Earth-like.

The terrain was grassy and level, with only a few trees, A few bushes, and a tall hill breaking the surface. Ford jumped at a sudden noise, only to feel stupid when it turned out to be a bird singing. Really, the only signs that he wasn't still on Earth were the orange sky and pastel-colored clouds. Not wishing to take any chances, he reached for the crossbow hidden in his coat…

...Only to remember that he was no longer _wearing_ his coat.

Ford glanced behind him at the tent's entrance. Were his coat and crossbow in there? Was it a good idea to go back in and check? This dimension didn't appear dangerous.

Then, another thought struck him. Fiddleford had been sucked halfway through the portal before and, ever since, seemed to be slowly driving himself mad trying to forget about what was on the other side. But, why? This dimension didn't seem all that terrifying. Maybe Fiddleford had seen another dimension? Or, maybe this dimension wasn't nearly as peaceful as it appeared. The latter thought set Ford on edge.

A sound broke him from his musing. He instinctively reached for his crossbow - it wasn't _there_ , dammit! - then settled for bracing himself for a fight. He relaxed slightly, when a small brown rabbit hopped out of a bush, looking away from him. Ford remained wary, however; this _was_ another dimension, after all. He took a cautious step toward it for a closer look. The rabbit turned its head. Ford immediately stepped back in shock.

The rabbit had no face.

Ford would have been horrified, if he hadn't seen weirder things in his life.

The rabbit tilted its head, as though it could see him. Hell, maybe it could. It hopped toward him. Everything about it screamed "normal Earthen rabbit" except its lack of face. It stopped at his feet and maybe-sniffed him. It tilted its head up toward his face. Now, Ford was certain it could see him. They stared at each other for a moment, unsure what to make of one another. Knowing that he was tempting fate, Ford carefully knelt down and placed a hand on the rabbit's head, slowly petting it, surprised at how smooth and marble-like its pelt was. The rabbit responded by snuggling closer to Ford's boot. Ford couldn't stop himself from smiling. This rabbit wasn't nearly as skittish as the ones on Earth. If he had to be unarmed around any strange creatures, he was glad it was this one.

"Wkhb'uh iulhqgob olwwoh jxbv, duhq'w wkhb?"

The unfamiliar voice shot Ford to his feet, making the rabbit jump back in surprise. A woman was standing a short distance from him, smiling, and he cursed himself for not noticing her sooner. She was pretty and looked human enough, but her dark gray skin had Ford trying to decypher what exactly she was. She had wild jet-black hair that reached her shoulders and a long scar on her cheek. She was a rather petite woman and wore a grass-stained white kimono-like top, light blue jeans, and muddy sneakers.

The rabbit hopped over to her, and she picked it up and held it against her small breast. It snuggled into her as she ran her fingers over it. She moved her eyes from the rabbit to him. "Krz duh brx ihholqj?" Ford just stared at her. She giggled, and he tried to ignore how cute she sounded. "Sorry. The universal language, then?"

English was universal? Ford made a mental note of that. "Uh, I guess."

The woman nodded. "I said, 'How are you feeling?'"

Ford raised an eyebrow. "Why do you care?"

She let the rabbit hop out of her arms. It remained seated by her feet. "I brought you into our tent." She frowned in concern. "You literally fell out of the sky. You're pretty lucky I found you when I did."

So, he _was_ injured, then? At least that much made sense. "So, you're saying that you treated my injuries?" She nodded with a small, shy smile. "Any particular reason?"

The woman just shrugged. "You were bleeding out." Her casual tone made it seem like they were discussing the weather. "I couldn't just leave you there. I used my power to heal you, and my friends fixed your glasses and gave you some new clothes. Your old ones were pretty torn up."

"You have healing abilities?"

"Yeah, and my friends can conjure objects." The woman face-palmed. "Silly me. I haven't even told you my name." She stepped toward him and held out her hand. She was only as tall as Ford's chin. "I'm Nadia."

Ford hesitantly shook her four-fingered hand, deciding that she was telling the truth and didn't mean him any harm. Plus, the more information he could get out of her, the better. "I, uh, I'm Ford. Now, maybe you can answer some questions for me. First of all, you said something about having friends with you, correct?" She nodded. "Well, then where exactly are they?" He needed to know what all he was dealing with.

Nadia shrugged. "Dunno. Probably scoping out the locals' minds."

Ford's blood turned to ice. "I-I beg your pardon?"

"Well, they thought this place seemed _too_ peaceful, so they went to find some locals and enter their minds to make sure this dimension isn't too good to be true. They've been gone for a while. They should be back soon." Suddenly, all the colorful scenery around them turned gray. "Oh, that must be them."

Ford's heart rate went into overdrive. Her friends arrived like _this_? This was how _Bill_ sometimes made appearances! Was Nadia friends with Bill? A tiny mint-green light appeared above them, and terror washed over Ford, as the light began to form a triangle. But, then it moved in a different shape, drawing a five-pointed star in the sky. The shape glowed white for a moment, then the light dissolved into a wash of blinding glitter. A creature appeared. It was star-shaped and a had one eye in the middle of its small, burnt-orange body. It had stick-like arms and legs and looked more like Bill than Ford was comfortable with. Color returned to the background.

"Guess who's back?" It's voice was feminine, so Ford assumed it was a female. It was speaking to Nadia. "I wanted to make as big an entrance as possible. Why? I don't know. I just felt like it."

Another creature appeared beside it in a spray of harsh glitter. This one was a blue square with two eyes and stick-like arms and legs. It seemed annoyed. "Starclops, don't you think that's unnecessary?" It's voice was deep, like a male's. It pointed at Ford, who suddenly felt ready to pass out again. "Also, I think you're freaking that guy out."

The female being - Starclops - spun around to face Ford. "Whoops. Didn't see you there, pal. Nice to see you woke up, though."

Ford took a subconscious step back. This was a dream. This _had_ to be nothing more than a bad dream.

Starclops flew around him in a circle. "Yeesh, man. You sure are jumpy. Must be a species-thing."

Nadia glared at her. "He's jumpy, because you're obviously scaring him."

The square crossed his arms. "Seriously, Star. Knock it off."

Ford forced himself to breathe, and after a better look at the two dream demons-

Oh, god.

Oh, freaking _god_!

The dreams didn't appear two-dimensional like Bill. They were three-dimensional.

They had a _physical form_!

Bill gaining physical form would mean the end of everything, but _two_ of his kind like that!? Ford couldn't find it in himself to hide his sheer terror at the thought. "St-st-stay back! Stay away from me!"

The three stared at him, surprised by his outburst. The square one asked, "What's wrong, um…?"

"Ford," Nadia told him, brow furrowed in concern. "His name is Ford."

The square floated toward him. "Just calm down, Ford-"

"Don't come any closer!" Ford demanded, hating that he sounded as terrified as he felt. "I've dealt with dream demons before, and I'm _not_ doing it again!"

Nadia looked terrified, the square scratched its "head" in confusion, and Starclops smacked her forehead and groaned, " _Ugh_. You know Bill, don't you?"

Realization shown in the square's eyes, and he sighed. " _Now_ I get it."

Nadia just looked at him. "Get what? Who's Bill?"

Ford ignored her and glanced from one dream demon to the other. "Bill Cipher? You know him?"

Starclops gave him pointed look. "Listen, pal. Your childish panic is understandable, but the fact remains that not all dream demons are deranged lunatics."

"She's right," Ford flinched, when the square appeared behind him. "Bill gives our kind a really, _really_ bad name. And, frankly, he dresses too nice for his occupation."

Ford raised an eyebrow. "Occupation?"

Starclops leaned her "shoulder" on his, and he tensed. "He just means that dream demons usually don't go for formalities." She wrapped an arm around his shoulder and harshly poked his cheek. "Most of us are either casual, in your face, or somewhere in between."

"So, I see," Ford muttered, picking her arm off him, like it was about to explode.

Starclops did an aerial backflip away from him. "And, now that we've got that cleared up, how's about some introductions? My name's Starclops," she conjured an arrow above her head and pointed it to a flustered Nadia, "that mutant over there is Nadia," the arrow pointed to the rather annoyed-looking blue square, "and the dork over there is Tad Strange, but he goes by Tad." The arrow vanished. "Together, we are Team Trouble!"

Tad made a motion like he was pinching the bridge of the nose he didn't have. "Starclops, no one agreed to that name." He snapped his fingers in realization. "Speaking of trouble, I just remembered; I was in the minds of some of the policemen, and they want us out of here."

Nadia's lavender-colored eyes widen comically. "What? Why?"

Tad jammed his thumb in Ford's direction. "Seems Ford's not the only one who's heard about Bill. The townsfolk don't like dream demons prancing around."

"Oh, yeah," Starclops added. "I noticed that. And, some of them think that anyone who would travel with a dream demon is just as evil, or something? I don't know. I got distracted by sex-memories. Man, these people look good naked!"

Ford's frown deepened. That was a little more information than he needed to hear. Besides, if these three were fugitives or something, then that was his cue to get away from them. "Well, uh, Nadia, thanks for saving me, but I should really be going-"

His vision blurred, as dizziness washed over him. His thought he felt his knees buckle, but he wasn't sure. He was numb. Everything was numb. Was someone saying his name? He thought he heard a voice. Then another. So many sounds crashing into each other, fighting for dominance in his ear drums. One voice. Only one voice, he could recognize. It sent a wave of anger coiling around him.

Bill Cipher's disembodied voice sang, "I'm still here!"

* * *

 **Eek! Bill! *hides under the table* What's happening to Ford? Review to find out!**

 **VHHLQJ LV XVXDOOB EHOLHYLQJ.**


	3. Trust No One (Part Two)

**Summary:** **After falling into another dimension, Ford is rescued by a kindly mutant. Having no one else to turn to, he is forced to trust her. But, that doesn't mean he trusts the two dream demons that she's been traveling with.**

 **This is getting to be longer than I'd expected... I love writing this! Also, I forgot to mention that Starclops and Tad Strange are based on some _Gravity Falls_ theories.**

* * *

 **Chapter Two: Trust No One (Part Two)**

 _"Hey, Stanford! Wakey, wakey, Sleeping Beauty!"_

 _Ford's eyes fluttered open, and he once again had no idea where he was. Everything was pitch-black. Ford tried to move but found it impossible. His hands and feet were strapped down. There was no light, yet he could see himself and the metal table he was strapped to. How peculiar. A bright yellow glow appear above him, and he scowled, loathing coursing through him as he stared down the all too familiar triangle._

 _"Well, well, well," the triangle said. "For an insomniac, you sure know how to keel over, don't you?"_

 _"Bill Cipher," Ford growled. "What do you want?"_

 _Bill laughed. "You haven't changed a bit, have you, Six Fingers?" Ford didn't react. "Ah, don't give me that look. Did it ever occur to you that I might be here for a friendly chat? We never get time to talk, anymore."_

 _Ford struggled against his restraints, knowing that Bill couldn't possibly be here for a "friendly chat." "Let me go, you bastard!"_

 _Bill rubbed his "chin" in thought. "Hm. What's the word I'm looking for…?" He snapped his fingers. "Oh, yeah! The word is no!"_

 _"What do you want, Bill? Why did you bring me here?"_

 _"Ha! This guy and his questions! Some of them have answers and some will go unanswered." He checked the watch he didn't have. "Oh, geez, look at the time. Sorry to cut this short, Six Fingers, but I've gotta run." As he floated away, he called out, "Remember: Sticks and stones may break your bones...but names leave psychological wounds that never heal!"_

* * *

Ford's eyes snapped open. He was back in the tent. There was a campfire going, but that wasn't why he was sweating. Starclops appeared above him, reminding him far too much of his dream.

"Well, well, well," she said, sending a chill down Ford's spine. "Look who decided to wake up."

Ford shakily sat up on the small bed, fighting the light-headedness that left as quickly as it came. "What happened? Did- I- I fainted?" He narrowed his blue eyes in suspicion and looked from one creature to the next. "Alright, who did it, and what did you do?"

Tad, who until now had been stoking the fire, evaporated the metal pole he'd been using and raised his hands in defense. "Hey, man. No one did anything. Intentionally." The last word raised Ford's eyebrow. "See, this isn't technically anyone's fault. Nadia's healing-power-stuff usually works...but every now and then, you'll find someone who gets some sort of negative side effect to it."

"Like an allergic reaction?"

"Kind of, yeah."

Ford looked around the tent. "Where's Nadia, now?"

Tad pointed toward the exit. "Out there, somewhere. She was pretty upset, when you passed out."

Starclops leaned her elbows on Tad's head; he didn't seem to care. "Yeah, when she's upset, she takes to doodling," the female added. "And, damn, can that chick doodle!"

"We should probably go find her and tell her Ford's up," Tad told Starclops.

Starclops waved off his suggestion. "Eh. She'll come back. She always comes back." She turned her attention to Ford. "In the meantime, Sleeping Beauty, you should keep your strength up." She conjured...something on to his lap. "Have a pomnok."

Confused, Ford gingerly picked up the (potential) food. The "pomnok" was shaped a little like a fat carrot. It was furry like a peach, hot pink in color, and had wide, dull spikes growing from it. He sniffed it; it smelled like burnt toast. The dream demons were staring at him, assumingly waiting for him to eat it. Despite the sudden curdling in his stomach, Ford forced himself to bite into the non-spiked part of the…food…

He instantly felt stupid for doubting it. The pomnok was crunchy and sweet juices splashed across his tastebuds. He tried one of the spikes and was pleasantly surprised to learn that the spikes were chewy and had a savory, subtle spiciness to them. Together, the flavors created an umami that Ford simply couldn't put into words.

Starclops laughed. "Methinks the new guy's never had a pomnok before."

Ford swallowed, suddenly embarrassed. "We, uh, don't have these back in my dimension."

"I can tell."

Once Ford had finished off the strange food - Fruit? Vegetable? Something else entirely? - Tad commented, "Nadia's been gone for a while."

"How long?" Ford asked.

Tad shrugged. "Dunno exactly, something like...uh, I don't know how time works in your dimension, but I'd say approximately three hours." Ford blinked in surprise. "You were out for a while."

Ford weighed his options. He could go look for Nadia. Assuming she had been telling the truth, she _had_ saved his life, even he did have an adverse reaction to it. His other option: waiting in a room with two dream demons, whom he knew little to nothing about. A third option: leaving, pretending he'd never met the three of them, and wandering a dimension he knew absolutely nothing about.

Option one was sounding pretty good, right then.

Ford cleared his throat. "Well, uh, why don't I go look for her?" Tad looked at him quizzically. "You said she'd be glad to see me awake, right?"

"Do you even know anything about his dimension?" Tad asked.

Starclops pushed him. "I think we should all look. Split up to cover more ground." She looked at Ford and gave him a thumbs-up. "Kudos on the plan, Fordsy."

"Uh, my name's Ford," Ford corrected.

But, Starclops wasn't listening. She was already heading out the door. "Let's go, people!"

Tad looked at him and shrugged, struggling to figure out what to say. "She's kinda…" Giving up on a description, he sighed and left the tent.

* * *

The night sky on Earth had been beautiful, but this one was something else. The sky itself was ebony-black, but it was filled with colored lights. Pinks and greens and purples and everything in between juxtaposed the darkness in dancing shades that ranged from pale to neon. It was like a cross between the Northern Lights and the fireworks on Independence Day. It took everything in Ford not to get distracted.

Instead, he kept his focus on the figure sitting on the top of the hill. He wasn't completely certain it was Nadia, so he proceeded toward the shape as quietly as he could. The closer he got, the more it looked like Nadia, but he didn't know what types of creatures lived in this dimension.

He tempted fate. "Nadia?"

The creature turned her head - it was her - and gasped. She shot to her feet, dropping the notepad she had been writing in, and through her arms around him. "You're awake!" Before Ford had time to process what was happening, Nadia broke the embrace and ran her hands frantically over his body. _All_ over his body. "Are you alright? I-Is everything working?"

Ford grabbed her wrists before she could grab...certain things. "C-Calm down, Nadia. I'm fine."

Nadia gnawed her bottom lip. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize my powers would hurt you."

Ford gave a disbelieving laugh. _Hurt_ him? While there had been a backlash, it seemed pretty clear that she hadn't meant for anything bad to happen to him. "Uh, in case you haven't noticed, I'm sort of _alive_ because of your powers."

Nadia looked away and gave a shy smile. "I guess… So, what are you doing out here?"

"Well-" Ford realized that he was still holding her wrists and awkwardly released them. They fell to Nadia's sides, and Ford coughed in embarrassment. "Uh, your friends were worried about you. They said you'd been gone for three hours."

Judging by her obvious surprise, three hours must have been a similar timeframe in this dimension. Nadia bent down and hastily picked up her notepad and pencil. "I-I didn't realized how much time passed. I'm sorry."

Ford caught a glimpse of a picture in the pad before she closed it. "What's that?"

Nadia held up her pad. "This? It's my sketchbook." She opened it up, showcasing of a dense forest. "I-I'm sort of an amateur artist."

Ford blinked in disbelief. "Amateur?" He grabbed the sketchbook and started flipping through it. Each picture was better and more detailed than the last. "Why, these are amazing!" Nadia blushed. "You know, I draw a little, myself."

"Really?" Nadia grinned.

"Really," he replied, thinking of the sketches in his journals. "I'd show you, but all my artwork is back in my own dimension."

Still smiling, showing off some surprisingly shark-like teeth, Nadia took back her sketchbook and flipped it to a blank page. She held it and her pen out to him. "Wanna show me?"

Ford almost agreed to it, before remembering Tad and Starclops. "Maybe back at the camp. Your friends were pretty worried about you."

"It'll be fine." Nadia reached into her pants pocket and pulled out a thin rectangle of what appeared to be purple Play-Doh. Seeing Ford's confusion, Nadia clarified, "This is an elytopin. It let's me talk to people, when they're not around." She squeezed it. It contracted, like Play-Doh, then returned to its original shape. She said to it, "Call Tad Strange," and it glowed brightly for a moment.

When the light faded to a shimmer, Tad's voice came out of it. " _Hello?_ "

"Hi, Tad. It's Nadia."

Ford didn't know what was more mesmerizing: the elytopin itself or the eerie pale violet glow it gave to Nadia's face.

" _Nadia? Oh, thank Beelzebub._ " Tad sounded relieved. " _Is Ford with you?_ "

"Yeah, he's here," Nadia answered. She held the flat device closer to Ford's face. "Say hi, Ford."

Snapping out of his trance, though still pondering how the strange object worked, Ford hesitantly said to it, "Uh, hello, Tad."

" _Where are you guys?_ " Tad asked.

"On that big hill by camp," she answered. "Sorry, I was out for so long."

" _Eh, it's cool. We know how you get when you're in art-mode. I'll call Starclops and let her know everything's alright. Just bring yourselves back later, kay?_ "

"We will. See you." She squeezed the elytopin again, it stopped glowing, and she put it back in her pocket. "Okay, we have some time, now."

Ford's mind was still on the thing in her pocket. "That was, uh- We-We don't have communication devices like that on Earth."

Nadia tilted her head. "Earth?"

"That's what my dimension is called." Technically, his dimension was the Milky Way Galaxy, but it felt more natural to say that he was from Earth.

Nadia nodded, sat back down, and patted the ground beside her. Ford sat where she had been patting. Their legs dangled off the edge - apparently, the hill led to a cliff - and Nadia sat the notepad, opened to the blank page, and erasable pen on Ford's lap.

"Why don't you draw something?" Nadia suggested.

Ford stared at the blank canvas and picked up the pen. "What should I draw?"

His companion shrugged. "Whatever you want."

Ford made the mistake of looking at her. The wild lights in the sky surrounded her in a vibrant glow, giving a ghostly sheen to her dark complexion. Her eyes were quite literally glowing, but whether that was natural in the darkness or a trick of the light, Ford didn't know. A breeze had picked up, and Nadia frowned as some strands of her dark hair blew in her face. She ran a hand through her messy locks, removing the particularly stubborn ones from her face.

Ford smiled, pretending that his pulse hadn't just picked up speed. He knew exactly what to draw.

* * *

 **I promise this will get more interesting. Review!**

 **LW'V DOZDBV WKH TXLHW RQHV.**


	4. Trust No One (Part Three)

**Summary:** **After falling into another dimension, Ford is rescued by a kindly mutant. Having no one else to turn to, he is forced to trust her. But, that doesn't mean he trusts the two dream demons that she's been traveling with.**

 **Final part of the pilot episode. Be ready for angst, romance, demon antics, cryptograms, and Bob. The last one will make *cough* _slightly_ *cough* more sense in context.**

* * *

 **Chapter Three: Trust No One (Part Three)**

Ford didn't know how long they sat there, but he didn't care. He was too busy being entranced with his sketch. He eventually finished and paused to admire his work. Then, just as quickly felt embarrassed by it.

"It looks just like me."

Ford jumped at the voice. He swallowed, his face inflamed. He immediately regretted capturing her smiling face on paper. "Have you been watching me?"

Nadia's carefree smile never wavered. "I've just never really watched someone work before. It kind of makes me wonder if I look that focused, when I'm making my own artworks." She took the pad and pen from him. She smiled at the sketched portrait of her - one that, Ford realized, had nothing on her actual profile - before flipping to a new page. "Now, I'm feeling inspired. Do you mind if I draw you?"

Ford started at the request. "I-I suppose not."

Nadia grinned, and Ford could have sworn his stomach had turned inside-out. The mutant began her portrait, and Ford found himself observing her. The way her small hand seemed to glide over the paper, the way her brow pinched in concentration, the way her smile morphed into something a bit more determined. He briefly wondered if he had looked like that when _he_ was drawing _her_.

"I think you do," he stated.

Nadia didn't stop working, as she asked, "Do what?"

"Look as focused as me, when you work. I think you probably do."

Nadia stopped drawing and looked at him, her expression unreadable. Ford wondered if he had said something offensive. Then, she smiled softly and returned to her work. Ford released the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding.

Their peace was interrupted by the sudden appearance of two dream demons, both looking more than a little freaked out.

Starclops smacked the pen out of Nadia's hand and exclaimed, "Cut the romantic crap! We've got a mob after us!"

Nadia clutched the sketchpad to her chest and visibly paled, though it was unclear if it was because of the bad news or the phrase "romantic crap." "I-I beg your pardon?"

"The townsfolk gathered in the form of an angry mob stereotype," Tad explained a lot more calmly, but it was clearly forced. "Starclops and I managed to elude them, but they burned our camp."

"Those guys have _definitely_ heard of Bill Cipher," Starclops added.

As he and Nadia got to their feet, Ford couldn't help commenting, "You know, this seems kind of unfair. Call me a hypocrite, but it doesn't seem right for people to judge your entire species based on the knowledge of _one_ of your kind."

Starclops crossed her arms and squinted at him. "Oh? What's _your_ excuse, Dr. Hypocrisy?"

Ford looked away in guilt, especially since he still wasn't sure what to make of Nadia's friends. "Point taken."

A commotion was heard was the bottom of the hill. Ford and Nadia turned around, and the latter drew in a sharp breath and pulled a hand over her mouth in shock. A horde of faceless people, carrying pitchforks and torches - so they _were_ an angry mob stereotype - was getting dangerously close to finding them. One of the members pointed to them and shouted something Ford didn't understand. Whatever it was, it certainly got the rest of the mob riled up. They headed toward their targets.

"What do we do?" Nadia asked, though it was unclear whether or not she expected an answer.

Tad gave her one that wasn't very helpful. "I don't know! It's not like we can just beat them up for trying to protect themselves."

Starclops nodded in agreement. "Yeah, even if they _are_ all idiots for just," she passed Ford a pointed look, " _assuming_ we're evil. _Hint, hint_."

Ford frowned, knowing that she was right (and feeling like total crap because of it). Just because she and Tad were Bill's species didn't mean they were like him. He looked down at the mob, who were about to ascend the hill, probably aware that their targets would have no safe means of escape, given the cliff. Although, it may not have dawned on them that Tad and Starclops could just teleport themselves away.

So, why weren't they doing that now?

The answer was obvious, Ford realized. Tad and Starclops were floating protectively in front of him and Nadia. They were trying to _protect_ them. Maybe they _weren't_ like Bill.

Ford pushed past them and made his way toward the crowd below, ignoring Nadia's cry of, "Ford, what you doing?"

He stopped at the base of the hill, and the faceless mob stopped in front of him. Before he could second-guess himself, Ford cleared his throat. "Okay, um, does anyone here speak Eng- Er, the universal language?" About half of the crowd raised their hands, none of which had any fingers. Ford briefly wondered how they were able to hold their pitchforks and torches, as their weapons seemed to merely stick to the ends of their...probably-hands? "Alright. Please, translate for those that don't. Now, I'm sure that this is all just a big misunderstanding. I had a similar first impression of them, but it's clear to me now that these dream demons mean you no harm." Nadia, Tad, and Starclops came down to stand beside him. "The mutant with them is also very kind and friendly. Now, what's say we all drop the pitchforks and put out the torch fires and start over?"

The silence was unbearable. Ford wished that the populace had faces so that he could see what they were thinking. Nadia put her hand on his shoulder and flashed a grateful smile. He looked to the other side of him. Starclops gave him a thumbs-up, and Tad literally glowed in approval.

Someone in the crowd shouted, " _Kill them all_!" then repeated herself in the native language.

"Well, that didn't work," Starclops commented. She pushed them all away. "Let's bail!"

They ran. Well, Ford and Nadia ran. Tad and Starclops just flew along side them. The mob stayed hot on their tail.

Something occurred to Ford. "Can't you guys just teleport us to safety?"

"We tried teleporting with a partner once," Tad answered. "Let's just say, the guy was seriously messed up from it."

Ford didn't ask what that meant. Nadia tripped and fell on top of him, sending them both to the ground. Ford lifted his head, spat out a mouthful of grass (which felt strangely similar to carpeting), and rolled Nadia off of him. The two dream demons magicked them to their feet.

"Hey, isn't that the guy we teleported with?" Starclops wondered.

Ford followed her gaze and nearly fell over again. The giant head looked perfectly human and so did the arm. The problem was that the arm was coming out of the _top of the head_ , and there were no other body parts. It was using its huge hand to drag itself around.

 _This_ was what happened when dream demons teleported with people!?

"Excuse me." It's voice was loud, deep like a man's, and disturbingly human. The mob stopped dead. The creature pointed to itself. "Will one of you please get in my mouth?"

The mobbers screamed and ran, their mission apparently forgotten. Ford didn't know whether to be relieved or run away with them.

"See why we don't teleport with partners?" Tad asked casually.

Starclops waved happily at the strange head-creature. "Thanks, Bob!"

The bizarre creature - with a bizarrely normal name - dragged itself toward them. "Perhaps one of you would like to get in my mouth?"

Nadia used the hand that wasn't clutching her sketchbook to pick a rock up off the ground and threw it. "Leave us alone!" The rock hit Bob in the forehead - or maybe the armpit - and fell harmlessly in front of him. "Why did I think that would work?"

Bob glanced down at it, unfazed, then looked back at them. "Seriously? That's just rude. Now someone get in my mouth."

"Zap!" Starclops shouted, as she fired a mint-green beam from her finger. Bob cringed in pain as more beams it him. "Zap! Zap! Zap!"

Bob scowled. "Fine! I can take a hint! I'll find someone else to get in my mouth!" With that, he dragged himself in the opposite direction, muttering about how he would complain to his mother about them.

* * *

After that...experience was over, the four of them eventually found an uninhabited cave and decided to make a new camp there for the time being. Tad snapped his fingers, and a red fire blazed in the center. They all sat around it and didn't speak for a while.

Eventually, Ford cleared his throat. "Well, now that we have some time, maybe you all could answer a few questions for me. First off, where exactly are we?"

"In a cave," Starclops said.

Ford rolled his eyes. "I realize that. I mean, what is this area called? What's the name of this dimension?"

"Well, I can't help you with the name of the dimension itself," Tad replied, "but the town's called Xytophsky, and the natives are called Twileens."

Ford nodded. "Okay, now what in Hell's name was that...head-thing?"

Starclops laughed. "'That head-thing' is the reason we don't teleport with people. Poor Bob. We messed him up good! Before we got to him, the _last_ thing he was interested in was eating people!"

"And, he looked like...the way he looks, even then?"

"Yeah, totally. But, he wasn't nearly as cranky."

"Uh...yeah. And, what exactly are you all doing here, anyway?"

"We're DHs," Tad answered.

Ford raised an eyebrow. "DHs?"

"It stands for Dimension Hoppers. We wander a dimension until a rift opens up, then we move on to the next place. We _hop_ through dimensions. Dimension Hoppers. Get it?"

Starclops rolled her eye. "I guess the guy who named it thought it was funny."

Ford took a moment to process this information. "And, do rifts open up often?"

Tad nodded. "Oh, yeah. Natural rifts, usually. But, on very rare occasions, we stumble across a synthetic rift, like the one you came through."

Natural rifts. Synthetic rifts. Could these have been the cause of all the unusual creatures in Gravity Falls? If so, why Gravity Falls? Why not Glass Shard Beach or Paris or some other part of Earth? Ford glanced over at Nadia, who had been quietly drawing away in her sketchbook. This close up, he could see just how deeply her cheek had been cut, but he didn't want to make her uncomfortable by asking how she came to receive such a scar.

"You seem awful quiet," he commented instead.

Nadia didn't look up. She spoke so quietly, Ford almost didn't hear her. "I trusted the Twileens."

Ford felt a pang of sympathy. He thought back to the way he'd trust Bill.

" _Bill! You lied to me! Where does that portal really lead?"_

" _You can't stop a bridge between our worlds from coming, but it would be fun to watch you try. Cute, even!"_

Ford forced the memory to the back of his mind. Tad and Starclops were busying themselves with what appeared to some sort of game, involving black blobs of floating...things and making them...fight or something. Ford scooted closer to Nadia and watched her draw. He blinked. So, she _had_ decided to draw him. The sketch depicted him with a furrowed brow and a determined smile. Assumingly, he really did look as she did right now, when he was focused on something he liked. But, now, her expression had a darker undertone to it. Ford knew why.

"You know, I know what it's like to be betrayed," he told her.

She stopped drawing and looked skeptically at him. "Oh?"

Ford sighed. Should he tell her? It seemed too late to back out. Especially, now that Tad and Starclops had magicked away their game pieces and were currently looking at him expectantly.

He decided that he didn't have much choice. "You see, back on Earth, my home-dimension, I worked as a paranormal researcher. I was studying certain creatures in a town called Gravity Falls."

Starclops groaned. "Apparently, someone thought _that_ was also funny."

Tad ignored her. "What kind of creatures did you research?"

"Ones that were unusual for my dimension," Ford replied. "Ones that were only told of in legend or weren't even heard of at all. Up until today, no one on Earth, as far as I know, had ever even heard of the occurrence of natural rifts, so no one knew where these creatures were coming from. I suspected that these creatures had come to Earth from another world." He looked meaningfully at the dream demons. "That's when I met Bill Cipher. He came to me in a dream and told me that he chose one brilliant mind a century to inspire." He groaned and ran a frustrated hand over his face. "I can't believe I was dumb enough to consider him a friend. Anyway, he tricked me into building a portal that would open a gateway between dimensions."

"So, a machine that would produce a synthetic rift?" Nadia guessed.

"Exactly. Long story short, I discovered that Bill wanted the portal for something much more sinister. I'm not entirely sure what his plans are, but I knew then that I had to shut down the portal, thus severing the link between our worlds."

"But, if you turned off the portal," Tad said, "how did you end up here?"

Ford bit his bottom lip.

" _Stanley, you don't understand what I'm up against! What I've been through!"_

" _You think_ you've _got problems? I've got a_ mullet _, Stanford!"_

" _I'm giving you a chance to do the first worthwhile thing in your life, and you won't even listen!"_

" _You care more about your dumb mysteries than your family? Well then, you can have 'em!"_

Starclops conjured a large white hand and used it to slap him in the face. Ford yelped and rubbed his now-stinging cheek. "Ow. Seriously?"

Starclops laughed. "You were zoned out for so long, I couldn't resist. Now, how'd you end up here?"

Ford adjusted his glasses and looked away. "That's not something I'm comfortable answering."

They sat in awkward silence for a minute, then Tad tapped him on the shoulder. "So, what are you gonna do now?"

"What do you mean?" Ford asked.

"Do you have anywhere to go or anything?" Ford's frowned deepened. His silence was all the answer Tad needed. "In that case… Well, I've been thinking, and I'm hoping the girls here will back me up on this, it was pretty brave of you to stand up for us. We're usually the misfits with no friends besides each other, so it was a nice change." Misfits with no friends… Ford glanced sadly down at his six-fingered hands on his lap. "And, you're obviously pretty smart. Also, you seemed pretty calm about being apparently-forced into a foreign dimension. Most people would have gone insane within the first hour." Fiddleford McGucket came to mind. "I guess what I'm trying to say is, if you don't have somewhere to be or anything, maybe you'd like to travel with us."

Ford blinked in shock. Travel with them? Even though it was clear that none of them wanted to hurt him (probably), the idea was completely ludicrous. They were two dream demons with physical forms and a mutant with healing properties. He was a powerless human with little-to-no knowledge of other dimensions. What use would he be?

Starclops must have felt the same, because she started laughing. "Him? What good would he be?"

Tad shrugged. "I just have a feeling about this guy." He wrapped his arm around her. "Remember when I had a feeling about you? Everyone told me not to trust you, but I didn't listen, now did I?"

Starclops didn't respond, but the look in her eye said that she didn't have an argument.

Nadia smiled at the human beside her. "Well, I think it's a great idea."

Ford shook his head. "No, Starclops is right. All I'd do is slow you guys down. Besides, I'd like to return to my own dimension at some point."

"Which only gives you incentive to be a fellow dimension-hopper," Tad pointed out. "Natural rifts are unpredictable, but if Bill _does_ need a synthetic rift to get to your dimension, then maybe natural ones are your best bet. Plus, there's safety in numbers."

Tad had a point, but… Ford sighed. "Can I think about it?"

"Sure. We'll probably start rift-hunting in the morning, so take some time to think, 'kay?"

* * *

Ford couldn't sleep. Too much had happened that day. His mind was racing from the portal-incident, his dream about Bill, having a run-in with an angry mob, that big...head...thing. And, of course, Tad's offer. It was a good offer. Ford didn't know how to get home without going through a rift, and the demon had brought up some very good points. Still, Ford couldn't let go of the nagging feeling that at least one of the three was hiding something. He sighed, giving up on sleep.

Tad and Starclops were supposed to be on lookout duty; apparently - although, unsurprisingly - dream demons didn't need sleep. However, as Nadia had explained to him, they were more likely spying on other people's dreams. It made sense, given their species. Ford looked over at Nadia.

She had been whimpering in her sleep for a while and muttering something in her native language ("Sohdvh vwrs... L fdq'w khos lw…"). She was obviously having a nightmare. Ford wanted to wake her up, but he knew from experience that doing so could scare her even more.

However, when she started screaming, "Qr! Vwrs lw! L kdwh brx!" and clawing at the wall of the cave, Ford knew he had to do something.

He all but leaped to her side and shook her shoulder. "Nadia! Nadia, wake up!"

Nadia's eyes shot open, and her hand glowed pale blue. She threw a blue orb - Ford _barely_ dodged it in time - and it landed on the wall a short distance away, huge ice crystals in its place. Ford made a mental note of her abilities: healing and now ice. What more was this woman capable of?

"Ford?" Her frightened squeak brought him back to the present. It hadn't been a trick of the light, before; her eyes really did glow in the dark. Night vision, perhaps? Only, now they held a watery sheen. "Oh, no... A-are you okay? I'm so sorry! I-I didn't mean to-"

Ford held up a silencing hand and offered a comforting smile. "It's alright, Nadia. What I'd like to know is, are _you_ okay?" He looked down at her hands in alarm. "You're-You're bleeding!"

Nadia stared at her hands - bloody from clawing at a stone wall - and balled them into fists. They glowed white momentarily, and then her hands looked as they had before they'd been injured. She didn't look up. "I'm sorry I woke you."

"I was up, anyway." Ford placed a gently hand over one of hers; were her hands small, or were his just really big? "I don't know if your kind do this, but humans, like myself, usually feel better if we tell someone about our nightmares."

Nadia tried to play it off like she was brushing hair from her face, but Ford knew that she was really brushing tears from her eyes. His heart broke for her. "I don't remember what it was about." It was one of the least convincing lies Ford had ever heard, but he knew better than to push her to tell him. She finally looked at him. He pretended not to notice how sad she looked. "Why were you awake?"

She was purposely changing the subject. Ford allowed it. "It's been a hell of a day, Nadia. As you can well-imagine, I've got a lot on my mind." Nadia nodded in understanding. She seemed relieved that he was playing along. "Tell me, Nadia, how do you feel about traveling through dimensions with Tad and Starclops?"

Nadia smiled, this time genuinely. "It's amazing! I've seen so many species, learned so many things! Sure, we've had some tight spots, but we always have each other's backs." She looked outside, at the colorful night sky, a contented sigh escaping her lips. "I don't know much about Bill, other than what you told me, but I know he's different than Tad and Starclops. They're the best friends you could ask for." She looked back at Ford, who couldn't help being borderline-hypnotized by her the glow of her eyes. If her nightmare hadn't been forgotten before, it was forgotten now. "I'm not going to make you come with us, Ford, but I think you'd really like it."

She looked back outside, and Ford gazed at the lights with her. If Nadia noticed that his hand was still over hers, she didn't comment or pull away. Not that Ford minded.

* * *

The both woke to freezing cold water pouring over them. Nadia cried out in shock, and Ford yelled, "What the fu-"

Starclops was doubled over in laughter, as she magicked away a now-empty bucket. "Holy crap! Were-Were you two ha-having _fun_ , last night?" Whatever else she was trying to say was lost in a fit of insane laughter.

Ford and Nadia both blushed as it dawned on them what happened. Apparently, they had fallen asleep next to each other. They simultaneously protested that they didn't do anything, but Starclops was too busy laughing to pay any attention.

At least, until Tad smacked the back of her head. "Knock it off, Star," he chided. "They're fully clothed, aren't they? I'm pretty sure all they did was sleep."

If Starclops had a mouth, she would have been grinning madly. "Oh, I bet they slept _real_ good!"

"We didn't do anything," Nadia muttered, as she and Ford stood up, their faces still burning with embarrassment.

Tad made a noise that sounded like a tongue clicking. "So...uh, Ford. You, uh, have you thought about my offer?"

Ford nodded, grateful for Tad's diversion. "Yeah. If you'll all have me, I suppose I could join up with you guys, for a while."

Starclops giggled. "Yeah, you wanna join _all_ of us. _Sure_." Tad smacked her head again. "Oh, I'm kidding. Lighten up, Stranger."

Ford chuckled at their antics. He had a feeling that he'd have to get used to that. A pang hit him, when he realized how similar Starclops was to his brother… He forced the thought out of his mind.

"You'll get used to them," Nadia said. She was already wearing the backpack Tad had conjured for her last night. "I'm glad you decided to stay."

Tad nodded. "We have a lot of fun. You'll have a great time."

"Hey, doofuses," Starclops said, looking at something nearby. "Check out this brand of perfect timing."

They all followed her gaze. Not far from the cave, was a glowing white light. It's shape morphed nonstop, its outline moving in a circular motion. What was it?

Tad must have sensed Ford's confusion. He gestured to the shaped and explained, "That, right there, is a rift. You can tell it's naturally occurring, because it has no definite shape."

Starclops started towards it. "Well, let's get a move on, then."

The others followed. Ford asked, "Where will it take us?"

Tad shrugged. "Heck, if we know. Like I said, these things are unpredictable."

"But, the randomness only adds to the excitement," Nadia added.

Ford took a deep breath, steadying his rising nerves, and followed them into the rift.

* * *

 **Did you all like the first episode? I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it...which is a lot. Now, I want you guys' opinions. I plan on making this into three seasons: one for each decade Ford is in the portal, each focusing on a different sort of plot (probably). What I want to know is...should I make a separate story for each season, or should I just stick them all in one story? Please review, then vote on my profile.**

 **Also, if you have an idea for an episode, please let me know. If I like it, I just might post it!**

 **HYHUBRQH KDV VHFUHWV. VRPH DUH MXVW ELJJHU WKDQ RWKHUV.**


	5. Wrath of the Volcano God (Part One)

**Summary: A group of island natives invite the gang to join them in their festivities. All is well, until the natives try to sacrifice Nadia to a god that lives in a volcano. (Inspired by the _Courage the Cowardly Dog_ episode, "Courage Under the Volcano")**

* * *

 **Chapter Four: Wrath of the Volcano God (Part One)**

If Ford had to describe what traveling through a rift felt like, he wasn't sure he could have. There was the blinding light, the rush of wind that felt grating on his skin. Stepping into it had taken little effort, but the rift itself seemed to push him out of the other end. At least it was more tame than traveling through his own portal. Faster than his brain could process, he was out of the whirlwind, landing on his stomach on warm sand.

Starclops laughed and levitated him to his feet. "Dimension-hopping takes some getting used to."

Ford dusted himself off and surveyed his surroundings. The rift had sent them to a beach or maybe an island. The sky was dark gray- No, the _sky_ wasn't gray. That was smoke. The four of them were standing next to a smoking volcano. Ford tensed. This may of been another dimension, but that didn't mean an active volcano wasn't dangerous. It certainly didn't help that it was incredibly humid, and he was still wearing a sweatshirt.

Nadia was equally uncomfortable. "Is it me, or is it really, _really_ hot here?"

Ford fiddled with the bottom of his sweatshirt. "Would it be weird if I took this thing off?"

Tad sighed. "Poor flesh-walkers." He pointed to himself. "Makes me glad I don't have a nervous system."

"Me too!" Starclops piped. "Hey, do you hear that?"

Ford listened. "Yeah. It sounds like drums."

"And, some kind of chanting or something," Tad added.

Nadia nodded in the direction it was coming from. "C'mon. Let's check it out."

The dream demons followed her, but Ford hesitated. Was this how it worked? No planning? No caution? Just jumping into whatever? _Reminds me of Stanley._

"Coming, Ford?" Tad called.

"Uh, yeah," Ford replied, following the rest of the group.

The sounds got louder, as they got closer. Eventually Nadia pulled some strange leaves out of their way, and they found the source of the commotion. It reminded Ford of the Indian rituals he'd seen in movies. There were at least thirty creatures, all of which had skin in varying shades of purple, grass skirts, and - even the males, who didn't seem to have breasts - coconut bras. They all had plump bodies and faces, but their limbs were disproportionately bony. Most of them were standing in a circle, dancing in place; some were playing drums straight out of a Dr. Suess book. A couple of the women were circling a large bonfire, doing an elegant dance. A man with pale skin and a leafy crown was standing dangerously close to the fire, his arms raised to the volcano, chanting something unintelligible. Soon enough, the chanting stopped and the fire blasted into the sky, any trace of it gone. The strange beings cheered.

"Can we go now?" Starclops asked. "This is...weird. Even for us."

The one with the crown spotted them and smiled. He said something Ford didn't understand, most likely addressing his own people. He then walked toward Ford and his group. "Greetings, travelers!" he said warmly. He wrapped them all in a choking group hug. After releasing them, thus allowing them to breathe, he said, "I am Chief Kokawikiwakawikiwakawikiwakawikiwakawikiwaka, leader of Wikiwaka tribe! Welcome to our camp!"

None of them spoke, so Ford cleared his throat. "Um, greetings, Chief Kowa...bunga...ta-tapioca… Am I even close, right now?"

The tribe leader laughed and smacked him hard on the back. "You call me Chief. Everyone call me Chief!"

"Well, that _is_ infinitely easier to say."

Chief gestured for them to follow as he headed for the camp. "Come, come! We not get many visitors!" They exchanged wary looks and followed. "You in for treat! You come during celebration!"

"Celebration of what?" Nadia asked.

"Of Volcano God, of course! Volcano God protect tribe. Each year, we hold big celebration in return! You come at wonderous time!"

Ford asked his companions, "Is this freaking out anyone else?"

"A little, yes," Tad answered.

Chief chuckled and wagged his finger at them. "Oh ho ho! You not wear that for celebration. You wear ceremonial clothing!"

He clapped twice, shouted something, and Ford and Nadia cried out as white flames engulfed them. It didn't hurt; they were just startled. When the flames died off, they were both wearing grass skirts and coconut bras. Starclops snorted.

Nadia's face flushed, and she threw her arms around her torso. "I wouldn't call this _clothing_."

As for Ford, he felt a draft in… "There better be something covering me under this skirt." He turned away from everyone, lifted up his skirt, then turned back around in horror. "Oh God, there isn't!"

Chief ignored their discomfort. "Now, you join celebration! We have feast and fire dance and sacrifice!"

As Chief jaunted merrily away, Ford thought over what the strange man had said. "Did he say 'sacrifice?'"

"Did he say _fire dance_?" Tad asked nervously.

Starclops waved off his concerns. "I'm sure it's nothing to worry about."

The demons floated off to join the festivities. Nadia followed, still hugging herself, muttering about how much she hated the "clothing" they'd been given. Ford was pretty sure he hated it more. For obvious reasons.

Then, he noticed something and caught up to her. "Uh, Nadia?" She stopped walking and faced him. Ford wasn't certain that she would give him an answer, but he knew that not knowing would drive him half-crazy. "You-You don't have to answer, but...a-are those all _scars_?"

Nadia visibly paled; apparently, lying wasn't something she was good at. "No. That's just the way my skin looks."

She hurried away and sat down to watch the fire dancers. Ford wasn't fooled. He knew scars when he saw them, and she had them _everywhere_. Still, despite wanting to know more, he didn't push the matter. If she was going to tell him, she would when she was ready. Besides, for all he knew, that _could_ have just been the way her skin looked.

* * *

After getting almost-used to the skirt and bra, Ford actually managed to have fun. Granted, the chief seemed to be the only one who could speak any English - broken, as it was - but he was more than happy to translate. The fire dancers were fascinating to watch, and Ford enjoyed trying the various types of local delicacies, specifically meat from an animal called a "bonshtoly," which tasted similar to steak. He was no longer worried about the sacrifice, because Chief had assured that they were sacrificing an animal and not a person.

An anxious Tad sat on the ground beside Ford, seemingly mesmerized by the fire dancers. That or he was waiting for Starclops, who was flying around with her own flames, to accidently set someone on fire.

As for an unnerved Nadia, a couple of women took her aside and started running around her, throwing hibiscus-like flowers at her. The poor mutant seemed to be debating between staying put and running away. At least they had given her something more than a bra and skirt: she now wore a short dress made of large green leaves and a crown of the same pink flowers.

"Uh, Ford?" He was snapped out of his musings by Starclops knocking him on the head. "You're smart, right? What should you do, if you accidently set someone on fire?"

Ford glanced in half-surprise at the particularly large man with literally flaming hair, who ran to the ocean, screaming, and dived into the water. Ford didn't know how respond.

"He'll be fine," Tad stated after a moment.

The three of them cringed, when one of the Wikiwakas banged an ear-shattering gong. Chief made a speech in the native language, and his tribe mates chanted, "Oo ya mauka, oo ya mauka, oo oo!" Chief said something else, and the natives cried out the same thing. This happened one more time.

Ford whispered, "Do you guys have any idea what they're saying?"

"Definitely not," Tad replied.

"I think they're just crazy," Starclops added.

Some of the natives ran off somewhere, as Chief strolled merrily to the visitors. "By looks on faces, you not know what we say, yes?" They just shook their heads. Chief laughed. "Oh, visitors. So kawaii!"

Ford raised an eyebrow. "Kawaii?"

"It basically means, sickeningly adorable," Starclops informed him. "Like Nadia when she was little."

When she was _little_? Ford was about to ask how long she and Nadia had known each other, but he was interrupted by Chief saying, "I tell tribe ceremonial words. It time for sacrifice to Volcano God."

"Ah, sweet!" Tad said. Ford was surprised by his enthusiasm on the subject. The demon rubbed his hand together in anticipation. "So, where is it? Where's the poor sucker?" Ford and Starclops stared at him. Tad coughed in embarrassment. "Is-Is what I'd say, if I was half-insane. Heh heh heh."

Chief laughed and wrapped a bony arm around Tad's shoulders. "This square, I like! Sacrifice being prepared right now. Being dressed in ceremonial fragrance." He looked toward Nadia, who coughed loudly, as she was sprayed by a plant that looked like a purple venus fly trap. "There. Now, sacrifice ready."

Ford couldn't believe what he was implying. "Wait, you're not talking about Nadia, are you?"

Chief shrugged. "Is problem?"

Starclops put her hands on her hips. "Is definitely problem!"

Tad angrily rose from his seat. "You can't sacrifice Nadia!"

"You said you were going to sacrifice an _animal_!" Ford recalled, getting to his feet.

"Yes," Chief nodded, not quite understanding why the visitors were so upset. He smiled, when two women brought Nadia over to him. "And, we grateful for visitors bring animal to sacrifice!"

Nadia titled her head. "Sacrifice? What's-What's going on?" He hoisted Nadia over his shoulder. "Hey!"

"Now, you be sacrifice to Volcano God!"

" _What_?" Nadia held out her hands and fired to icy blasts at Chief's feet, freezing him to the ground. The girls who brought her gasped. Nadia struggled in the larger creature's grip, terror visible on her face. "Let me go! I don't want to be a sacrifice!"

"You can't sacrifice _her_!" Ford exclaimed in shock. "You said you used animals, and she is _not_ an animal!"

"She is _mutant_ ," Chief reminded. "Mutant is good as animal." Nadia stopped struggling. "Mutant no good to people. But, good as sacrifice."

Ford didn't know what was more alarming: Chief's words or the solemn acceptance in Nadia's eyes.

* * *

 **Will she be sacrificed? Review to find out!**

 **ZKHQ BRX SODB ZLWK ILUH, BRX ZLOO JHW EXUQHG.**


	6. Wrath of the Volcano God (Part Two)

**Summary:** **A group of island natives invite the gang to join them in their festivities. All is well, until the natives try to sacrifice Nadia to a god that lives in a volcano. (Inspired by the _Courage the Cowardly Dog_ episode, "Courage Under the Volcano")**

* * *

 **Chapter Five: Wrath of the Volcano God (Part Two)**

Nadia shook her head clear. "Surely, there's something else you could do? Like, use some _other_ animal, perhaps?"

Ford raised an eyebrow. Why wasn't she defending herself? The chief had said that she was "no good to people" and had practically called her an _animal_. Even if she _was_ an animal - which, for all Ford knew, she might have been - she could have defended herself against the other insult.

Chief lowered her to the ground. "Well, you could speak with Volcano God. See if he spare life."

" _Speak_ to him?" Ford asked incredulously. "How do you _talk_ to a _god_?"

Chief pointed to the volcano. "Volcano God live deep in volcano. You go in volcano. If Volcano God want spare life, he spare life. If not, he take life." He smiled. "It win-win!"

Starclops whispered, "I don't think he knows what a win-win is."

Ford shook his head. This whole situation was insane. Going into a _volcano_ to talk to a _god_? Maybe Starclops was right; maybe the natives _were_ crazy.

Nadia sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, probably thinking the same thing. "How exactly am I supposed to get in the volcano?"

"I show you way," Chief said. "Soon as feet stop being ice."

"Yeah…" Nadia smiled sheepishly. "Sorry about that."

Chief chuckled good-naturedly. "It alright. Mutant do terrible things. It why mutant must be dead."

Nadia bit her lip and looked away. Ford scowled. "Alright, alright. That's enough! Would someone _please_ explain to me what the big deal is with Nadia?" He narrowed his eyes at Chief. "Why do you hate her so much?"

Chief shrugged. His tone suggested that Ford had asked a stupid question. "Why you _not_ hate mutant?"

Ford was torn between standing there in shock and punching Chief in the face. He decided that the former was less likely to make things worse. Nadia's face regained a sad acceptance. Why wasn't she saying anything? Perhaps she had some sort of bad blood with these people? She seemed okay with them before, even curious.

Nadia groaned and threw her hands up in defeat. "Just get me in the volcano."

Ford hoped she meant to find the god. "I'll come too." Nadia looked at him in surprise. "What? You didn't think you'd be going in there alone, did you? Besides, I kind of want to get a look this god, myself." It wasn't a lie; he _was_ curious. But, if he was completely honest, he was just worried she might try to do something crazy in the volcano. Well, something crazy that _wasn't_ searching for a god.

Chief looked between them and grinned, raising his arms in delight. "The more the marriage-er!"

"Marriage-er?" Starclops repeated in confusion.

"We gotta get this guy English lessons," Ford commented.

Nadia shrugged. She asked, "Starclops? Do you want to come?"

Ford wondered why she didn't ask Tad. Then, he saw Tad staring at the volcano, visibly shaking. Pyrophobia, perhaps? He _had_ seemed kind of tense around the fire dancers.

"Uh, no thanks," Starclops replied uncertainly. She put an arm around Tad's shoulders. "I think I'll just try to keep this guy grounded." She glanced down at the ground they were floating above. "Metaphorically speaking."

* * *

After Tad and Starclops had conjured them some fire-retardant jumpsuits, Chief led Ford and Nadia through the jungle and to the volcano. Specifically, the volcano's entrance.

"Are we seriously taking an _elevator_?" Ford asked in disbelief. This dimension-hopping thing would _really_ take some getting use to.

"What is elevator?" Chief asked. He pressed a button by the door. "This door take you into volcano. You go up Sacred Stairs to top. There, you find Vocano God. May force be with you on journey."

The door opened, and Chief pushed them inside. They landed on the steaming ground - thank goodness for their new jumpsuits- and the door closed behind them. They stood up and Nadia tried to pry open the door but it didn't budge.

"Well," Ford stated, staring up at the staircase, which seemed dangerously narrow and had no banister, that spiraled up the side of the volcano, "looks like there's nowhere to go but up."

Nadia looked fearfully down at the lava, muttering, "How do I get myself into these things?" A large lava bubble popped in front of her, and she jumped back in shock. "Let's just get this over with."

* * *

The ascent up the stairs was too hot, too narrow, too dangerous, and just plain bizarre. Then again, if Ford was going to be stuck with his new little group, he supposed he would have to get use to weird things happening. He had to constantly remind himself that he was in another dimension, and things like this were probably commonplace around here.

Still, that didn't stop him from jumping at every creak of the steps, every bubble of what he assumed was molten lava, every pop of the bubbles that would occasionally float upward just a hair too close. At one point, Nadia had tried to cool one of the bubble with her ice powers. All she had succeeded to do was pop it faster.

Eventually, the silence between them became more than Ford's raging thoughts could handle. "So, Nadia, perhaps you could provide an answer for me?"

"Okay," she replied. "Shoot."

"Do you have some sort of history with the islanders? I don't know about the rest of them, but their leader doesn't seem very fond of you." He was walking behind her, so he couldn't see her face, but she wasn't answering his question. "You don't have to get into detail. Just a simple yes or no will suffice."

Nadia flinched when a jet of steam pierced through the rock in front of her. It stopped, and they both went by it quickly. "Why do you want to know?" she asked.

Ford shrugged, despite the fact that she couldn't see him. "It just bothered me how discriminatory he was being towards you." Then, he recalled his first meeting with Tad and Starclops and… God, he felt like a hypocrite.

"Discri-what? I don't know that word in- What did you call it? English? What does the word mean?"

"Discriminatory? It basically means that he was being rude to you simply because you're different than him. At least, I think that's why he was acting that way. Although, he seemed pretty jovial around me, Tad, and Starclops, and we're just as different, if not more so."

"I think he's just a happy person."

"Probably, but-" Suddenly, he got the sense that she didn't want to talk about this. "Oh, nevermind. Perhaps you could tell me something else? It's nothing to do with you. I'd just like to know if Tad is afraid of fire, or something. He sure acted like it."

"Yeah, fire kind of freaks him out. I don't know what caused it, but it must have been pretty bad."

Ford nodded then remembered that she couldn't see him. "I see."

* * *

They were both exhausted by the time they reached the top of the stairs. The humidity of their surroundings really wasn't helping.

"So many stairs…" Nadia huffed.

Ford stretched out his back. "Let's just find this god and get this sorted out."

They walked up to the over-sized stone door. Ford was about to knock, but the doors opened on their own. A deep, booming voice from inside called out, " **Enter!** "

Ford and Nadia exchanged nervous looks then hesitantly did as they were told. The doors closed behind them. The room was completely empty and humid. An orange light swirled in the center of the room, growing into a huge fire. The fire morphed into the shape of a floating head. The mortals took a few fearful steps back.

" **Who dares disturb the God of the Volcano?** " the god demanded.

Nadia swallowed and waved nervously. "H-Hi, Volcano God. I'm Nadia, and I-I was wondering i-if you'd maybe, um... _not_ take me as a sacrifice?"

Volcano God scowled. " **Are you questioning my demands?** "

Nadia shrunk back. "M-Maybe?" she squeaked.

Ford noticed something on the other side of the room, finding the scene all too familiar. He walked toward the object, and was only half-surprised, when the "Volcano God" didn't notice.

" **This is the day I get my sacrifice,** " the "god" continued, " **Therefore, if you are meant to be my sacrifice,** " Ford arrived in front of the maroon curtains, " **then you shall be my-** " Ford pulled back the curtain, much to the surprise of the scrawny fire-man behind it. The man stopped speaking into his microphone. His real voice was high and nasally. "-sacrifice…"

"Well, this is a _Wizard of Oz_ moment," Ford commented.

"What's going on?" Nadia asked, walking up to them.

The fire-man swallowed. "Uh…" He spoke into the microphone and drew the curtains. " **Pay no attention to the illusion behind the curtain!** "

Becoming increasingly irritated, Ford pulled back the curtain again. "Who are you, and what in Hell's name are you doing?"

"Um," the fire-man cleared his throat. "W-Well, I'm Volcan O. Godman."

" _You're_ the Volcano God?" Nadia asked incredulously.

Volcan laughed sheepishly and shrugged. "Well, that's what they call me. But, really I'm just a recluse who controls the volcano." He pulled back the panel on the wall behind him, revealing a screen of buttons and levers. "Pretty cool, right?"

"So…" Ford began, still processing this. "You're _not_ going to kill Nadia then?"

Volcan chuckled. "Of course not." Ford and Nadia sighed in relief. "I'm gonna kill both of you." He pressed a button on the panel, and the entire room started shaking.

Ford grabbed Nadia's wrist, and started running with her. "Let's get out of here!"

They raced out of the room and saw the stairs sink into the walls. They were trapped. Ford almost panicked, but then he saw the lava blast a large stone out of the volcano. It was risky, but…

"I have an idea," he announced, eyeing a stone that was rising fast. "On the count of three, we jump."

Nadia looked at him, like he was insane. "Um, do you have a backup plan?"

"Just do it!"

Nadia saw another stone fly out and instantly knew what he was thinking. "Oh, I get it now."

Just to be sure she would come with him, Ford took her hand. "One, two, _three_!"

They ran and leaped off the edge. They were airborne for barely a second, when they landed on top of a stone and were sent hurdling through the air, screaming from fear and adrenaline. When they reached the peak of their ascent, they gripped the stone as tightly as possible as they fell. Soon, they were riding down the mountain, like a huge water slide.

* * *

Tad and Starclops watched in confusion as the natives ran around in a panic. Starclops lowered herself to the ground and, after stumbling a bit, flew back up to Tad's side.

"Damn, that's some earthquake," she commented.

Chief ran up to them. It was the first time they had seen the man angry. "Your friends anger Volcano God! We live," he threw his fist into the palm of his other hand, "I tattoo their faces!" A huge glob of lava fell and just barely missed them. Chief ran away screaming.

They looked over to the erupting volcano in horror. Tad looked away. "Oh, this is bad!"

"Nadia! Ford!" Starclops remembered fearfully. "We gotta find them!"

She teleported away, much to Tad's chagrin. "Well, don't just me leave here!" He teleported too.

* * *

It didn't take long for the dream demons to find their friends. Although curious about why they were sliding down lava on a huge rock… Truthfully, they didn't really want to know.

"There you guys are," Starclops said instead as she and Tad floated near them. "Long story weird, I think the islanders hate you now, and we should get out of here."

"Hey, look!" Nadia exclaimed, pointing to a little white light not far from the volcano.

Ford noticed it too. "Is that a rift?"

"One way to find out. Lean!"

They leaned to the left, tilting and turning the stone toward the rift. They drew closer and closer...only to realize that the rift was suspended in the air.

"We're not gonna make it!" Ford exclaimed in horror.

A flare blasted up from far too close to Tad. "Oh, yes we are!" He levitated Ford and Nadia and sent them hurdling into the rift. "Let's get out of here!"

As he half-threw himself into the rift, Starclops muttered, "Ya didn't have to launch 'em like rocket ships," and followed.

* * *

The rift took them to world that looked like a flower garden threw up on another flower garden. The only colors Ford could see were white and varying shades of pink and purple. Upon exiting the rift, the four of them ended up sliding down an enormous purple flower petal, which was considerably more enjoyable than the lava.

When they reached the magenta-colored grass, Starclops generated Ford and Nadia some normal clothes. "I don't know what happened," the female demon commented, "and I'm pretty sure I don't want to."

Nadia bent her head and flailed her fingers through her hair, trying to get the ash out of it. Once finished, she lifted her head back up. "I'm just glad we didn't end up as sacrifices."

Ford brushed ash out of his hair. "I just wish I understood what happened." He noticed Tad taking several calming breaths. "You okay?"

Tad nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, I think so. Fire's just…" He shuddered.

Ford smiled comfortingly. "Hey, everyone's afraid of something, right?"

"Y-Yeah…"

Nadia arched her back. "Well, I don't know about anyone else, but I'm thoroughly exhausted. I say we rest for a while, before we jump into anymore adventures."

They all agreed.

* * *

 **I realize that was weird. To be fair, a lot of these will probably be weird. After, there will be many different dimensions showcased in this fic. Review!**

 **VFDUV DQG EXUQV. VFDUV DQG EXUQV. VFDUV DQG EXUQV.**


	7. Pet Peeved (Part One)

**Summary: An abused creature called a snark captures the hearts of Ford and Nadia, but the creature leads to some unexpected trouble. (Request from DelanaKiger)**

 **This request was actually pretty convenient, because I'd been pondering adding a snark (monster from _The Troop_ ) to the series.**

* * *

 **Chapter Six: Pet Peeved (Part One)**

The snark cringed as she felt the morning sun warm her face. She didn't want to wake up. She was still tired from her restless sleep. She sighed, deciding to let the sun win this round. She stood up on all fours and shook the dirt and debris from her fur. Thirsty, she crawled through the magenta-colored grass over to a nearby pond and lapped at the clear water. She then stood on her hind legs and looked sadly at her reflection.

The snow-white of her pelt was darkened from going too long without a decent bath, and that same grime made the pale gray stripes on her back look almost-black. Her long, normally fluffy tail was now matted down. Her tube-shaped ears sagged as she shook her head. She was a mess, and she could see her ribs. She needed to eat something. Fortunately, she was surrounded by plant-life.

...So, which plants were poisonous?

She knew what signs to look for in poisonous plants. The problem was that _all_ of these plants looked toxic. But, they couldn't _all_ be harmful, right? Bugs. She could eat bugs, too. Those tasted better than plants, anyway. A buzzing approached her; perfect timing. She watched as a big green insect flew obliviously towards her, its small wings flapping at impossible speeds. She whipped her tail at it, knocking to the ground in a daze. Her mouth watered. _Finally_ , some real food. She bent down to eat it.

Her black eyes caught sight of the orange excretion coming from the insect's mouth, and she jerked back. It was a bloric moth. Its excretion was _highly_ toxic. The snark looked frantically over her body and was relieved to see that she hadn't gotten any of the venom on her.

A smell bathed her small nostrils, a really good smell. Rumbling stomach leading the way, she followed the scent. It didn't take long for her to find the source of the aroma: lavender. A snark's favorite food. She quickly approached the violet plant.

Then, she heard footsteps. Really big footsteps. She froze, as a giant creature walked on its hind legs up to the flowers and knelt down in front of them. The snark gazed curiously at the creature; she had never seen one quite like it. It had pinkish flesh and was hairless, except for the top of its head, which had brown hair. It also had colored clothes, like the ones her old owner used to wear. It adjusted the round, transparent things on its face and picked one of the flowers with its six-fingered hand. It held the lavender up to the sunlight and examined it, cupping its chin with its other hand in thought.

"Can't possibly be lavender, can it?" the creature muttered.

She cringed when her traitorous belly growled even louder, which drew the attention of the big animal. It looked at her in surprise. She contemplated screaming, thus erasing its memory of seeing her.

The thing blinked. "A screech squirrel?"

Screech squirrel? What the heck was that? The _snark_ picked up a twig and wrote ' _snark'_ in the dirt, deciding that the animal seemed more curious about her than anything.

The thing stared at the writing for so long that she started thinking it couldn't read. Then its big blue eyes lit up in realization. "Oh, you're called a snark, then?" The snark nodded. "Wow, I was way off. Wait, you can write? And, you can understand me?" She nodded again. The creature grinned. "Remarkable. So, uh… What's your name?"

The snark nearly dropped the stick. Name? Did she have a name? What had her old master called her? Nothing nice, that was for sure. Her parents had probably called her something, but they had died when she was a baby. She didn't remember what they had called her.

The animal must have assumed she didn't understand. "Your name? Meaning, what do you call yourself to distinguish yourself from other snarks?"

She managed to stop herself from rolling her eyes. Instead, she shrugged and shook her head.

The animal's expression saddened. "Surely, you're called _something_? Or, there's something I could at least call you."

Another shrug. She wrote in the dirt, ' _You can name me, if you want.'_ It seemed weird to ask a total stranger to name her, but she didn't really know any names other than the profanities her old master used to call her. And, when he wasn't using those, he usually just called her 'snark,' which wasn't even a name.

The creature gained a thoughtful expression. "Please don't be offended, but are you a male or female? I-I honestly don't know what the difference is with snarks."

She nodded in understanding. ' _female'_

The thing stared at her, until she was incredibly uncomfortable. "If I recall correctly, your scream causes short-term memory loss, right?" She nodded, and it smiled. "Well then, how about, Echo? That seems like a good name for a snark."

She mulled it over. Echo… She liked the way that sounded. Echo smiled and nodded.

The animal smiled wider. "My name is Ford, and I'm the male of my species, which is a human." Echo's belly cried out again, and she covered it in embarrassment. Ford frowned. "I thought you seemed thin. Here." He placed the lavender in front of her. "Snarks eat plants, right?"

Echo nodded. She took a tentative sniff at the flower and glanced up at Ford, unsure of how sincere he was. He gestured to the flower, and Echo took as her cue to eat. So, she happily obliged.

* * *

"Why in Beelzebub's name would you bring that thing here?" a floating orange star asked. "Moreover, why would you let it ride on your head?"

Echo tried to bury herself in Ford's hair. When Ford had offered to introduce her to his friends, she hadn't expected such blunt judgement. The - what was it called again? - human was really nice to her, so she had assumed his friends would be, too.

"Because, I thought it was interesting that she could understand me," Ford said. "Although, ya got me on the head thing. She just sorta crawled up there." The reason she was on his head was because she had a better view from up there. "Besides, look at her. Poor thing's filthy and half-starved."

"Ya ain't planning on feeding that thing, are you?" the star continued, completely ignoring Ford's answer. "If you feed it, it'll just keep coming back."

A floating blue square smacked the star. "Starclops, have you no sympathy?" The star - Starclops - shrugged in response, and the square rolled its eyes. It floated closer to Echo, who leaned back instinctively. "So, Echo, right? She can understand us?" It seemed to be addressing Ford.

"Sure seems that way, Tad. She's certainly more intelligent than any other snark I've come across," Ford replied. "In fact, we were just having a pleasant conversation about politics. Did you know there's a guy here named Obarack Bama, who wants to conquer and destroy _my_ dimension? Crazy, right?"

A gray creature that was as tall as Ford's chin reached up and took Echo off of Ford's head, much to her surprise. "Poor thing," it said, gently petting her. Echo relaxed in its arms. Something about the creature was just...comforting. "Guys, we have to help her."

Starclops scoffed. "What is it with you people and 'helping?' Nadia helps Ford, Ford tries to help us, now you wanna help a snark. You guys would be a whole lot cooler, if you were more like me and just did your own thing."

The square - Tad - rolled its eyes again. "Please. We know you care about us."

The gray thing carried Echo away, as Starclops said, "Yeah, yeah, whatever."

Echo crawled on to the gray thing's head and watched Ford playfully shoved Starclops. Echo tilted her head. They were obviously _very_ different species, yet they seemed perfectly comfortable with each other. She tried to crawl down from the gray animal's head, but her tail was twisted among the tight coils of hair. She reached down and tried to untangle herself, careful not to pull the hair too much.

"Are you stuck?" the gray thing asked. Perhaps Echo hadn't been careful enough. "Sorry. I should have warned you." It laughed. "My hair kind of has a mind of its own." It stopped walking. "Whatever part's stuck, just yank on it. I've never been the girl who freaks out about her appearance, anyway."

Echo made a mental note that the gray creature was a female and yanked her tail loose, taking a chunk of black hair with it. She cringed in guilt, when the gray woman yelped. The woman picked Echo off her head and sat her at the base of the pond from earlier. She bent down in front of her and started unweaving the hair from the tail.

"I'm Nadia, by the way," the woman said. She got the hair untwisted and tossed it aside. "Don't worry about my hair. It's so kinky, no one's going to notice any missing. Now, let's get you cleaned up."

To Echo's surprise, Nadia dipped her in the shallow water and gently splashed some water on to her pelt. Even without soap, the grime from the snark's pelt was already starting to darken the water. Nadia picked a yellow flower from the ground and crushed in her four-fingered hand. "This is a trick I learned when I was eight and bored." Her hand glowed pale blue, and she raised it to her mouth and blew into it. A thin trail of smoke trickled out of her hand, which then glowed white. She opened her palm, revealing a cream-colored bar. "Instant soap! See what boredom can do?"

Echo stared in amazement.

Nadia rubbed the soap on the smaller creature, and Echo purred at how wonderful the grooming felt. After a few minutes, Nadia deemed her clean, and Echo stepped out of the pond and shook out her now-white fur. "That looks better," Nadia commented happily.

"Nadia," a deep voice called. Ford stepped out from some tall bushes, and Echo almost laughed at the small pink leaves that peppered his hair. "There you are." He walked up next to them and knelt down. "You sure have a habit of disappearing, don't you?" he joked. Then, he spotted the soap and pointed to it in confusion. "Where did you find soap?"

Nadia smiled and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "I'll show you later."

Ford then smiled down at Echo. "Well, you certainly look a lot better." Echo grinned and nodded. She _felt_ a lot better, too. Ford chuckled. Nadia brushed the leaves off of Ford's head. He raised an eyebrow at her. "What are you doing?"

"There were some leave stuck on your head," Nadia answered. She laughed. "You actually looked pretty adorable."

Ford's face turned red. Echo wondered how that was possible.

* * *

 **Trouble's on its way. Review!**

 **EHFDXVH HYHUB JURXS VKRXOG KDYH D ZDGGOHV.**


	8. Pet Peeved (Part Two)

**Summary: An abused creature called a snark captures the hearts of Ford and Nadia, but the creature leads to some unexpected trouble. (Request from DelanaKiger)**

* * *

 **Chapter Seven: Pet Peeved (Part Two)**

Bored out of her mind, Starclops cartwheeled through the air. Tad watched her boundless energy with envy. Sometimes, he wished he was that carefree. Unfortunately, he was cursed with a car _ing_ mindset. "Where do you suppose those guys wandered off to?" he asked, referring to Ford, Nadia, and Echo, who had yet to return from...wherever they went.

Starclops stopped spinning. "Well, Echo hopefully found a nice boy-snark to 'goof-off' with, and Ford and Nadia are probably bumping uglies even as we speak."

Tad shook his head, hardly surprised by his friend's response. "Star, you are probably the most perverted creature in the multiverse."

"That's because sex is hilarious!" She laughed. "But, seriously, Stranger, you need to loosen up. Why don't you spin around with me?" Tad rolled his eyes. "Ah, come on. You'll love it!" She twirled around once as an example. "It's easy for beings, like us, who can fly!" Tad had too much dignity to budge. "Do it! Do it! Do it!"

On the other hand, Starclops was more determined than most creatures he knew (just one more thing he admired about her). So, to appease her, he did a half-hearted aerial cartwheel.

Starclops clapped and cheered, "Yay! You're _not_ a total wuss! Do it again! This time with feeling!"

Tad laughed. Her enthusiasm was contagious, and he did a few more cartwheels. Starclops whooped and spun around with him. They twirled and laughed for a while, until Tad heard a faint buzz.

He stopped twirling. "Do you hear that?"

Starclops, however, kept playing and sang mockingly, "I hear wussing out!"

Okay, her random bouts of euphoria were cute, but this needed to stop for the time being. Tad grabbed the top of her head, pausing her little game. "Starclops. Listen."

The buzz was getting louder. The demons spotted a large group of flying bugs nearby, heading deeper into the forest.

Starclops laughed and poked her square friend. "You freaked out over some stupid bugs! Stop panicking and spin with me! Wheeeeee!" She cartwheeled away.

Tad just stared in the direction of the bugs, a strange sense of foreboding washing over him.

" _Doo doo doo_ ," Starclops sang. " _I'm still spinning_."

"Knock it off," Tad said, not really expecting her to listen.

Her response of "Never!" confirmed his suspicions.

* * *

Ford picked Echo up and stood up, Nadia following suit. "Well, we should probably head back," Ford said.

Nadia nodded. "Probably. Hey, do you hear, like, a million bugs?"

They turned around and gasped at the sight. Thousands of green bugs floated before them. Echo swallowed. She should have known better than to swat a bloric moth. She had been so hungry that she wasn't thinking straight.

"What-What are those things?" Ford wondered as Echo crawled on to his shoulder.

"I have no idea," Nadia replied. One of the moths spat out orange venom in front of them, and they took an instinctive step back. The venom sizzled, and the grass underneath disintegrated. Echo shivered. The moths attacked with more potent, acidic poison. "Whatever they are, we'd better get away from them!" Another splat of venom came dangerously close to her sneaker. "Run!"

They ran, the swarm of moths hot on their trail. Acid rained from the swarm.

"Why do we tick off something _every_ time we enter new dimensions!?" Ford wondered.

Echo bit her lip. This was _her_ fault. She had to do something, but what?

"It isn't usually this bad!" Nadia exclaimed. Ford cried out and collapsed. Echo fell off his shoulder, and Nadia raced to his side. "Ford! Ford, are you-" She gasped.

Ford's breathing sounded far too forced, and - Echo assumed this was some weird human function - water came out of his eyes. Echo stared in horror. Ford must have been hit by the acid, because the back of his leg had a gaping hole, revealing bone and letting off the stench of burnt flesh.

"I…" he wheezed. "It's...n-nothing…" He tried to stand up, screamed in pain, and toppled over again.

The moths surrounded them. Nadia held on to Ford, as if she thought she could protect him with her much smaller body. Pain from the acid left Ford with barely enough consciousness to hold her hand.

Then, Echo had an idea. At the risk of getting tangled again, Echo climbed on to Nadia's head and screamed. Ford and Nadia wouldn't lose their memories, because only creatures caught in the white light emitted from her eyes would forget. She spun slowly around, making sure to get all of the moths in her light. The insects wavered, after she stopped screaming. Then, they flew off in different directions, already forgetting why they were attacking.

Echo sighed in relief, while Nadia breathed, "They- What- Words...not working for mouth!"

Ford whimpered and started shivering, snapping Nadia out of her trance. His skin was ashen, and his exposed bone was turning black. Echo couldn't imagine how much pain he was in. Blinking back tears, Nadia gently laid Ford's head on the soft grass, and he cringed at the loss of her touch, which was the only thing that kept him from slipping into darkness. Echo hopped off her head and ran to Ford's face. Her heart snapped when she saw his formerly bright blue eyes slip in and out of focus. She instinctively tried to lick the water from his cheeks; it tasted salty. Ford somehow found the strength to smile the tiniest bit. Meanwhile, Nadia had placed her hands just above Ford's open wound and prayed that her healing abilities would work.

* * *

No matter how much Ford insisted that he was perfectly capable of walking, Nadia insisted on being his crutch. So, she led him back to their demon friends, his arm draped over her shoulders and her hand in his, holding it in place. Echo was perched on Ford's head, and she squeaked every time she thought Ford was in pain. Which was more often than he allowed himself to admit.

When they got back, naturally Tad was the first one to notice his limp. The square demon materialized in front of the fresh scar on the back of Ford's leg. "Whoa! What the heck happened?" he asked worriedly.

"We were attacked by some kind of acid-spitting insects," Ford answered.

Starclops floated around the three mortals frantically. "Are you guys okay? Did-Did acid get on anything else?" They smirked (Tad would have done the same, if he had a mouth). Starclops made a noise that sounded like throat-clearing. "N-Not that I care. Much."

Ford rolled his eyes and sat himself on top of a pale purple stone, happy to get some of the pressure off his leg. "We're fine, Starclops. Actually, we probably wouldn't be here right now, if it wasn't for Echo. You see, when a snark screams, it also emits a beam of light, and any being caught in said light suffers from short-term memory loss. The insects forgot what they were doing and left."

Echo proudly puffed out her chest, and Nadia patted her head.

"You really are something, aren't you?" the mutant commented.

"Don't think she's getting all the credit," Ford added. Nadia raised an eyebrow. "If it wasn't for you, I'd be missing a leg or dead or something."

Nadia shrugged sheepishly. "Your leg's not _completely_ healed-"

"But, it will be. Sure, the thing still hurts like hell, but, if you hadn't been there, well, I may have ended up being the freak with extra fingers _and_ a missing leg. I can't tell you how grateful I am, Nadia."

Nadia blushed.

Starclops cleared her throat again. "So, what are we gonna do with this thing?" she asked, pointing to Echo.

Ford reached up and let the snark hopped in his cupped hands. "Well, Nadia and I were actually talking to Echo about traveling with us. If that's okay with you guys."

Tad and Starclops glanced at each other. Starclops shrugged. "I hate admit it, but, if everything Fordsy's saying is true, that little squirt could come in handy."

Tad nodded. "Plus, she did save them. Apparently. Hey, we're game if Echo wants to hang with us."

Echo grinned and squeaked happily.

Starclops announced, "Let's find a rift right now!"

" _Or_ ," Tad interjected, "We could wait until Ford is fit to travel."

Ford waved off his concerns. "Oh, I'm fine." He tried to stand up, hissed in pain, and sat back down. "No, I'm not."

* * *

 **And, we have a new character! On a side note, I like the way they ended _Gravity Falls_. I mean, I don't like that they ended it, but it was a nice ending. Review!**

 **LPPXQH VBVWHPV ZHUHQ'W EXLOW WR ZLWKVWDQG WRALQV.**


	9. Mighty Falls (Part One)

**Summary: An encounter with a poisonous creature leaves Ford in a comatose state. When the gang take him to a hospital, the return of an old enemy further complicates matters. (Crossover with _Mighty Med_ )**

 **This takes place directly after "Pet Peeved," so I suggest you read that first. It's the episode right before this one.**

* * *

 **Chapter Eight: Mighty Falls (Part One)**

Morning came far too quickly, in Ford's opinion. The bushes in this dimension were actually more comfortable than any bed he'd ever slept in, but that wasn't what kept him from getting up. No, it was his leg that was the problem. It had only been a little sore yesterday, but now he felt like someone was shoving a sword through his injury. He forced himself to sit up and immediately regretted it. Despite his glasses, everything around him blurred, and he was so dizzy that he could barely hold on to his consciousness. After what felt like an eternity, the dizziness passed, and he could see clearly enough to check his leg. He grimaced. The scar had a dark blue ring surrounding it, and it throbbed at an impossible speed.

He didn't need a doctor to tell him that wasn't a good sign.

"Look who's up," Starclops commented. Ford started. He hadn't noticed that the she-demon was floating directly above him. She cringed when she saw his leg. "Yeesh! That doesn't look right!"

Nadia - who had been sitting against a tree, drawing her sketchbook - looked up. "What's wrong?"

Starclops motioned for her to come over. "Girl, you gotta see this."

Tad materialized next to them. "What's going- Whoa!" His brow furrowed in worry. "I wanna say that's infected, but Nadia healed you, so that should be impossible."

Nadia examined his leg in fear. "Oh, man. My-My powers have never done that before…"

Echo crawled up Ford's good leg, looked at the injury, and fell off in shock.

Not wanting them to worry about him, Ford waved off their concerns. "I-It's probably just a side effect of Nadia's abilities. If you recall, I've had an adverse reaction, before." Although, if he were completely honest, he strongly suspected that had been Bill's fault.

Tad shook his head. "I don't know, Ford. Maybe we should get a doctor to check you out."

Ford raised an eyebrow. "A doctor?" He spread out his arms and gazed pointedly around the dense forest. "And, just _where_ do you plan on finding one?"

Tad materialized a small metal cube. The symbol on it depicted a silver circle surrounding a red M with a smaller M underneath it. "We know a guy. He gave us this transportation device for if we ever needed to get to Mighty Med in a hurry. Or, if we ever felt like visiting."

"Mighty Med?"

"It's a hospital for superheroes. Although, I'm sure you could probably get checked out there, too. Our pal, Horace, runs the place."

Starclops crossed her arms and rolled her eye. "Uh, you mean _your_ pal, Horace. He's not _my_ friend."

"Why's that?" Ford asked out of curiosity.

Starclops shrugged. "Eh. Nothing big. Just a little disagreement. He loves bridges; I hate bridges. You know how that goes."

"Uh...I'm not entirely sure I do…"

Nadia cleared her throat. "Either way, we should go get that leg looked at, Ford."

"Really, guys, I'm fine," Ford lied. "I probably just need to walk it off." He stood up, and his head swam, his knees buckled, and his entire being felt like fire. He forced himself to breathe.

"Ford!" his friends cried out in shock (except Echo, who squeaked).

Having seen enough, Starclops swiped the metal cube from Tad. "Bridges or no bridges, we're going to Mighty Med!"

She pressed the symbol, and the gang were transported in a large blue vortex.

* * *

Mighty Med was just like any other hospital but with superheroes as patients. Used to strange occurrences, no one so much as blinked when the gang materialized in the reception area, which was also used to treat the less serious injuries and diseases. Grabbing the desk for support, Ford groaned as he forced himself to stand.

"Ford, you shouldn't strain yourself," Tad advised.

"I told you," Ford rasped. He cleared his throat. "I'm fine."

Nadia spotted a middle-aged doctor with gray-brown hair and a goatee. She waved him over. "Horace! We need your help!"

Horace saw her and grinned, heading towards them. "Nadia, Tad, welcome back!" He scowled. "Oh, Little Miss I-Hate-Bridges is with you."

Starclops groaned and rolled her eye. "Ugh. _Horace_."

Then, Horace spotted Echo, and picked her up off the floor. "And, you have a snark! Why, I love these little critters almost as much as I love bridges!" Then, he spotted a man he didn't recognize and sat the snark on the counter. "Greetings, new person." He held out his hand. "I'm Dr. Horace Diaz, head doctor of this hospital."

Ford shook his hand. "I'm Dr. Stanford Pines. Not a medical doctor. A scientist. You can call me Ford, by the way."

Horace let go. "Pleased to meet you, Fordbytheway."

"Uh, actually-"

"So, what kind of superpowers do you have?"

Ford opened his mouth, but Starclops answered for him. "He's not a superhero, genius. He's a normo."

Normo was the superheroes' word for human. Horace's smile never wavered. "A normo, huh? Interesting." He called over a bald man with an enlarged head. "Philip, take this man, and have him cubed." His eyes lit up as another idea came to him. "Or, we could make him into a paperweight!"

They stared incredulously. Ford blinked, hoping he'd misunderstood. "E-Excuse me!?"

"Horace, Ford's our friend," Nadia protested. "And, anyway, he needs medical attention!"

Horace thought it over. "Hm… I don't know. I really need a new paperweight…"

"Why do you want to, uh, do whatever that is, anyway?" Ford asked, trying to ignore the sudden numbness in both of his legs and the realization that the desk was the only thing keeping him upright.

Horace shrugged, like the answer was obvious. "You don't honestly expect us to let normos know of the existence of superheroes, do you?"

"On the contrary, I've known of the existence of superheroes for a while, now." Ford recalled meeting a rather adorable group of super-human little girls not long before what he had dubbed "the portal incident."

"Seriously?" Horace asked in surprise. "In that case, we _really_ need to get you cubed. Or, paperweighted. I wonder if we could do both…"

Ford couldn't argue, because suddenly the numbness spread to his waist. He would have collapsed, if Nadia hadn't caught him at the last minute. Dots covered his vision, and they looked a little too much like eyes. He couldn't even hear himself mutter, "Eloo Flskhu. Wuldqjoh."

Horace frowned in disappointment. "Nevermind. He looks ready to die, anyway." The healthy beings gaped. (Well, Tad and Starclops would have, if they had mouths.) "Kind of a shame. A six-fingered normo would've made a really nice paperweight."

" _Horace Diaz_!" Nadia snapped.

Horace raised his hands in defense. "I'm sorry, but you know we only treat superheroes here."

"Come on, Horace," Tad argued. "Can't you at least check him out?"

Ford shook his head clear and managed to stand up on his own, but Nadia kept her hands on his shoulders, just in case. Not that Ford minded.

Normally, Horace wouldn't associate with normos, but this one was friends with Tad and Nadia. Plus, there was just something...unusual about him, besides the extra fingers. The doctor couldn't place it, but he knew that this normo was far different from other ones.

"Very well," Horace said. He gestured to the gurney nearby. "Fordbytheway-"

"I-It's just Ford," Ford corrected.

"Perch yourself on that gurney, and I'll take a look."

Walking slowly - his legs felt heavy - Ford only made it halfway to the gurney before blacking out and falling to the floor.

His friends gasped, and Starclops levitated him on to the gurney. Horace raced to his side and noticed a mark on the back of his torn pants. He pulled up the pant leg, giving him full view of the scar. And, the black skin surrounding it.

He stepped back. "Philip, get him into the ER immediately." Philip nodded and rolled the normo away. Horace turned to the frightened group. "I think I know what's wrong with Ford. Has he come into contact with any bugs, recently?"

Echo shrank back.

Nadia paled. "We-We were attacked by some acid-spitting bugs."

Dread wedged its way in Horace's stomach, but he wouldn't show it. "Were they green with tiny wings?"

"Y-Yeah…"

"She said nervously," Starclops quipped. Tad smacked her.

Horace ignored the demons. "That bug is called a bloric moth. Very aggressive and even more poisonous."

Nadia swallowed. "But-But, I used my powers to heal him."

"Your powers _can_ heal injuries, but as far as the venom is concerned, all you've managed to do was slow down the effects."

"But, you _can_ help Ford," Tad clarified, "right?"

Horace frowned. "Well, there's one small hiccup." He hiccuped. "That's better. Now, I'll do what I can for Ford, but the medicines and equipment here weren't designed for the treatment of normos, so I can't make any promises."

* * *

Nadia paced just outside of Ford's room, too nervous to sit down. The demons had assured her that this wasn't her fault, but that didn't stop her from worrying. And, she wasn't the only one. Tad wouldn't stop staring at the door, Starclops - airborne - was sitting cross-legged and anxiously tapping her knee, and Echo was curled in a tight ball on a chair.

After what felt like decades, Horace stepped out of the room, and they gathered around him. He cleared his throat. "I have good news and bad news. The good news is," he grinned and pulled a photograph out of his lab coat pocket, "I found my favorite bridge-photo! _I love bridges_!"

"Ugh," Starclops rolled her eye, "this guy."

Tad ignored the "good news." "Well, we're just glad you know how to cure Ford."

Horace's face fell. "Yeah, uh, one small hiccup."

Starclops narrowed her eye. "Well, hiccup already."

"What? No, I mean I'm going to tell you the bad news," Horace corrected. "It's just a figure of speech, Starclops."

Nadia asked, "So, what's the bad news?"

"It's this: I don't know how to cure Ford."

" _What_!?" the group cried out.

Horace's frown deepened. Here came the hardest part of his job. "I told you, this hospital wasn't designed for the treatment of normos. I think I've managed to delude the poison, but it's still pretty potent, and I'm...not sure a normo, like him, could survive."

Nadia swallowed tears and a growing sense of fear. "I-Is he awake?"

"No. But, some studies show that a comatose patient is more likely to come to, if he hears familiar voices. He _might_ respond, if you talk to or near him, but don't get your hopes up." Horace picked Echo up off the chair. "On an unrelated note, I'm going to borrow this snark for a while. A patient needs an antidote that requires snark-saliva to make. Also, I really like snarks. While I'm gone, I'll look over the results of Ford's tests and see if there's anything else I can do."

Tad sighed. "Just do what you need to do."

Horace nodded and left with Echo.

The three of them cautiously entered Ford's room and were speechless at what they found. The human could have been mistaken as asleep, but he was wearing a baby-blue hospital gown, he was so pale that he was almost white, and there were purple splotches covering his skin. There was also an IV in his arm.

"He'll be fine," Starclops said without conviction.

The demons floated closer to the body, and Nadia followed on jelly-like legs.

"Ford?" Tad said. "I don't know if you can hear us, but we're Tad, Starclops, and Nadia."

Nadia tried - and failed - to keep her voice from wobbling, as she sat in a nearby chair. "You're in good hands, Ford."

Starclops nodded. "Yeah, so don't worry your dorky little head. Also, I feel like I'm speaking to a corpse." The other two glared daggers at her. "Too soon? Too soon. Got it." They were silent for a moment, not sure what else to say, then the she-demon snapped her fingers, and a light bulb appeared briefly over her head. "Light bulb! Tad, maybe we should try entering his mind. If talking supposedly helps, maybe going directing into his mind will help even more."

Tad rubbed the chin he didn't have in thought. "That's not a bad idea. Maybe then we could find a way to fix him."

"I don't understand your logic," Nadia commented, "but we might not have a choice."

"Keep talking to him," Tad instructed. "We'll be out as soon as we can."

The demons shrank into tiny blue and orange lights and phased into Ford's head. His forehead glowed, and the light left as quickly as it came.

* * *

Tad and Starclops had been in Ford's mind for a while, and Nadia was quickly losing hope. She talked about anything she could think of, sometimes just commenting on the color of the walls or some other random thing. But, Ford wouldn't respond to anything. It really _was_ like talking to a corpse.

Were those splotches getting darker? Nadia bent down beside him for a closer look. They _were_ getting darker, and the beeping of the heart rate monitor was getting slower. Nadia's eyes burned. Ford was dying.

"F-Ford?" she said. "Ford? Can you hear me?" She held his hand with both of her much smaller ones, as water starting dripping down her face. "Please, Ford. I d-don't want you to die. Come on, _please_." The only response was the beeping getting impossibly slow. Nadia cried harder. It was over. He was going to die, and she couldn't do a thing about it. "There-" she drew a sharp breath, determined to compose herself for Ford. "There has to be _someone_ who can help you…"

Suddenly, the lights flickered, and she seemed to be the only thing in the room that _hadn't_ lost all color. Nadia watched in confusion, as one of the ceiling lights turned and shined on the wall. The circular light shifted into a triangle. A single eye appeared in the center of the light. In blinding flash, the triangle turned yellow and gained a top hat, a bowtie, arms, legs, and a brick-pattern on its bottom half.

It spoke with a high voice, but it still sounded male. "I _think_ I know a guy!"

* * *

 **I'll give you one guess... Review!**

 **Also, to Guest: When you typed, "But, are you gonna make so they come with, or...?" what exactly did you mean? I didn't quite understand.**

 **KH ORYHV EULGJHV!**


	10. Mighty Falls (Part Two)

**Summary:** **An encounter with a poisonous creature leaves Ford in a comatose state. When the gang take him to a hospital, the return of an old enemy further complicates matters. (Crossover with _Mighty Med_ )**

* * *

 **Chapter Nine: Mighty Falls (Part Two)**

"Well, well, well," the triangle said as it floated closer to her. "What a touching scene. I'd cry, if I was physically capable."

Nadia stood up and stared in horror at the creature. He was obviously a dream demon, but there was such an eerie aura about him that it gave her chills. "Who-Who are you?"

The triangle tipped his hat. "Name's Bill Cipher. And, yours is Nadia Adaleen Blackburne, and the near-dead guy is Stanford Philbrick Pines."

Nadia's blood froze. "You're Bill Cipher? My friends told me about you! You're a monster!"

Bill didn't sound the least bit hurt, when he replied, "Yeesh! You ladies really know how to hurt a guy, don't you?"

"What do you want, Bill?"

Nadia flinched, when Bill materialized behind her. "This isn't about what _I_ want. This is about what," he knocked on her head with his fist, " _you_ want." He did an aerial backflip and floated over Ford. Bill returned color to the human's body. "And, what you want, is this six-fingered nerd over here to recover. Lucky for you, I will gladly make sure he does just that."

"Will you, now?" Nadia asked skeptically.

"Absolutely! All I ask is that you do a little something for me."

Nadia glared. Did he think she was stupid? "There is no way I'm helping you with _anything_!"

Bill rolled his eye. "Ah, women. Can't live with 'em; can't get them to do simple things for ya." He shrugged. "Well, if you change your mind, I'll be ready. Ready to make a _deal_! By the way, if I were you I'd start running for that trash can just outside of the room."

* * *

Nadia's eyes flew open. Color had returned to the room, and Bill was nowhere in sight. She charged out of room, found the trash can Bill had mentioned, and threw up in it. She lifted her head up, silently cursing Bill.

"Hey, are you okay?" a voice asked from behind her. "Uh, sorry. Stupid question."

Nadia turned around, confident that she was physically stable. The voice had come from a teenage girl in a pink and black superhero suit. She was pretty and had long brown hair with a pink streak.

Nadia licked her lips. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" The girl asked, worried. "'Cause, it kinda looks like you just finished puking. Or, do your kind just like making retching sounds in trash cans?" Nadia narrowed her eyes, and the girl raised her hands in defense. "I'm not trying to be rude. I just have no idea whatsoever."

Nadia sighed. "You got me. But, I'm okay now. I'm Nadia."

The girl smiled. "Skylar Storm. Are you a superhero, too?"

"Nah," Nadia gestured to Ford's room. "I just brought my friend here."

Skylar looked in the room - the door was still open - and grimaced. "Yikes! He looks pretty dead." The mutant scowled. "Sorry."

"So," Nadia suppressed an eye roll, "why are you here?"

Now, Skylar scowled. "Ah, my nemesis, The Annihilator, took away my powers." She smiled suddenly. "Unless… Skylar, be gone!" She spun around a few times. Nadia just stared at her, and Skylar frowned. "You can still see me, can't you?"

"Yep."

"Dang it. I used to have the power to turn invisible."

* * *

In general, most mindscapes were rather creepy-looking. Dark colors all around, and some minds - excluding memories - were only in black and white. Ford's was one of them. Tad and Starclops seemed to be the only specks of color. Then, they as flew around the Hall of Memories, they spotted a green shape.

Starclops pointed to it. "That looks like one of those bug-things!"

"Maybe if we can get rid of it, then Ford will wake up," Tad suggested.

"You really think that'll work?"

"Couldn't hurt to try."

"Good enough for me."

The bug phased through one of the doors. Tad opened the door to follow it, but he noticed that Starclops wasn't moving. "Coming, Starclops?"

"Did you see the label?" Starclops asked in a small voice.

Tad grew more worried. It wasn't like Starclops to not want to jump into everything potentially dangerous. He looked at the door's label: "Bill Cipher Memories." Well, that explained her hesitance, but it didn't explain how upset she looked. Was she afraid of Bill? If so, Tad couldn't blame her. The lights dimmed. Ford was fading fast. They needed to hurry.

"Why don't I go in alone?" Tad suggested. "You wait out here, and call me if the moth sneaks out."

Starclops looked immensely grateful. "You can count on me."

Tad flew through the door and searched the hallway it led to. He opened several doors and was saddened by all of Ford's memories of Bill. Saccharine words, seemingly unbreakable trust, sleepless nights, fear of being followed. Tad shook his head as he closed the door to a memory of them making blueprints for (probably) the portal Ford had mentioned. It was no wonder the human was so hesitant to trust Tad and Starclops. A soft buzz drew his attention away from his musings. The moth was crouched in a corner of the ceiling. It spotted him and darted away. Man, that thing was fast.

* * *

Starclops tapped her foot impatiently. Beelzebub, she hated waiting. She briefly considered going in after Tad, but she _really_ didn't want to see how badly Bill had messed up Ford.

Then, one section of Ford's mind went black.

Oh, _shit_ , that could only mean one thing…

Anxiety replaced with genuine fear, Starclops half-threw herself into the room, called for her Tad. She found him chasing after the moth and grabbed his arm. Ignoring his shocked expression, she shook his shoulders. "Tad! Ford's mind's going black!"

Tad's surprise was quickly replaced with terror. "W-What!?"

"You heard me! If we don't get out of here, we'll disappear right along with him! Come on!" They raced out of the room, retracing their steps until they found the exit.

* * *

The beeping in the room got spontaneously fast. Too fast. Both girls forgot their conversation. Skylar ran to find Horace, and Nadia ran back to Ford's side.

"Ford? Ford!?" the mutant cried out. "Ford, wake up! _Ford_!" The heart monitor went still. So did Nadia's own heartbeat. "F-Ford?" she squeaked. No, no, _no_ , there was no way. He wasn't dead. He couldn't be… She desperately grabbed and shook the corpses shoulders, tears running down her face. "Ford! Say something! _Fo-ord_!"

Suddenly, a blinding flash filled the room. When it dimmed, everything was in black and white, except for Nadia and Bill, who had appeared above Ford's body. "Well, well, well," the demon said. "Someone's looking desperate."

Nadia sniffed and wiped her eyes. "Now's not the time, Bill."

"I can revive him, Nadia. You just need to hear out my demands."

She tried in vain to push down the hope that rose at his words. "Why should I trust you?"

Bill chuckled. "Here's a little something you don't know about dream demons: if a person dies while they're in his mind, then _said demons_ ," he conjured two little white shapes - a star and a square - for emphasis, "disappear forever, if they don't get out shortly after the death." The shapes vanished in a bright red flame. Nadia thought she might throw up again. "In other words, either you and I strike a deal, or your little friends are gonners."

Nadia balled her fists at her sides in frustration. After what her friends had told her, she knew that she shouldn't trust Bill. But, if there was even a chance… She sighed. "What do you want?"

Bill laughed. "You make it sound like I'm gonna physically rape you. I'll save your friends, Nadia. All I ask is that you help me with a little project I've been working on."

"What kind of project?"

Bill pretended to ponder telling her. "Hm… Normally, I wouldn't give anything away, but you're pals with Starclops, so what the heck!"

Nadia blinked in surprise. "You know Starclops?"

"Here's the thing; I've been working on a new type of dream manipulation, and I'm going to need someone to try it out on."

"So, you want me to be your test subject?" Nadia glanced down at Ford's black-and-white form.

Bill's hand became engulfed in a blue flame, and he held it out to her. "Do we have a _deal_?"

On one hand, Nadia had no idea what exactly Bill had in mind. On the other hand… "You'll save them, if I let you manipulate my dreams?"

"You have my word. Just shake my hand, and the deal is set."

Hesitantly, despite not having a better idea, Nadia shook his hand, surprised that she didn't feel any pain from the flame.

The fire disappeared, as Bill retracted his hand. "Welp, time to bring ol' Six Fingers back to life. This should be fun!" Just before he disappeared in another flash of light, he called out, "Remember: Apollo11WasAHoaxTheGovernmentIsRunByLizardPeopleWearSunscreen! Byyyyyyyyyyyyeeeeee!"

* * *

Nadia blinked and shook her head clear. Color had returned to the room. Before she could fully process what had just happened, the heart monitor's beeping started up- No, it skyrocketed. Ford's entire being glowed blue and thrashed wildly, and the human started yelling as though in pain. Nadia shrunk back in horror. Dear Lord, what had she done? The atmosphere itself seemed to ripple, as Tad and Starclops, screaming, shot out of Ford's mind and crashed into ceiling. Ford's body returned to normal, as did his heart rate. Part of Nadia was relieved; the other part was petrified.

"What hell just happened?" Starclops wondered, as she and Tad floated down toward their friends.

Tad rubbed his head and groaned. "It-It was like something shoved us out of Ford's mind. I'm grateful, but it was still weird. Even for our standards." Then, he noticed how pale Nadia was and how badly she was shaking. "Hey, at the risk of asking a stupid question, are you alright?"

Nadia breathed deeply, trying to steady her erratic heartbeat. "J-Just startled…" She wished she was better at lying.

Ford grunted and slowly opened his eyes. Nadia recoiled. She could have sworn… No, his eyes were blue. They looked yellow for a moment, but they were blue again. Maybe, she'd imagined it.

Ford coughed loudly into his fist. "G-G-Guys?" He slowly sat up and coughed a few more times. "What-What happened?"

Everything Bill-related left Nadia's mind, as she threw her arms around him, crying with relief. Ford tensed in surprise then returned her embrace.

* * *

The antidote had been made, and the patient had been cured, so Horace decided to check Ford's test results. He walked into his office and logged onto his computer. After a quick scroll-

Horace reread the computer screen.

And, reread it again.

"I don't believe it…" he breathed. "This hasn't happened in centuries…"

Horace was still gawking at the computer screen, when Skylar found him. "Horace," she said urgently, "something's wrong with Nadia's friend! I mean, besides the thing that made him look dead."

But, Horace wasn't listening. "Ford's a Protector," he confirmed in awe.

That caught Skylar's attention. "Protector?" Horace blinked and looked at her, as though he had just realized that she was there. "I thought Protectors were a myth."

"They're not a myth, Skylar," Horace confirmed. "They're just very, _very_ rare."

"Do-Do you think he knows?"

"Hard to say."

Philip walked in, carrying Echo. "Uh, Horace you left this snark in the medical lab."

Horace shooed him away. "Not now, Philip! We are in the middle of an _extremely_ important discussion!" Philip rolled his eyes, sat Echo on the desk, and left the room. "We need to tell him and his friends _immediately_!" He slammed down on the desk for emphasis...but accidentally slammed down on Echo's tail. The snark screamed in pain, inadvertently engulfing Horace and Skylar in a memory-erasing light. They both went slack-jawed and their eyes glowed momentarily. They blinked and shook their heads clear. "What were we talking about?"

Skylar scratched her head in thought. "I...don't remember."

Horace shrugged. "Well, if it was important, we probably wouldn't have forgotten. Since you're here, Skylar, have any of your powers come back, yet?"

"Hm…" Skylar raised her hand toward the wall. "Explode!"

Horace tilted his head. "Uh, was something supposed to explode?"

"Dang it."

* * *

Later, Horace was amazed to see that Ford had made a full recovery but had decided to keep him there overnight, just in case. He had informed the others that they could stay in some of the empty rooms.

Tad shook his head in disbelief. "I don't know how you did it, Ford."

Ford shrugged, as Echo crawled happily on top of his head. "I guess I'm just lucky."

Nadia didn't comment. She was too afraid of what she might end up saying.

Horace finished checking over his test results - the paper ones that had only basic information - and said, "But, I feel like there's something I'm forgetting."

"You probably forgot where you put your brain," Starclops quipped.

Horace glared at her. "I detest you, Starclops."

"I assure you, the feeling's mutual."

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 **And, thus, the deal's been made. Review!**


	11. The Fourth Journal

**This is a little break in between episodes. It's basically Ford starting...a whole new journal! :D It's his analysis of the main OCs, as well as a little memory-jogger for you guys. I might start doing this kind of thing every now and then. Perhaps, to show a time-skip.**

 **Perhaps, when something important is coming up... *hint hint***

* * *

 **Chapter Ten: The Fourth Journal**

 _I don't know how long I've been away from Earth. Could have been a few days, weeks. Heck,_ years _could have gone by, for all I know. Different dimensions have different time zones (I assume), so it's basically impossible to keep track._

 _Tad gave me this journal today. I told the guys about how I used to document the anomalies in Gravity Falls in journals, so he thought I would like to do the same as I hopped through dimensions. I'm can't express how grateful I am. It's like having a little piece of home with me. This thing even looks like my old journals but with a "4" on the cover. He must have looked inside my mind at some point and saw the other three volumes. I'm a little ticked that he didn't ask to do so, but my mind seems to be functioning properly, so I'll allow it. Just this once._

 _I suppose I'll start by discussing my new friends. That way I can properly analyze exactly who I'm traveling with. There's no one you can trust in Gravity Falls, and that goes double for all these dimensions. Of course, that's probably because I know next to nothing about them._

 _Tad Strange seems to be the most down-to-earth of the group, despite being a dream demon. That fact seems a little odd to me. Admittedly, including him, I've only met three dream demons, but Tad almost seems_ too _sane. Maybe I'm just biased or paranoid or both, but I can't help but feel as though there's something he isn't telling me. One reason I feel this way is because of his apparent pyrophobia. It sounds like a perfectly normal fear, but fire-conjuring is the primary ability of his kind. Definitely something to think about._

 _Starclops is pretty much what you would expect out of a dream demon: loud, bubbly, bizarre sense of humor. (I believe her exact words were, "Sex is hilarious!") She is a little like a girl-Bill and a little like a demonic girl-version of Stanley, which was unnerving at first. It still is, but I've gotten used to it. Heck, I've even managed to get a few laughs out of her shenanigans. Plus, she seems surprisingly loyal. Although, I have noticed something a bit peculiar. Every time someone mentions Bill Cipher, she gets annoyed and blatantly changes the subject. I, of all people, can understand not wanting to speak of Bill, but Starclops seems to hold a different sort of dislike than me. I can't quite explain it, but I think she knows more about Bill than she's letting on._

 _Echo is pretty intelligent. Every other snark I've come across had the IQ of an ordinary squirrel, but Echo is borderline anthropomorphic. Well, intelligence-wise, anyway. Perhaps it's because of the difference in environments. Or, maybe she is a different breed. She_ is _the first white-furred snark I've seen, but who can say? It's hard to do a proper analysis of a creature who isn't physically capable of speaking, but it's pretty clear that she's a good...person? Animal? I don't know. Could be something else entirely. Although, I do recall my first meeting with her. Poor thing was filthy and half-starved. I can't help but wonder how she ended up that way._

 _And, then there's Nadia. She has to be the sweetest and most selfless person I know. She actually saved my life - the life of a total stranger - the day we met. How many creatures would do that? I know not a lot of humans would. Not sure if I would. Out of all my new companions, she has to be the one I trust the most. If I had to say one negative thing about her, it would have to be the way my body has been acting around her. Every now and then, when I'm near her, my pulse speeds up, and my stomach feels… Well, I don't really feel sick, but my stomach does feel a bit different. It's not a bad feeling, but it is rather unusual. Perhaps she gives off some kind of weird pheromone or something. Maybe I'll ask later._

 _I am worried about her, though. Starclops tells me that Nadia's suffered from night terrors since she was a kid, but Starclops also said that they never used to be this frequent. Tad and Starclops offered to enter her mind and see if they could help, but she rejected the idea. And, by rejected, I mean she did a poor job of trying to cover up how terrified she was at the idea. I'm not even sure if she's been sleeping. It reminds me how I was when I realized that Bill was evil. I hope I'm just overanalyzing this. For all I know, periods just affect mutants differently. Or, maybe they don't, and Mom just wasn't as bothered by them. Who knows?_

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 **And, there you have it! I might start putting journal entries in the beginnings of episodes. Or, maybe I won't. I'm definitely going to fit these in, though.**

 **Review!**


	12. Mind Games (Part One)

**Summary: Nadia becomes paranoid and delusional, and her friends fear for her sanity. Later, Starclops encounters an old flame.**

 **This was going to be a Fordia (FordXNadia) one-shot...until the Starclops idea came to me. All caps means Bill's deep voice.**

 **Warning: Feels! So many feels!**

 **Trigger Warning: Panic attacks and hallucinations, but they're both pretty brief.**

* * *

 **Chapter Eleven: Mind Games (Part One)**

 _They were both silent, as they walked through the forest together. Ford walked slowly and had a deep frown on his face. Nadia wondered what was wrong. He had said that he wanted to talk to her alone, and the topic of discussion must not have been anything good. He stopped so suddenly that Nadia almost bumped into him._

" _Nadia," he began. "Now that we're alone...there's something we need to discuss."_

 _Nadia blinked. Ford hadn't been this formal with her since the day they met. "Is everything okay?"_

 _When he turned around, his eyes were covered by the glare of the sunlight. He smirked, and something about that look sent chills down Nadia's spine. "Well, that depends on who you ask. For me, everything's great. But, for you..."_

 _He laughed, and it became increasingly louder and high-pitched. Nadia went from disturbed to terrified, when Ford took off his glasses. Those weren't the bright blue eyes she liked so much._

 _His eyes were yellow, and his pupils were slits._

" _What the!?" Nadia cried out._

 _Ford's body levitated. He glowed yellow and morphed into a triangle. In a blinding shimmer, "Ford" became another creature._

" _Oh, man!" Bill laughed. "Your face, right now! Priceless!"_

 _Nadia stared in horror. "Bill? What are doing here? Why are you_ always _here?"_

 _Bill materialized next to her. "It's all part of our little deal. I saved Sixer's butt. Now, I get to manipulate your dreams."_

" _You've_ been _doing that!" Nadia protested. "Haven't you done it enough?"_

 _Bill laughed. It was getting to be a really annoying sound. "Oh, you sweet little mutant. This is the only dream of yours I've actually entered. Those me's in your other nightmares were just a product of your own paranoia. I tend to have that effect on people." He ruffled her hair. "Although, I'd be lying, if I said that I didn't have_ any _influence."_

 _Nadia took a few steps away from him, ready to bolt the first chance she got. "Why are you here, Bill?"_

 _Bill waved dismissively. "Oh, I just thought I'd update you on the whole dream manipulation thing. Like I said, I've been working on a new style of it. I'm getting pretty good, but I'm not quite ready to test it out on someone. But, mark my words, Nadia Blackburne, I'll be ready soon enough. Just...you...WAIT."_

 _Bill disappeared. The windstorm came in his place, but Nadia somehow avoided getting blown away. Debris flew around her, scratching and bruising her body. Bill's insane laughter echoed in her ears. She dropped to her knees and held her hands over her ears in a pathetic attempt to block it out._

" _Stop it!" She sobbed. "Stop laughing at me!" Was someone calling her name? The voice was a lot deeper than Bill's. "Please! Stop! Stop it! Leave me alone!"_

* * *

" _Stop it_! _Stop it_!" Nadia shot up from her sleeping bag. It was still dark out. Two hands gripped her shoulders, and she stared into panicked blue eyes.

"It's okay, Nadia," Ford said gently. He must have been the one calling her. "You were having a nightmare, but you're okay now."

Nadia blinked back tears and saw that Ford's expression was mirrored on Tad's, Starclops's, and Echo's faces. She breathed deeply, trying to calm down for their sakes. But, what if this was another trick? Nadia reached into the startled human's trench coat, and pulled out a small flashlight. She lifted Ford's glasses and, ignoring his confused protests, shined the light in his eyes.

She turned off the flashlight and handed it back to him, sighing in relief. "Your eyes are blue."

Ford looked even more puzzled as he readjusted his glasses. Then his face became more distant, the way it got when he was thinking hard about something.

"Yes, his eyes are blue," Starclops stated bluntly. "And, yours are purple. And, mine, Tad's and Echo's are black. Are we done pointing out the obvious now? 'Cause I'd really like to know what that flashlight-thing was about."

Nadia swallowed thickly.

Tad rested his arm comfortingly around her shoulders. "Nadia, what's been going on with you? Ever since Ford recovered from that poison, you've been having a lot more nightmares. And, we can tell how upset you are."

"Are you _sure_ you don't want us to check out your mind and see if we can help?" Starclops offered.

And, the fear came rushing back. "No!" Nadia almost-yelled, startling her friends. "No, don't! _Please_!"

They all exchanged frightened looks. Tad was the first to speak. "Okay. We'll stay out of your mind, but you have to tell us what's going on. This whole nightmare-thing is getting out of hand."

"He's right, girl," Starclops said gently. "A couple of bad dreams is normal for you, but this is crazy. You know I'm not the type get serious, but I'm serious now. I want- _We_ want you to tell us what's going on."

Nadia considered telling them about Bill, but another voice came to her.

" _Yeah, Nadia, tell them!"_ Was that Bill? Or, was she just crazy? " _Tell them all about our little deal! Tell them what a fool you were to trust me, and how I'm tearing apart your mind, solely because it's fun to watch people go insane!"_

"No…" Nadia breathed. She shut her eyes, tears threatening to escape, and covered her ears with her hands. She could still hear that laughter. That loud, fucking _laughter_! "No, stop it…"

Her hands were removed from her head, and she opened her eyes. Ford looked heartbroken as he held her hands. "Nadia, look at me." Watery violet eyes met ocean-blue ones, as Nadia did what she was told. "You can tell us anything, Nadia. You need to believe that. Even, if you don't think we'll understand, we'll still be here for you." Suddenly, Nadia's heart was pounding for a different reason.

" _This scene is adorable!"_ Then, Bill materialized behind Ford, and Nadia remembered to be scared. " _Over here, Nadia!"_ Bill waved happily. " _Your friends can't see or hear me, 'cause I'm a figment of your imagination!"_

"Nadia, calm down," Tad said. Nadia hadn't realized that she was crying again.

" _I'm everywhere at once!"_

Ford soothingly brushed her wiry hair from her face. "It's okay, Nadia."

No, it wasn't.

" _I could be in your tonsils, right now!"_

Echo crawled into her lap and nuzzled her comfortingly.

Starclops said to Tad, "I still think we should enter her mind."

" _I'm warning you, Nadia. Once I make a deal, I ALWAYS follow through with it!"_

Echo flopped unceremoniously to the ground, as Nadia leaped to her feet and ran off, sobbing. Her friends called for her, but she wasn't listening. She just needed to get away from _him_.

* * *

Ford stood up, preparing to go after Nadia, but a small hand on his shoulder stopped him. "Let her go, Ford," Tad said sadly. "She clearly needs space."

Starclops clenched her fists and groaned in frustration. " _Ugh_! This is so dumb! Nadia's freaking out, and we don't have any idea why!" Then she glanced at Ford. "Hey, I know that look. That's your thinking-look."

Ford stopped listening. Nadia had shined a light into his eyes. That was an easy way to identify a possession. It _couldn't_ have been a coincidence, could it?

Echo squeaked and dragged Nadia's sketchbook to them.

"Echo," Starclops snapped, "now is not the time for doodling!"

"No, I see where she's going with this." Ford bent down and picked up the book. "Nadia once told me that art was a way to let out your emotions. And, I've noticed that she's been drawing a lot more, lately. Perhaps, looking at her drawings will give us a clue about what's been going on with her."

Echo nodded in agreement.

As Ford starting flipping through the book, Tad said, "So, are any of you guys skilled in psychology?"

Starclops scoffed. "Aren't psychologists just dudes who get paid to sit in fancy chairs and act like they're listening?"

"No, you're thinking of therapists. I'm pretty sure."

"Either way, I think we should just enter her mind, already. I don't care if she doesn't want us to! I hate seeing her like this!"

"So do I, but you know mutants are hyper-sensitive to mind-entry. Even if we do it when she's unconscious, she's _still_ gonna know, and it'll just make her even more upset."

"Can she _possibly_ get worse than _this_?"

Ford didn't hear any of the demons' argument. He was busy analyzing the most recent picture. It was pretty simple: just a pattern of triangles that covered the page, each triangle being half-covered by a brick-like pattern.

And, each triangle had a circle that looked like an eye…

Ford's stomach dropped. The nightmares, the flashlight, the apparent hallucinations, and now the triangles…

Oh, shit.

Ford closed the book and sighed. "I have a theory."

"Do you think you know what's up with her?" Starclops asked, hope evident in her voice.

"Maybe." _I just hope I'm wrong._ Ford almost handed the book to Tad, but something told him that Nadia wouldn't want anyone seeing that picture. He tucked the book in his coat. He, of all people, understood wanting to keep Bill a secret. "Let's just say, I think I know what she's going through. I'll go find her and see if I can help her at all."

"Well, be gentle." Ford blinked. He wasn't used to Starclops being so serious. "Nadia's a strong girl, but, when she breaks, she _breaks_ , you know?"

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 **Yeah, the majority of feels will be in the next part. Review!**


	13. Mind Games (Part Two)

**Summary:** **Nadia becomes paranoid and delusional, and her friends fear for her sanity. Later, Starclops encounters an old flame.**

 **Reminder: All caps means deep demon voice.**

 **Warning: _This_ is the part with the most feels.**

* * *

 **Chapter Twelve: Mind Games (Part Two)**

It wasn't hard to find Nadia. This dimension seemed to be nothing but dense forests, and Nadia's gray skin and purple shirt stuck out amongst all the green and brown. He spotted her sitting against a tree, hugging her knees and resting her forehead on them. She seemed to be crying less now. Ford took that as a good sign.

Ford knelt down beside her. "Nadia?"

Nadia sniffed and looked at him with fearful eyes and tear-streaked cheeks. That look wasn't what split Ford's heart in half. It was when she asked quietly, "Are you Bill?"

Right then, Ford just wanted to obliterate anything that made her cry, starting with that worthless piece of geometry. Ford took off his glasses and forced a smile. "Nadia, look at my eyes. Are they yellow?"

Nadia smiled in relief and shook her head.

Ford reached into his coat held out his flashlight. "I understand if you don't want to take my word for it."

Nadia shook her head again. "I believe you."

Ford put the flashlight back in his coat and frowned. "So, you've met Bill, huh?"

Nadia frowned again, and her eyes shined with fresh tears. Ford reached out and pulled her into an embrace. He wasn't entirely sure what you were supposed to do when a woman cried, but he figured this was a good place to start. Then, Nadia started crying into his chest, and he thought he was doing something wrong. He almost pulled away, but she was gripping his shirt. Maybe, she _didn't_ want him to let go? But, crying implied that she was still upset, didn't it? And, he thought women in his own dimension were confusing. At the moment, the only thing that Ford was sure of was that Bill _would_ suffer for this. After much too long, in Ford's opinion, Nadia's sobs died down, but she was still gripping his now-wet shirt.

"Ford?" Her voice was raw.

Ford resisted the urge to kiss the top of her head and instead settled for stroking her hair. "Yes?"

"I made a deal with Bill."

Sadly, he had been expecting her to say that. "Is that why you've been so upset, lately?"

He felt her nod against him. "I...We were in Mighty Med, and…" She was weeping again, and, this time, Ford did kiss her head. If the situation was different, he might have questioned his impulsive action. "You died, Ford…" At that, he all but forgot how to breathe for a moment. "Bill said he'd bring you back, and-and he did, but…"

"Nadia, the reason isn't important, right now." But, he would _definitely_ ask about that dying-thing later. He pulled her back a little, and she looked up at him. He brushed her hair and tears from her face as he spoke. "I can't undo whatever Bill did, but I can still be here for you. Don't forget, he's messed with my own mind, before. So, if you need help with this, then I'll do everything I can for you. I promise."

Nadia snuggled back into his chest but not before Ford could see her small smile. "You mean that?"

He tightened his embrace. "I do, Nadia."

Nadia shifted as she lifted her arms to wrap them around his neck. At the same moment, he questioned how the human face could spike so high in temperature without burning any flesh. Nadia didn't say anything for a while, and Ford discovered that she had fallen asleep. It made sense, he supposed. She hadn't been sleeping much lately, if at all. Still, he wasn't used to such a huge act of trust. His eyes misted over. If she was still conscious, he would have been embarrassed at how emotional this was making him. He took off his glasses and wiped his eyes on his sleeve. He put his glasses back on, wondering what to do now. Should he sit there and wait for her to wake up? Should he carry her back to camp? He wished he was more experienced with women. All he knew was that Nadia had a lot of faith in him, and that fact was enough to make his insides turn to mush.

* * *

 _My suspicions are confirmed: Bill's gotten to Nadia. Their deal involved Bill saving my life, but I don't know what Nadia's end of the bargain is. Knowing that glorified tortilla chip, it's probably something god-awful._

 _After I'd carried Nadia back to camp, Tad told me that Echo and Starclops went out to look for us, and that he'd stayed behind, in case we came back. Echo had returned shortly after me and Nadia, so she and Tad went out to find Starclops. I decided to stay with Nadia, so she wouldn't wake up alone._

 _She's asleep on her sleeping bag, as I write this. She looks so content, it's hard to believe she'd just had an emotional and or mental breakdown._

Ford paused in his writing, when he heard Nadia whimper softly, her face pinched in fear. Heart heavy at the side, he absent-mindedly stroked her hair. She visibly relaxed at the touch, as though he was able to relieve her pain somehow.

She groggily opened her eyes. "Ford?"

"It's me, Nadia," he confirmed.

Yawning, she sat upright. "Where's everyone else?"

"Looking for Starclops, who was actually out looking for us."

Nadia bit her lip. "I really worried everyone."

Ford sighed. "It's not your fault. It was Bill." Normally, Bill's name would send a mixture of fear and anger through him. Now, it just plain made him want to punch something. "Do you wanna talk about that?"

Nadia swallowed and looked away from him. "Maybe later."

"Okay. Oh, before I forget." Ford reached into his coat and handed Nadia her sketchbook. "I figured you didn't want anyone to see that Bill-drawing."

Nadia took the book and stared at it for a moment. She flipped to the triangle-picture, tore it out, ripped it apart, and let the pieces blow away in the wind. Ford smiled and she returned the look and said, "Thanks. For everything. You're really great, Stanford."

The world evaporated, and all he could think about was the woman next to him. "Th-Think nothing of it."

She chuckled at his reaction. "You're adorable, you know that?" she asked before reaching into the backpack next to her. She pulled out a pencil, opened her book, and started drawing.

Ford sighed in contentment and returned to his writing.

 _I just don't understand how such horrible things always seem to happen to best of people. Fortunately, Nadia seems to bounce back from emotional anxiety pretty quickly. Must be a species-thing._

Speaking of… "Hey, Nadia, I've been meaning to ask; do mutants give off pheromones of some kind?"

To his surprise, Nadia looked at him like he was speaking another language. "Um...what?"

"Er, I'll take that as a no."

 _On a side note, I've just confirmed that mutants do NOT give off pheromones, which means my body's strangely pleasant reaction to Nadia's presence lies elsewhere._

* * *

"Yoo-hoo!" Starclops called as she wandered the forestry. "Nadia? Ford? Marco! This where you say Glorkinsmop! Or, Polo, depending on your religion!"

She was so focused on her search that she _almost_ didn't noticed the color drain from her surroundings. How did she end up in the mindscape?

Suddenly, a warm tingling sensation danced over her shoulder. Someone was giving her a yuflerage, the dream demon-equivalent of a kiss. Annoyed that someone was bold - or stupid - enough to do that to her from behind, she whipped around, preparing to slug the son of a bitch.

Then, her vengeful resolve turned to paste.

"It's been a long time, Stella," the son of a bitch said.

Starclops balled her fists at her sides, pretending that there weren't a million emotions shooting through her. "Don't call me that, _Bill_."

Bill chuckled lightly. "Ah, Stel- _Starclops_. You haven't changed a bit, have you?" His hand reached out and glided along one of her points, sending pleasant shivers running through her. "Still the feisty little comet I fell for thousands of years ago."

Starclops knocked his hand away. "What do you want?"

Bill shrugged. "I missed you."

"I seriously doubt that. Now, go away."

"Come on, baby." Bill grabbed both of her hands. Starclops let him, refusing to give him the satisfaction of seeing her squirm. "Why can't we be like the old days? We were happy, once."

The yuflerage radiated through his hands, and she this time she did pull away. "Why are you _really_ here?"

Bill sighed. "Nothing gets by you, does it? Fair enough. It's like this: I wanna strike a deal with you, sweetheart."

"Don't call me that. And, what kind of deal are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about your buddy, Nadia." Starclops thought she might faint, before she remembered she was physically incapable. "I can tell you what's wrong with her, _and_ I can even help her. All I ask is that you give me a second chance." He held out his hand, which was engulfed in a blue flame.

Starclops stared at it for a moment, and a guilty part of her considered his offer. Then, the rational part slapped that nutjob triangle in the face. "Do you think I'm _stupid_!? There's no way I'm letting you anywhere _near_ Nadia!"

Bill's eye turned a dangerous shade of red. "I think you want to take my offer, _Stella_." Starclops slapped him again, and Bill slapped her twice as hard. She crashed into the ground with a grunt, the force creating a star-shaped dent in the dirt. His eye was a dangerous shade of red. "LAST. CHANCE."

Starclops's eye went red, as well. "GO TO HELL."

They stared each other down for a while. Then, Bill crossed his arms. His eye returned to normal, but he still looked pretty ticked off. "Fine. Have it your way. But, you should know, baby, that, when Nadia ends up with the worst nightmare of her pathetic little life, it will be on you."

His words struck a cord in Starclops's mind, and her eye returned to its angry red as she shot back into the air. "YOU! You did something to Nadia! You mind-raped her, just to get at me, didn't you?"

Bill laughed darkly. "Gotta hand it to you, Stella; you're as smart as I remember. Although, I can't take all the credit. Nadia _did_ shake my hand, after all. Something _you're_ gonna regret not doing."

He vanished, and the color returned to her surroundings. She was out of the mindscape. Not even caring if she was really alone at this point, Starclops collapsed to the ground as dry sobs escaped her. The sudden realization of what was happening tore her apart. Nadia made a deal with Bill, who was messing with the poor mutant's head and, by the sound of it, was just getting warmed up. Starclops knew none of this was her fault, but she always felt like Nadia was her responsibility. Now, Nadia was losing her sanity, and, once a dream demon took that away, there was no known way to bring it back.

Starclops had managed to compose herself by the time Tad and Echo found her. Thankfully, since dream demons were physically incapable of producing tears, they had no idea that she'd been crying.

...Probably.

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* * *

 **Are you shocked? Do you wanna know more? Well, you're gonna have to wait, because I'm going to be taking a break from the more intense stuff and focus on comedy! But, this _is_ a fan-made _Gravity Falls_ spin-off, so be on the lookout for subtle hints about what's to come, and don't forget to crack the codes!**

 **This episode has the last code the uses the Caesar cipher, and this particular code is a quote. If you can tell me where the quote came from, then I'll give one of your OCs a cameo appearance in a future episode!**

 **Review, everyone!**


	14. No Blood, No Glory (Part One)

**Summary: The gang attend a dance, and a girl gets annoyed when Ford won't pay her any attention. Meanwhile, Ford and Nadia make a discovery in a hidden room.**

 **A guest called WishingMiracles requested that a girl makes Nadia jealous. This is what I came up with. Also, to those of you who deciphered the code in the previous episode: your OCs will _not_ be in this episode. They will be in the next one. I have labeled said episode in the list on my profile.**

 **From now on, all codes can be translated with the vignere cipher. The keyword is in bold.**

* * *

 **Chapter Thirteen: No Blood, No Glory (Part One)**

 _Things have calmed down considerably since Nadia's breakdown in Dimension 48 (at least, that's what I'm calling the place). One thing I've noticed, however, is that Starclops has been - understandably - paying much closer attention to her, though whether or not Nadia's noticed is unknown to me. We're now in what I have dubbed Dimension 52, which is surprisingly similar to an Earth city. The only real difference is the people, who are all various species. I hope we stay here for a while. There are so many creatures to meet and study. From things I know about, like gnomes and lepricorns, to beings I never would have imagined, like a giant floating baby head. Although that one's more disturbing than anything else around here, it seems a lot more docile than the "Time Baby" that Blendin Blandin told me about back in Gravity Falls._

 _According to the locals, this dimension is sort of a refuge area that welcomes beings from any and all dimensions. Some use it as a vacation spot, some to hide from the law of their own universe, and some just live here. Another lucky break is that this place accepts all forms of currency, so we managed to get a hotel room._

 _I do have one negative comment to make. Starclops discovered that there was some kind of dance going on tonight. I didn't expect it to make her so excited, but then she told us the reason she wanted to attend: let's just say, she must have somehow heard about Stephen King's_ Carrie _and is now hoping that she can see it in real life. As for my own enthusiasm about attending a dance, well, it doesn't exactly...exist…_

Ford paused in his writing and thought back to his senior prom.

 _*Flashback*_

 _A teenage Ford nervously walked up to his crush, Alice Rogers. He cleared his throat, and she looked at him, raising an eyebrow. "So…" he drawled dumbly. He swallowed and laughed sheepishly. "Um… Do you come here often?"_

 _Alice tossed her punch in his face._

 _*End of Flashback*_

 _There is a silver lining, though. I'll be able to mingle with all kinds of new and amazing creatures. At least, among Lord knows how many different beings, I won't seem like, as the popular kids called me, "that weird six-fingered guy." On a side note, popularity is not next to creativity._

"I don't know, Starclops." Ford looked up from his journal. Nadia was looking at herself in mirror, eyeing her long-sleeved yellow dress (Starclops had materialized it for her) with disdain. "I like that it covers my scars, but it kinda hugs my body, and it's a little more," she pointed at the dress's deep V-neck, "revealing than I'm comfortable with."

 _On another side note, Nadia looks_ _fantastic_ _in her dress._

Starclops flew in front of her. "First of all, that's all the stuff you _want_ a dress to do. Second, there's barely any cleavage showing. And, third, you barely have any boobs to begin with. You know, if you want, I could make those little girls into big girls-"

Nadia fervently shook her head, her face quickly reddening. "No! No, I'm good!"

Tad asked good-naturedly, "What is it with women and their appearances?"

Ford laughed. "Tad Strange, that may be one mystery that no one can solve." Echo happily grabbed an aquamarine hair clip out of the wardrobe and handed it to Nadia, who clipped in in her hair. "I wonder if they'll Echo in."

Tad shrugged. "Why wouldn't they? I mean, they let a giant floating baby head in, didn't they?"

"Good point."

* * *

The ballroom was packed, and Ford was elated. So many species, so little time, and so little ink in one pen! He was glad he'd tucked away his **journal** in his tuxedo jacket.

Starclops had went off to do hopefully nothing that would get them kicked out. Tad was leaning against the wall, happy to just enjoy the music. Nadia was over by the snack bar drinking...whatever that was. And, Echo was...probably in there.

* * *

"You ain't gettin' in here," the huge, rock-like bouncer told her. "Ever since the owner's wife got her memory erased, he don't want no snarks gettin' in here."

Echo crossed her arms and pouted in annoyance. She whipped around indignantly and crawled away. She couldn't get in through the front? Fine. She would find another way in.

* * *

At the moment, Ford was interviewing a female creature named Dara, jotting down everything he could about her. "My studies indicate that imps, such as yourself, have a desire to become full-fledged demons. True?"

The imp was pretty - though that wasn't saying much, given her species - with a short dark red bob and amber eyes. Her skin was pale red, her dark wings were worn on the ends, and she was half Ford's height. She smiled, and Ford didn't catch the flirt in her squeaky voice. "Oh, absolutely. And, to get there, we need to serve our masters." She arched her back, emphasizing her too-big-for-her-body breasts. "We _live_ to please."

Unfortunately for her, Ford was too busy writing to pay any attention. "And, are imps really as fond of trickery as I hear?"

Dara pursed her lips. "Do you _have_ to ask all these research questions? Can't we just dance?"

Ford raised an eyebrow. "You want to dance with me?"

"Yeah! I've seen you around, and I think we could hang."

Ford blinked. "Oh." Dara grinned, showcasing crooked yellow teeth. Ford caught a whiff of her breath. Yikes. "Uh, thank you, but I'm kind of here with some people…"

"Hey, Ford," Nadia approached him, and Dara scowled. "Can we talk in private?"

Ford frowned in concern. Nadia was obviously upset about something. "What's the matter?"

Nadia bit her lip. "J-Just come with me, alright?"

Now, he _knew_ something was wrong. Ford tucked his pen and journal back in his jacket. "Alright."

He tried to follow Nadia, but Dara grabbed his arm and batted her eyelashes. "You don't want to go with _her_ , do you? Wouldn't you rather dance with _me_?" She swayed side to side, allowing her over-sized breasts to push each other, making audible smacking-sounds under her dress. Ford shuddered and half-jogged away for her. Dara scowled again and called angrily, "You'd pick a _mutant_ over someone as beautiful as _me_!?" She crossed her arms and muttered, "Fine. I have _ways_ of dealing with this sort of thing…"

Starclops materialized in front of the imp and glared at her. "Hey, you, I overheard-slash-eavesdropped-on you talking out loud to yourself. Don't even _think_ about messing with that mutant."

Dara rolled her eyes. "I don't have to listen to you. Imps only follow _traditional_ demons. Not _dream demons_ , who just play with brains." She shoved Starclops to the side and walked away.

Starclops balled her fists at her sides. "Why, that little…" She teleported herself to Tad, who didn't even blink when she so suddenly. "Did you see that?"

Tad shrugged. "An ugly girl flirting with Ford?"

"Yes, _that_ \- ew, by the way - but I'm talking about Nadia. I saw her watching them, and she looked pretty annoyed."

"Of course, she did. That imp was practically throwing herself at Ford."

"But, didn't you catch Little Miss Boobs giving Nadia the death-look right back? She's going to do something, and Nadia doesn't need any more stress, after Bill Ciph-" That was when Starclops realized that she should probably stop talking.

Especially since her friend was _definitely_ listening now. "Bill? _Cipher_? What does he have to do with anything?"

Starclops waved dismissively. "Never mind all that. I'm not gonna let Nadia get hurt, and you're either with me or against me."

Tad weighed his options. He could just relax and _not_ do something that could potentially get them both thrown out, or he could keep Nadia from getting hurt. He sighed. "Alright, but we're gonna talk about this Bill-thing."

Starclops clapped once. "First, we need to get Nadia out of harm's way."

* * *

Nadia led him off to the side, looking rather uncomfortable. Ford noticed how she seemed to favor looking at everything that wasn't him. "What's wrong?" he asked.

Nadia awkwardly rubbed her arm, finally meeting his gaze. "I...didn't like the way that imp was eyeballing you…"

"Eyeballing?" Ford repeated. "What exactly does that mean?"

"Seriously?" she asked incredulously. "She was staring at you like you were her next meal, and she was, um, _accentuating_ her...parts…"

Ford laughed. He couldn't help it. "You honestly think she was _flirting_ with me?"

"You _don't_?"

"Well, I don't really know enough about her kind to be sure-"

"I just don't trust imps. They play all kinds of cruel jokes. Moreover, I dated an imp once, and all those things want to do is…"

Ford raised an eyebrow at how red Nadia's face suddenly was. "Is…"

She swallowed. "Get in...bed with you… I-I just don't wanna see you get pregnant."

" _What_?" Now, it was his turn to change colors. "I-I-I'm a _guy_. I physically _cannot_ get pregnant."

"Male humans can't bear children?"

"Male mutants _can_?"

Needless to say, they were immensely grateful, when Starclops interrupted. "Hey, guys. I just came by to say one thing." She held out her hand, and the closet door opened. "This is for your own good."

"Wait, what?" was all Ford could say before the demon shoved them both in the closet, slammed the door, twisted her hand in the shape of a key, and locked them inside.

Tad just gawked at her. "Um… Was that necessary?"

Starclops's hand morphed back to normal. "Nope. Not at all."

"Also, why is Ford in there, too?"

Starclops thought about that briefly then shrugged. "Collateral damage?"

* * *

"Well..." Nadia drawled. "That happened."

Ford tried to opened the door and scowled when it wouldn't budge. He banged on the door in frustration. "Starclops, open this door, you knucklehead!" After a moment of just standing there like an idiot, he sighed and placed a hand on his forehead. "What in hell's name is she up to, now?"

Nadia leaned a hand against the wall of the closet. "I'm not sure we want to know."

Suddenly the tile she was leaning on pushed in, and the wall caved in. Startled, she almost fell through. Ford managed to catch her around the waist, and she gripped his shoulders for support.

Ford felt like he'd been struck by lightning, as he realized what position they were in. Nadia stared up at him, seemingly mesmerized. If he wanted to, he actually could have peaked down the V-neck of her dress. But, stars above, he didn't _dare_.

Ford swallowed, though his mouth was unusually dry. "Are-Are you alright?"

"Yeah," she breathed. "I am."

"Good." Then Ford blushed, realizing what was happening, and positioned Nadia upright, suddenly wanting to put as much distance between them as possible. Nadia seemed equally embarrassed. Ford coughed. "So, um, yeah."

Nadia turned around and gaped at where the wall used to be. "Whoa… Where do you think these stairs go?"

Ford smiled, grateful for a distraction. Especially one this interesting. "Only one way to find out."

 **CVY FSFTLWUC CATAWHX AAXN WM WBRORO.**

* * *

 **Is Dara too sexual? Good, because that's the point. Instant turn-off, along with everything else about her. Review!**


	15. No Blood, No Glory (Part Two)

**Summary:** **The gang attend a dance, and a girl gets annoyed when Ford won't pay her any attention. Meanwhile, Ford and Nadia make a discovery in a hidden room.**

 **Hey, remember in _"_ A Tale of Two Stans," when Ford mistook Soos for a big gopher? Well...**

* * *

 **Chapter Fourteen: No Blood, No Glory (Part Two)**

Dara flew up to the ceiling and attached a bucket to the air vent with some rope. Unbeknownst to her, a little, square-shaped blue light phased out of her head. It flew over to a certain star-shaped creature and grew into its natural form.

"Okay, here's what I've gathered from Dara's mind," Tad told the star. "She found some unicorn blood in the kitchen - don't ask me what _that_ was doing in there - and she's gathered a bunch of it in a bucket. She plans on luring Nadia underneath the bucket and dumping it on her."

Starclops blinked. "That's not very creative. But, as much as I'd like to see someone get blood dumped on them, I'd rather it not be Nadia. Let's see what we can do about this."

Tad pointed to the closet. "Shouldn't we get her and Ford out of the closet?"

Starclops waved him off. "Nah. They're probably making out or something. Besides, I don't want Nadia out of there until I _know_ it's safe."

"What about Ford?"

"I told you; he's collateral damage."

* * *

In hindsight, perhaps crawling through the air ducts to get into the building wasn't the best idea. It was cold, too dark to see, and Echo was a little worried about encountering dust bunnies - creatures that, despite being smaller, preyed on snarks. But, it was too late to go back now. Mostly, because she was officially lost.

Then, she heard a familiar voice. "You know, I envy your night vision." Was that Ford? "If not for the banister, I'd have a pretty rough time tracking where I'm going."

Another voice - Nadia? - responded with, "It's so creepy in here, I'm more worried there's something tracking us."

Echo desperately wished there was a way for her to see them or at least communicate with them. She sighed and continued on her mission to get the hell out of those stupid vents.

* * *

After a _lot_ of stairs, they reached the bottom, and Nadia found a light switch. She flipped it on, and they both gaped at what they saw. The staircase led to a large room, which had walls lined with paintings. Ford just stood there, gawking at them. He didn't recognize any of them, but he hadn't expected to; he _was_ in another dimension, after all. He whipped out his journal and pen, eager to document his findings. What secrets did these paintings hold? Historical events? Important people? Interdimensional cultures?

"This is incredible!" Nadia exclaimed. She raced to the nearest painting: a castle that appeared to be made entirely of either ice or glass. "These paintings are exquisite!" Ford followed her to the painting, journal open. Given her passion for the arts, he had a feeling that she would have no problem explaining the meanings of these artworks. "This is the Great Frost of Dimension 496!"

The Great Frost, huh? So, it _was_ an ice castle. Ford wrote that down on a blank page. "I've never heard of that. What is it?"

So, Nadia launched into a story about Princess Elsa, who was born with the ability to control ice (which was much more powerful than Nadia's own). On her coronation day, Elsa lost control of her abilities and created a perpetual winter in her kingdom. She had been driven out of her homeland because of this and created an ice castle in the mountains to live in. She eventually managed to fix everything, but Nadia said that she would get into detail about that when they had more time.

They went on like that for a while, going from painting to painting. Nadia would explain the event or person linked to the artwork, and Ford would write it down. He couldn't remember the last time he'd had so much fun. At one point, he actually found an event that _he_ recognized - the signing of the Declaration of Independance - and explained it to his companion.

"That's awesome," she commented after he finished his story. "You really know your history."

Ford shrugged modestly. "It's just something that molded my country into the land I was born in. You're the one with extensive knowledge."

"Well, that comes with spending the majority of your life hopping through dimensions. You learn a lot, you see a lot. If you keep traveling, Ford, then you'll be the one telling people about interdimensional history."

"You dudes are well informed." They jumped at a new voice. They hadn't heard the new creature approach; for such a large being, it was rather light on its feet. It looked to Ford like a human-sized gopher in a green button-up shirt. The gopher waved. It seemed friendly enough. "'Sup, dawg? Name's Larman. I'm the tour guide of this museum."

"Museum?" Ford repeated. Well, that explained all the paintings.

"You heard me, hambone. My boss gathered a bunch of paintings of interdimensional history and put them all in one place for people to learn and admire. Also, he illegally smuggled all of them and needed something to do with them. Whoops! Probably shouldn't have said that."

"If this place is supposed to be open to the public," Nadia said, deciding to ignore that part about smuggling, "why would you have a secret entrance for it?"

Larman seemed confused. Then, realization lit up his features. "Oh! No, there's a regular entrance to here. Thing is, this place used to be, like, a funhouse. Y'know, for kids. When it got bought out, my boss boarded up all the secret passageways. Guess he missed one, or something." He laughed. "Go figure. So, you dudes want a tour?"

Yes. Definitely. Absolutely! The more Ford could learn about interdimensional history, the better! Nadia happily agreed, but it was more from her love of artistry than a desire for knowledge; she already knew about most of the history showcased.

* * *

Frankly, Tad didn't want anything to do with...whatever this was. Unfortunately, Starclops was hard to argue with. Mostly, because you never got to put your two cents in. So, he was forced to listen to her little plan and help however was necessary. This was for Nadia, though. If he got thrown out because of it, well, hopefully nothing bad would happen to her.

"So, here's what I'm thinking," Starclops told him. "We lure Dara under her own bucket and dump it on her. It's not my most creative revenge scheme, but I was really hoping to see someone get blood dumped on them. I just need a way to lure her under…"

She was giving him that I'm-waiting-for-a-response-look. Tad sighed. He didn't know why he liked her. He just kind of did. "Well, I know that imps love shiny things."

Starclops snapped her fingers. "Excellent! Thaddeus, my friend, you might be a pain in the angle, but you are a hell of a smarty!"

"And, you're incredibly weird."

"And, you love me for it!"

* * *

"And, here we have 'Creativus Namus Overratus,' a tragedy that occurred in Dimension B78SemiColon," Larmen explained, gesturing to a painting of huge red flames and what looked like bodies. "The name of this event is loosely translated to 'The Big Fire.' A fire broke out in the woods and spread to a nearby city. Hundreds were injured, and almost as many died from either the fire itself or fourth-degree burns, which are like third-degree burns, but magic."

"Wow…" Nadia breathed, horrified at the thought. So much death… Even Ford had looked up from his writing in shock. "What could have possibly caused a fire _that_ deadly?"

"No one knows. The only one who may have known anything refused to talk about it. And, I can see why. According to my research, he was, like, caught in the middle of the fire. He was, like, totally covered in burns and stuff. If he wasn't a dream demon, I'd wonder how he managed to survive."

Ford raised an eyebrow. "Dream demon?" Could Bill have started the fire?

"Oh, yeah. Some little square dude, from what I hear. I forget his name."

Square? Dream demon? Nadia's stomach flipped over. Something like that could easily cause… What did Ford call it? Pyrophobia, right? "Um, was it Tad Strange?"

Larman smiled and snapped his fingers. "Yeah! I think that was it! Man, you _really_ know your history, girl-dude!"

Ford and Nadia expressed sad looks, both of them thinking the same thing: if this _was_ Tad, then it would certainly explain why he was so terrified of fire.

* * *

They would have taken the normal way out of the museum, but Larman said that the secret passage was probably faster. Although, if they'd known the closet door would still be locked, they would have taken the long way.

Ford groaned and leaned his back against the door. "As we say in my dimension… This is stupid."

"I don't even know why Starclops locked us in here," Nadia said. She shrugged and gave a small smile. "That said, I had fun down there."

Ford laughed lightly. "Yeah, me too." Then the door swung open, and Ford collapsed ungracefully to the floor, startling some nearby partiers.

Tad was looking down at him. "I just wanna say, I wanted _no_ part of this."

"No part of what," Nadia asked, stepping out of the closet, "dare I ask?"

Ford stood up and brushed himself off. Starclops poked his cheek so hard, he half-expected a tiny bruise to form. She pointed a bucket on the ceiling. "Watch and learn, folks. As soon as we find a way to lure Dara under that bucket, I use my powers to dump it all over her."

"Why would you wanna do that?" Nadia wondered.

"'Cause revenge is fun! Now, I just have lure her under and-"

Dara tripped over her dress, cursed under breath, and picked herself up. She didn't noticed that she was now directly underneath the bucket. Meanwhile, Echo had finally found an exit from the vents, and shoved it open. The force tipped the bucket upside-down, and Dara screamed as a red liquid was poured all over her. The people around her burst into laughter.

"Or, maybe that'll happen," Tad quipped.

Starclops didn't care how it happened. She cheered, "Woohoo! Carrie! Carrie! **Carrie**!"

Ford glanced questioningly at Starclops. "Is that red stuff-"

"Ketchup," Starclops said a little too quickly. "It's totally ketchup."

An embarrassed Echo decided that wandering blindly through air vents was preferable to...whatever this was.

 **VHRK EEU KVKKLWP JKMTJEE BQRI SKPTI.**

* * *

 **Okay, next episode will have the OCs of the winning authors from the previous episode! Review!**


	16. Trivia Cracked

**Summary: The gang become contestants on a game show that asks outlandish questions and has even worse consequences for answering incorrectly. (Based on the _Victorious_ episode, "Brain Squeezers")**

 **Star belongs to Daron Nefcy, Amy belongs to Rose Verdict, and Penny belongs to Girldog321. I apologize ahead of time to both of you. :P Anyway, this episode is meant only for laughs and contains no secrets.**

 **Probably. Wink, wink.**

 **Also, Sorryimaguest asked why Starclops was chanting "Carrie" in the previous episode. That was referencing the Stephen King novel, _Carrie_ , which the "ketchup" spilling scene came from.**

 **Also, the game show has the same name as an app I'm making fun of. X) And, do you remember in "Mabel's Guide to Art," when Toby mentioned having cat whiskers? Well...**

* * *

 **Chapter Fifteen: Trivia Cracked**

 _Trivia Crack_

 _AKA the multiverse's most ridiculous and physically painful game show. Seriously, what sicko thought of this and said, "Yeah, that'll be fun! Let's ask impossible questions and almost kill all the contestants!"_

 _The only reason I would have even considered appearing on Trivia Crack was because Starclops learned that the winning team received a cash prize. Each team needs four members (which ended up being me, her, Tad, and Nadia, with Echo staying in the hotel, since she can't talk), and it's basically impossible to argue with Starclops. The woman just talks too much for one to even attempt to say anything._

 _I was actually okay with being on that show. "How bad could it be?" I thought. In my defense, that was before I actually knew what the game was._

* * *

Eight podiums lined the stage. The four on the left - the blue team - had Tad, Ford, and Nadia, with Starclops's podium seated closest to the center. The four on the right - the yellow team - was Larman, Amy - a humanoid with yellow skin, green fire for hair, and four green eyes - and Penny - a light pink, triangular dream demon with a hot pink bow on her highest point - with Star - a human-looking girl with bright blue eyes and long blond hair - closest to the center. The contestants' names were on the fronts of their podiums. Two screens, each showing the individual teams' scores, hung above each team.

The game had just begun, and the host - an ugly cat-like creature with possibly the strangest accent Ford had ever hear - arrived onstage. He faced the audience and spoke into his… That was _not_ a microphone. "Hello, everyone! I'm your host, Tobio Catermeen, and welcome to Trivia Crack! Let's meet our contestants." He gestured to the blue team. "On the blue team, we have Starclops, Nadia, Ford, and Tad."

Starclops waved enthusiastically. "Hi, TV-people!"

Nadia gave a small smile and a quick wave. "Great to be here!"

Tad raised a finger pointedly. "I did not have a choice in this matter!"

Ford, however, felt the need to point out, "Your microphone's a turkey baster, Tobio."

Tobio glanced down at the object in his hands. "It certainly is. Anyway, on the yellow team, we have Star, Penny, Amy, and Larman."

Star waved with both hands and jumped up and down, as though on a permanent sugar rush. "Hi! Hi, everybody!"

Penny laughed at her friend's enthusiasm. "Save your energy for the actual game, Star."

"Yeah, seriously," Amy said. "Just try to keep it on the down low until we win."

"Speak for yourselves, girl-dudes," Larman replied, grinning. "I am _so_ stoked for this!"

Tobio looked back at the studio audience. "And, now that we've got introductions out of the way, let's get started, shall we?" The audience cheered. "Fantastic enthusiasm! Here's how the game works: I'll tell the team captains - Starclops and Star-"

Larman laughed. "Sorry, it's just- Dude, both the captains are named Star. Ya gotta admit, that's kinda funny, right? Right? I am the only one thinkin' that?"

"I'll tell the team captains the category," Tobio continued. "Then, they'll pick who on their team will answer the question. If that person gets it right, they'll win a point for their team! If they get it wrong, something else will happen!"

"Wait, what?" Ford asked, suddenly getting a bad feeling in his gut. "What will happen?"

But, his worries went unanswered, as Tobio said, "This first question is for the blue team. The category is art. Who will answer it, Starclops?"

"Hm…" Starclops looked over her teammates. Specifically the mutant, who was grinning and pointing to herself with both thumbs. "I'm thinking Nadia."

"Yes!" Nadia cried out, pumping her fist.

Tobio read the question off the cue card off-screen. "Which famous artist took baths with his mother's dog?"

Nadia immediately deflated. Was he serious? He _couldn't_ be serious, right? But, that really _was_ the question on the cue card. She threw her hands up in frustration. "I don't know! Who would know that!?"

A buzzer went off. "Time's up! That means Nadia gets a doink!"

"Um, okay. What exactly is-" Before Nadia could finish her sentence, a heap of white powder erupted from her podium and all over her body. After the initial shock wore off, Nadia wondered what just happened. And, why Starclops seemed to find this to be so darn funny.

Tobio just carried on as though nothing happened. "And, Nadia's been flour-blasted! Now, our next question is for the yellow team. Star, who will answer a question about music?"

Star gasped in delight. "Music is Penny's specialty!"

"Okay, Penny. In Justin Bieber's hit song, _Baby_ , how many times is the word 'baby' said?"

Penny just floated there in shock. "Bieber? There's, like, a million interdimensional versions of him. And, none of them are any good to begin with, so how am I supposed to know-"

"Time's up."

"But, I don't even know which Bieber we're talking about!"

"That's a **doink**! And, Penny, it seems that you're a victim of assault and battery."

Penny paused, wondering what that meant. "Assault and battery? What?"

"A- _salt_!"

Pounds and pounds of salt rained down on her from above, and she screamed in pain. "My eye! Do you _know_ how long it takes to regenerate those things!?"

"And, _battery_!"

Penny raised her arms over her head in attempt to shield herself from whatever was about to fall on her.

Only for Starclops to get hammered by at least a hundred batteries. When, they stopped, her eye turned an angry red. "What the _hell_!?"

Tad said angrily, "Why would you attack _her_? _Penny_ got the answer wrong!"

Tobio nodded. "I see your point." At that, batteries were dumped on Penny's head. "Next question."

"What is wrong is with this gameshow?" Starclops huffed.

Tobio ignored her. "The category is science." Suddenly, Ford forgot everything bad that just happened. This was _his_ domain.

"You're up, Ford," Starclops told him half-heartedly.

"Ford, what are the vwf ayezm tkvsa?"

Ford just stared at him. Then, he glanced at the cue card, which offered him no help at all. "Um...what?"

"Time's up!"

"But, I couldn't even understan-"

"You get a very special doink."

An unusually small manotaur picked up a protesting Ford and moved in front of the host, who pulled out a small mallet from inside his jacket. The manotaur held Ford in place.

Tobio lifted the mallet. "You get the crotch-whack!"

" _What_!?" Ford struggled in the manotaurs grip. "Wait, wait! I-I don't think you understand how the human body works!"

Tobio whacked him, and Ford let out a huge scream and collapsed at the searing pain in the one place that pain _really_ didn't belong. The other contestants cringed, and Larman commented, "Dude, I don't care what species you are; that _always_ hurts, like, a _lot_."

Tobio tossed the mallet asied. "Let's move on."

"Can I have a minute?" Ford asked, his voice a few octaves higher than normal.

* * *

A few questions later, everyone but Star and Tobio was either bruised, dirty, or both, but they were all more than sick of the show. The only good thing was that both teams had one point.

"The next category is mutants," Tobio said.

Nadia, whose hair was now singed at the ends, gaped. " _Seriously_?" _She_ was a mutant, for crying out loud! Why did that question have to go to the other team?

Star pursed her lips in thought. She had a friend who was a mutant, so she could probably answer that herself, but she knew that one of her teammates had more experience with them than she did. "Uh, how about Amy?"

"No!" Amy protested. She'd already had an owl attempt to eat her tongue!

But, the host ignored her. "What was the first dimension that the mutants ravaged during the Mutant War?"

Ford blinked. Mutant War? He thought about the Wikiwaka tribe, and how they'd tried to use Nadia as a sacrifice. Was that the reason?

Amy frowned in thought. "Dimension...46ApostropheBackslash?"

"Wrong!" Tobio cried out. "You get a doink!"

"Oh no!" Amy braced herself. A boxing glove sprang out of her podium and nailed her in the jaw. "Ugh…" It nailed her again, and she barely maintained consciousness.

Tobio just laughed. "Looks like someone's been double-doinked."

Amy spat out a small white thing and paled. "Oh, God, that was a tooth!"

"Starclops, this question's about demons."

Starclops tapped her "chin" in mock thought. "Tobio, I'd gladly answer that, but I don't wanna risk getting tickled by another dream catcher or pounded by more batteries. I'll let Tad handle this one."

"Wait, what?" Tad asked, still aching from the car battery that fell on him earlier.

Tobio read the cue card. "What is the meaning of the symbols on the Cipher Wheel?"

Tad's eyes lit up. "Hey, I actually know that one! The symbols represent-" A toilet dropped on him, knocking him to the floor.

While everyone else gaped (and Ford exclaimed in annoyance, "Oh, come on!"), Tobio laughed nervously. "Whoops. Seems there was a glitch in the system. S-So, that answer, Tad?"

Tad tried to pull himself up to the podium and, barely conscious, muttered, "Oak trees are evil…?"

"And, that's a doink!"

"Dude, hasn't he already, like, been doinked?" Larman asked. Suddenly, three dark red birds flew at him and started pecking him mercilessly. "AH! AH! _Why is this happening_!?"

"Oopsy!" Tobio giggled. "Seems we've doinked the wrong contestant. Oh, well. Moving on!"

Larman tried punching the birds, but they kept pecking him. "They won't stop! AAAAHHHHH!"

* * *

It was a commercial break, and Starclops took the oppurtunity to apologize. "Guys, I am _so_ sorry about all this. Ford thought it was nothing more than an ordinary gameshow."

"Wait, what?" Ford glared daggers. " _You're_ the one who-"

"Now, now, Stanford. No need to play the blame game."

"But, you-"

Tad decided to change the subject, since Starclops would _never_ admit that she was wrong. "You know what I'm sorry about? I'm sorry that _Star hasn't been doinked yet_!"

All the contestants voiced their disapproval of that fact. Star just blushed and pulled her blond locks over her face, as though that would somehow camouflage her.

Tobio walked back on stage, and the contestants quieted down. "And, we're back with our final question for the yellow team. The topic is Mewni."

Star moved her hair out of her face and grinned. "That's my dimension! I'll answer this one!"

"What event is celebrated on Mewnipendence Day?"

"The Great Monster Massacre!"

"Correct! That means that the yellow team wins!"

The yellow team cheered, while the blue team groaned at the fact that they went through all that torture for _nothing_. The manotaur walked onstage and sat a giant bag of money on the floor. Star ran after it, but the manotaur grabbed her, tossed her to the floor, and sat on her.

Tobio knelt down in front of the incredibly confused teenager. "Okay, Star. When, we start the timer, you will have ten seconds to grab that cash. If you can grab it, the money is yours. Are you ready?"

Star clenched her fists in determination. "Oh, I'm ready, baby!"

"Now, grab that cash!"

Star reached with all her might. Her team cheered her on, while the other team just stared in shock. Except for Starclops, who was egging on the manotaur. "Go manotaur! Sit on that weirdo!"

A loud buzzer sounded. Tobio picked up the bag. "Time's up! No one gets the cash! See you next time on Trivia Crack!" As he dragged the bag away, the contestants just stood there, all wondering the same thing: Why did they even consider this game show?

* * *

 _In short, I can verify that Trivia Crack is the single_ _worst_ _game show ever. If anyone's reading this, I can offer you one piece of advice. If you're considering taking part in a game show of any kind, actually_ _watch_ _it first. It could save you a lot on medical bills in the long run._

 **WVM PYQHMFDDBBF VDHME LHOB HZ WVM UYVH IAN SFWQEFSZF YI HZVFLO KEKFY.**

* * *

 **Did you catch any secrets? One was kind of obvious, but other is carefully concealed foreshadowing. Review!**


	17. Bill's Warning

**An intermission, but an important one! So, if you haven't read "Mighty Falls," you might wanna read that chapter first.**

* * *

 **Chapter Sixteen: Bill's Warning**

 _Nadia banged on the walls, she screamed, she shouted all the profanities in all the languages she knew, but it didn't get her anywhere. Finally, frustration made her settle for a quick kick to the wall of the giant glass box she was trapped in. Then, loud footsteps assaulted her eardrums and filled her with barely contained panic._

 _A giant yellow triangle with four arms, each holding a different struggling creature, walked into the room. He glanced down at the prisoner, as though just realizing that she was there. He dropped his four victims, who plummeted to the ground but not before being restrained by glowing blue chains. Tad, Starclops, Echo, and Ford tried in vain to escape._

 _The triangle retracted two of his extra arms. "Well, well, well. Nadia Blackburne, my old pal! Fancy meeting you here."_

" _What do you want, Bill?" Nadia demanded, at the same time wondering why this monster had decided to capture her friends, too._

 _Bill casually straightened his bowtie, as though he thought the mutant before him actually gave two damns about his appearance. "Just thought I'd give you a little heads-up. Remember our deal? How I saved ol' Sixer's behind, and, in return, you'd let me test out a little something?" Nadia blanched. Was this it? Was this the new type of dream manipulation he'd talked about? "Well, I've_ almost _got it down pat. Should be any time now that I decide to give it a go on a living, breathing organism."_

 _Nadia wanted so badly to forget about that, but her frequent nightmares wouldn't let her. And, now Bill was practically ready…_

 _Crap. Just...crap._

" _But, what do they have to do with any of this?" she asked, gesturing to her still-struggling friends._

 _Bill shrugged. "What? Can't a guy have a little fun? Speaking of fun…" Bill turned to her friends, who stopped struggling and stared at him in horror when he said, "I think I'm gonna kill one of them now, just for the hell of it!"_

"What _!?" Nadia banged on her prison even harder, not caring how badly the action hurt her fists. "You can't! You just_ can't _!"_

 _Bill's eye projected a spotlight on Tad. "Eenie." He moved it over to Starclops. "Meenie." Then to Echo. "Miney." Finally stopping on Ford. "YOU."_

" _NO!" Ford shouted. But, his protests were forever silenced by the snap of his neck and the brief gurgle that erupted from his throat._

* * *

" _Ford_!" Nadia bolted upright from her sleeping bag. She slowly calmed down upon realizing that she was back in the cold desert that was Dimension 95Z8. Tad and Starclops were probably off spying on people's dreams, and Echo's kind preferred sleeping in burrows, so the mutant was alone except for-

"Nadia!" Ford quickly crawled from his own sleeping bag to her side, his eyes wild with concern. "Are you alright?"

Nadia discovered that her throat was too dry to swallow. "I-I guess. Are you?" She eyed his neck, relieved to see no visible marks that would suggest any injuries.

Ford raised an eyebrow at the question, then sighed. "Another Bill-dream?"

Nadia nodded, hugging herself against the chill of the night air. And, to think, nighttime was _warmer_ than daytime in this dimension. To her surprise, Ford took off his trench coat - which, he _rarely_ removed, since it contained his journal and concealed his ray gun - and gently draped it over his companion's shoulders. Why would anyone want to do something so...unorthodox, for lack of a better word? Was it some kind of human custom? Nadia didn't ask. She just thanked him, already comforted by the coat's warmth and the fact that it emanated the same scent that Ford did.

"So, do you wanna talk about it?" Ford asked, already shivering from the cold but not regretting giving her his coat. Although, he _definitely_ regretted not wearing a warmer shirt underneath it.

Nadia almost said no, but then she remembered something Ford once said about telling others about your nightmares. Supposedly, it made you feel better or something? Besides, Ford had experience with Bill, and he'd promised to help her.

So, she told him about her nightmare, feeling a little better about it as she got the weight of it off her chest. Ford sat next to her, listening intently. She could almost see the gears turning in his head.

When she had finished her story, Ford asked, "So, this dream manipulation; was that your end of the deal?" Nadia nodded. "Do you have any idea what it might mean?" She shrugged. "Well," he wrapped an arm around her shoulders, and she snuggled into him, "just know that I'll be there for you when it happens."

"How will I know when it happens?" she asked.

"That, I don't know." Ford sighed. "I wish I could tell you that there's nothing to worry about, but this _is_ Bill we're talking about…" That wasn't really helping. He pulled her away from him. "Just...try to get some rest."

"But, what if Bill tries to...whatever while I'm asleep?"

Ford gripped the bottom of his shirt, needing to physically restrain himself from hugging her. Her fears perfectly mirrored the ones he had when he first discovered Bill's evil intentions. He didn't want Nadia to end up an insomniac/alcoholic, like him. Well, the alcoholism hadn't lasted long enough to be considered a severe problem, but still. He took her hand and squeezed it gently. He opened his mouth, but nothing came out, so he closed it. What was supposed to tell her, when he didn't even know the answer, himself?

But, Nadia just sighed. "I know I need sleep, but…" She shook her head clear. "You know what? Bill said he wasn't ready _yet_ , so maybe I'll be safe for tonight?" She gave him what was hopefully a reassuring smile, but it apparently wasn't, since all he did was frown deeper and shrug. She sighed. "I appreciate your honesty. Granted, it would be nice if you would lie and say that everything would turn out fine, but I don't like being lied to."

Ford nodded. "I know you don't. Nobody does."

"I just wish there was a way to block Bill out of my mind." She noticed Ford bite his lip. "Ford? Do you know a way to do that?"

Ford awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck. "Er… Do you know what alcohol is?" Nadia shook her head. "Well, it's a type of chemical back in my dimension. A kind that is typically put in certain types of beverages and, in some cases, foods."

Hope flared in Nadia's chest. "And, this alcohol, it can keep Bill from entering your mind?"

Ford flinched at her enthusiasm then remembered that she had never even heard of the substance before he'd brought it up. Why _had_ he brought it up, anyway? "Well, technically yes, but not without severe side effects." Nadia frowned. "Consuming small amounts in moderation is safe enough, but it won't keep Bill from entering your mind. The amount that can, however, results in some serious side effects. Take it from me; alcohol is _not_ the way to go about this."

Take it from him? What did he mean by that? Did he take too much once? Nadia could tell from his expression that this was a sore subject for him, so she didn't ask.

"Besides," he continued, "I know better than anyone that trying to avoid all your problems will only succeed in making them a thousand times worse."

"So, what do you suggest?" Nadia asked.

Ford sighed and stared up at the over-sized moon. "I don't know. I guess…" He grunted in frustration and placed a hand on his head, muttering under his breath, " _God_ , I _hate_ not knowing things!"

Nadia smirked, removed Ford's coat, and draped it back over its owner's shoulders, much to his surprise. Ford gave her a quizzical look, and she shrugged. "You looked colder than me." Ford rolled his eyes good-naturedly and pulled his arms through the sleeves. "I feel better now. Thanks for listening, Ford."

Ford saddened at her praise. "I didn't really say anything useful."

"Well, just talking to you made me feel better." The human smiled and looked away shyly. So fast that Nadia _almost_ didn't catch the slight darkening of his cheeks. Or, had she imagined it? She _was_ pretty tired, after all. The huge yawn that escaped her certainly proved that. "I think I'll go back to sleep. If Bill decides to pay another visit...I'll just deal with it, I guess."

"And, I'll be there for you."

The weight of his words and the intensity of his ocean-blue gaze sent a comforting warmth through her. In a sudden bout of affection, she reached up and kissed his cheek, her lips resting there a just hair longer than necessary. Ford tensed up in surprise, but she pulled away before he could register what she was doing.

"And, I'm grateful," she said before lying back down, a much more peaceful sleep coming almost instantly.

Ford, ever the insomniac, simply remained seated. The tenderness of her lips lingered on his hot skin. He pressed a hand to his cheek, wondering if it had really happened and trying to figure out what would possess her to do something so intimate. Had something literally possessed her? Was it a thank you? Did she feel something more than friendship towards him? Given his lack of a track record with women, that one was unlikely but still possible. His mouth quirked upwards slightly at the thought.

Unfortunately, his train of thought came to a screeching halt when his surroundings turned black and white. The telltale sign of…

An all too familiar figure twirled a black cane in its hand and lowered itself to Ford's level. "'Oh, no, it's Bill.' Right? Weren't you just thinking that?" **Bill** asked, his cane vanishing.

"What do you want this time, Cipher?" Ford demanded, the gun strapped to his belt feeling more tempting than usual.

"That's it?" Bill asked in mock hurt. "No, 'Hi Bill?' No, 'How's it going, Bill?' No, 'How's your big plan coming along, Bill?"

Oh, if that demon had physical form… Ford gritted his teeth. "What. Do. You. _Want_?"

Bill laughed. "Come on, Sixer. Have a sense of humor."

"Answer the question, you equilateral freak!"

"Very well. What I want, Stanford, is to give you a little warning."

Ford...hadn't expected that answer. "What kind of warning?"

Bill narrowed his eye. "A warning to not get in my way. I know you better than you think, Sixer. Better than you know yourself, even, so I know you'll do anything to save your girlfriend, over here." Ford blushed despite himself. "BUT KNOW THIS. Nadia's got more secrets than you may think. So, sit back, shut up, and let me do my thing, lest you see something you'll regret."

* * *

Ford blinked. Color had returned to his surroundings, and everything appeared as it had before Bill's appearance. Ford clenched his fists and breathed deeply. It was all he could do not to scream in fury. If that worthless nacho thought that he could hurt Nadia, he was beyond wrong! All his visit did was strengthen and reinforce Ford's vow to protect Nadia.

Nadia… Ford gazed down at her sleeping form. She looked so at peace, so oblivious of what had just occurred.

Ford brushed a stray hair from her face. "I'll protect you," he whispered. "I promise."

 **XPPY MQQP HQGPT GZF OINSPA...OZO'B XLLM L OFIW, JPC TOJWE!**

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 **Bill's on his way... Review!**


	18. Nadia's Labyrinth (Part One)

**Summary: Bill gives Nadia the ultimate nightmare, so Ford, Tad, and Starclops enter her mind to try and save her. Soon, they are all forced to take on their own fears and inner demons.**

 **From this point on, all ciphers will be decoded with the atbash cipher. I think this one will be my permanent decoder.**

 **Trigger Warning: Domestic abuse and mentions of rape.**

* * *

 **Chapter Seventeen: Nadia's Labyrinth (Part One)**

Ever since Nadia first confessed to making a deal with Bill, Ford hadn't slept much. Then, Bill had came to warn him about meddling, and sleep became nearly impossible. He had told his concerned friends that it was nothing more than textbook insomnia, but that was only part of it. The real reason was because he wanted to be on the lookout for any signs that Bill had infiltrated Nadia's mind. Unfortunately, he quickly realized, it was borderline impossible to tell the difference between an ordinary nightmare and one created by Bill. Still, Ford tried his hardest to stay awake. He was well-aware of how creepy it was to watch someone sleep - especially if that someone was of the opposite gender - but he remained as vigilant as he could. He knew enough about Bill to know that Nadia could be in serious danger.

Then came that fateful day that pushed his panic button.

One moment, Nadia had been perfectly normal (or at least as normal as a mutant from another dimension could be). She had been listening intently to his explanation on the ten categories of ghosts and suddenly her eyes flashed yellow and she'd collapsed in his arms. Then, Ford knew that Bill was doing...whatever Bill was doing.

After a futile attempt to wake the mutant up, Tad transported them all to Mighty Med. Horace had hooked up Nadia to a machine that would monitor her vitals and said that he would do whatever he could for her. Ford had no choice but to tell his friends about Nadia's deal with Bill, and Tad and Starclops immediately hopped into Nadia's dream. Thankfully, Ford remembered the incantation that could put himself in there as well.

That was how they had all wound up here.

As to what exactly "here" was… Well, Ford was open to suggestions.

The sky - or maybe the ceiling? - was pitch black. The stone walls were with lined moss and ivy and looked ancient. There was no visible light source, yet they all had no problem seeing. Still, even the atmosphere itself was creepy and unsettling.

"Where...are we?" Ford wondered aloud.

"I think I know what this is." Starclops uncharacteristically solemn tone set them all even more on edge if that was possible. "This is a Nightmare Labyrinth. Very advanced dream spell."

Nightmare Labyrinth? If the circumstances were different, Ford would have whipped out his journal. Alas, now was anything _but_ the time for documentations. He would take care of that later.

Tad's eyes narrowed in thought. "I've heard of that. It's, like, a compilation of one's greatest fears, right?"

Starclops nodded. "In a nutshell, yes. The Nightmare Labyrinth is just what it sounds like: a huge maze filled with the most horrifying and or heartbreaking things in a person's life."

As if Ford wasn't worried enough before… "We need to find Nadia. Let's split up. We'll cover more ground that way."

"But, how will we contact each other, if we find her?" Tad asked.

"I'm pretty good with my own dream magic," Starclops replied. "I could always move around some walls and make things easier. Probably." That answer was good enough for all of them. Just as they were about to head out, Starclops stopped them. "Wait. Before you idiots start scurrying off, there's you should know. Now that we're here, Bill's sure to sense us. That means he's going to try to break us by showing us the things _we're_ scared of. And, if he's as skilled at this as I fear, well, let's just say that it won't be pretty."

Ford briefly wondered how Starclops knew so much about this place, but now wasn't the time to ask. Nadia needed them.

* * *

The moment she'd shook Bill's hand, Nadia knew that she was in for something bad. She just hadn't expected anything quite like this. Not only was this place creepy in _every_ aspect of the word, but it seemed to be filled with images that purposely drove her insane.

It hadn't been so bad at first. Just a dark and disturbing maze that seemed to go on forever. There were some random ominous noises and the occasional triangle etched into the walls or dirt, but there wasn't anything she couldn't handle.

Needless to say, things only got worse.

It had started when she'd reached a dead end. Only, instead of a blank wall, the corridor had some kind of video playing on it. Where the images were coming from was anyone's guess. Unfortunately, this particular movie wasn't exactly the kind she was keen on seeing.

 _The girl in the alley was no older than eight. She was covered in cuts and bruises, and her torn clothes had been tossed aside, leaving her completely naked. Her shivers had nothing to do with the frigid air and everything to do with her uncontrollable sobs. Once she was sure that she was alone, she shakily grabbed her ratty sweatshirt and ripped jeans. She really wished she could find a pair of shoes or at least some socks. Once dressed, she simply curled up in the corner and cried._

 _She should have been used to this by now. Mutants, like her, were a waste of DNA. They weren't good for anything but hurting people. And, she was probably one of the worst. She didn't bother trying to heal her injuries with her powers. If anyone found her, they wouldn't try to help her either. If the bad man came back, maybe this time, she wouldn't fight him. After everything she'd done...maybe she_ deserved _to be molested._

Nadia couldn't watch anymore. She bolted as far from the memory as possible, tears trailing down her face. Little did she realize that the next dead end would soon prove to be worse than the last.

 _Mama and Daddy were vampires. Neither had expected a mutant baby. Mama was kind to her daughter, having seen firsthand what people did to mutants. She tried to keep Nadia sheltered, but Nadia wanted to go to kindergarten with the other vampires. Mama didn't like that idea, and Nadia was quick to figure out why. The teachers hated her but not nearly as openly as the students. Her peers bullied her mercilessly, and the teachers didn't stop them._

 _She had first discovered her ice powers, when she'd accidentally froze one of her tormentors solid._

 _She was expelled from kindergarten that day._

 _Mama was kind enough to homeschool her. Daddy didn't like that, didn't like his own daughter. He had fought in the Mutant War, so he didn't like mutants. Mama was more open-minded than that._

" _Your powers make you special," she'd constantly tell her daughter. "They don't make you good or bad. Only_ you _can make you good or bad."_

Nadia swallowed the lump that had wedged itself in her throat, as the memory played out before her. Needless to say, she still took her mother's words to heart.

 _Nadia had done her best to perfect her powers. She practiced whenever she got the chance._

 _Daddy didn't like that, either. He'd scream at her and beat her and-_

Nadia shivered.

 _-whip her a lot, especially when she practiced her powers. She never meant to retaliate. She knew she could generate ice and heal injuries with her hands, but she didn't know about_ that _power. It was an accident._

 _Mama wouldn't look her in the eye after that. Nadia had tried talk to her, but her mother wouldn't listen. Mama was screaming and crying and demanding that she put her hands in her pockets. The now seven-year-old Nadia was scared. She didn't think to listen to Mama and put her hands in her pockets. She didn't mean to do the deadly thing again._

 _She didn't mean to kill her parents…_

The memory miraculously stopped, and Nadia dropped to her knees and sobbed freely. She had _almost_ forgotten what a monster she was.

An ear-splitting _snap_ shattered her train of thought and her flipped her stomach over.

"Look at me!" someone demanded from behind. "Turn around, and look at me, bitch!"

Nadia forced a look over her shoulder. The sight of the angry vampire holding a whip made her insides turn into jelly. "Daddy…"

* * *

Ford called out Nadia's name, as he wandered through the maze, but he stopped when he reached a dead end. He grunted in frustration and was about to turn around, when the wall lit up, and a vision played on it.

" _My name is Fiddleford Hadron McGucket, and I wish to unsee what I have seen."_

Fiddleford? Unsee? Was Bill showing him the Society of the Blind Eye? Sure, it wasn't a great memory, but Ford had a lot of much worse ones that Bill could have chosen from.

Then, as the scene progressed, Ford realized why Bill was showing him this. It seemed that Fiddleford's memory gun worked, it seemed to work _too_ well. Ford didn't stay on Earth long enough to really see the effects of the gun, but obviously Bill was all-too happy to show him.

The scene ended with Fiddleford with a long white beard that had an inexplicable bandage on it, and he was yelling something unintelligible and laughing madly.

"Oh, Fids…" Ford breathed, too stunned to do anything but stand there. "What did you do to yourself…?"

But, it wasn't Fiddleford's fault. Ford felt responsible. If he hadn't asked Fiddleford to help him build the portal, that damn gun wouldn't have been built - probably - and Fiddleford-

Unless, Bill was lying? Maybe, Fiddleford wasn't really insane, and Bill was just trying to break Ford's spirit just like Starclops had warned him. Besides, Fiddleford looked pretty old in that last clip. Ford figured that he had probably been away from Earth for a few years now, but not nearly enough for Fids to be an old man.

...Right?

Ford didn't ponder that for long, because a sudden noise redirected his focus. It was either nearby or just really loud. He couldn't tell. Part of him wanted to follow the sound and see what caused it, mostly because it happened again. And, again. The more rational part of him reminded him that this place was created by Bill. There was no telling what that sound was.

The next time it happened, it was followed by a scream. The familiarity of it made up his mind.

* * *

Ford had found Nadia. He just wished he hadn't found her crouched on the ground, sobbing. A vampire that Ford didn't recognize tossed his whip aside and hoisted Nadia up by her hair, and she cried out in pain. The vampire shouted something at her in a language Ford didn't understand. Then, he clawed at Nadia's face with his free hand.

And, Ford's fury went through the roof. He ran to the vampire, who dropped Nadia when Ford grabbed him, and - not without a battle cry of "Left hook!" - punched him as hard as he could in the jaw. The vampire collapsed to the ground, and his body morphed into thousands of cockroaches that crawled away in various directions. Ford shuddered at the sight.

"Ford?" Nadia asked in surprise. She tried to stand up, but Ford just as quickly knelt down beside her. "How did- Why are you-"

But, Ford was too busy gazing worriedly at the blood spilling out from some torn spots on her clothes. "Nadia, you're hurt! Why aren't you healing yourself?"

"My powers aren't working."

Ford reached into a pocket of his trench coat and pulled out a small bottle of alcohol. "This'll hurt like hell, but it will help to prevent infection. At least, I think it will. I'm not entirely sure how your non-human body will respond to it. So, either it'll prevent infection, or you'll burst into flames. Or, you'll melt or disintegrate or- On second thought, forget I mentioned it."

Nadia stifled laughter, and Ford, as he tucked the bottle back into his pocket, would've smiled if she wasn't bleeding. Most of her wounds had already begun to clot, but the vampire had left three cuts on her cheek - including the scar that he'd reopened. Ford pulled his coat sleeve over his thumb and attempted to wipe away the blood and drying tears. His heart was in tatters at the sight of her. He'd known her for years now - probably - and he'd never seen her look so broken. Sure, she had her moments, mostly after Bill got a hold of her, but she was never like this. What in Hell's name had Bill done to her?

"Ford," she said at last, "I don't know how you got here or why-"

"Long story short, we all managed to enter your mind. I'll get into more detail later."

"We all?"

"The rest of the gang's here, too. Minus Echo. I wasn't sure if her small stature could handle the trip into the mindscape. Anyway, we brought you to Mighty Med, and Horace hooked you up to a machine that's monitoring your vitals."

Nadia let that information sink in. Her friends had brought her to Mighty Med, Horace and Echo were probably looking after her, and the others had taken the risk of coming here to save her. Nadia's eyes stung, and she bit her lip in an attempt to compose herself. She didn't deserve their concern. They shouldn't have been risking so much for someone like _her_.

A tear slid from her long eyelashes, and Ford smiled sadly, mistaking her self-loathing for fear. He wiped her tear away. "I know you're scared, Nadia. We all are. But, I made a promise to protect you from Bill, and I'm going to keep it, no matter what."

 _He's lying, you know,_ a voice said. Nadia sort of recognized it. It simultaneously was and wasn't her own voice. _He doesn't care. Why would he? Who would genuinely care for someone who mutilated her own parents? Why would Stanford Pines - a kind, brave, intelligent man - care for Nadia Blackburne - a freak of nature who can't do anything right except cause problems?_

Ford held Nadia close as she cried. He was completely oblivious of what was going on in her head and what Bill had done to cause it. The only thing he knew for sure was that Bill was going to pay, one way or another.

"F-Ford?" Nadia croaked into his shoulder.

Ford stroked her hair, which, these days, hung well-past her shoulders, and gently shushed her. "Just breathe, Nadia. It's okay. We'll find Tad and Starclops and be out of here in no time."

Nadia sniffed. "Do-Do you really...care for me, like you say?"

The question caught Ford off-guard, and he pulled her back a little to look her in the eyes. "Um, care to elaborate?"

The moment the question was out of her mouth, Nadia wished she could take it back. "I just… I wanna know. You've been nothing but sweet to me, and I don't even deserve it, so-"

"Of course you deserve it."

"No, Stanford. I don't." The finality in her tone shut him up. The break in her voice and the wetness of her eyes made him want to hug her again. "You don't know what I've done, and you don't know what I'm capable of."

It took a moment for Ford to find his voice. When he did, he hoped it came out alright. "You know what I _do_ know?" Nadia looked away, and Ford tilted her chin to face him. "I know that when I first came through the portal, I didn't know whether or not I could trust you. You claimed to have saved me, but… You have to understand, Nadia. Until I'd met Bill, I hadn't even known it was possible to travel across the multiverse. No one in my dimension had even heard of inter-dimensional travel."

"Really?" And, here Nadia thought it was well-known throughout the multiverse.

"No joke. My dimension, I now realize, is not quite as advanced as some places I've seen. In fact-" He blushed. "I-I'm rambling, aren't I? Sorry." Nadia chuckled. It felt great to see her smile again. "The point is, I was unaccustomed to the world I'd literally fallen into, so I didn't know if your intentions were as good as you claimed." Then, his tone softened as he felt himself get trapped in the depths of her lavender eyes, and his heart swelled as it emptied its contents into his words. "Once I got to know you, I discovered who you really are."

Nadia was so transfixed, she could barely breathe. "Who am I?"

Ford's eyes briefly wandered to her lips, and he mentally scolded himself for it and focused on answering her question. Who was she? Someone beautiful, kind, passionate, loyal, adventurous…

Was there really a time when he thought that _pheromones_ could make him feel this way?

"You're someone who helped me learn to trust again," he said finally.

Nadia whispered, "Stanford…" because it was all that she could get out of her mouth. She loved him. God, she loved him, and she wanted so badly to believe his words. Maybe it was Bill's doing, but she still had doubts. "Do you mean all that?"

Ford cupped her cheek. Even with dried blood on her face and some in her hair, she was still the most beautiful woman he'd ever met. "I do, Nadia."

They forgot about the labyrinth, forgot that Bill might be watching them, forgot every bad thing in existence. When their lips collided, the feeling was more magical than anything Ford could have studied. They wished it didn't have to end, but they had to breathe some time.

When, they pulled away, bliss visible on both of their faces, Ford said with renewed vigor, "Why don't we go find the others?"

"Getting right down to business, eh?" Nadia teased. Ford shrugged, and she giggled and stood up, Ford following suit. Nadia took his hand and grinned when his face darkened in color. "So where do we start looking?"

Ford clicked his tongue in thought. "Excellent question." He glanced down the eight paths before them. Nadia somehow stopped herself from laughing, when he pointed to each one in turn and said, "Eeny, meeny, miney- Eh, let's just take this one."

 **GIFV OLEV XLMJFVIH ZOO...FMWVI GSV IRTSG XRIXFNHGZMXVH.**

* * *

Remember, folks _atbash_ cipher.

Hey, during their conversation, was I the only thinking wishing that Ford would just shut up and kiss her? I kind of doubt I was the only one thinking that. Anyway, review!


	19. Bad Days

**I'm sure you're all eager to find out how everyone gets out of the labyrinth. Well, you're gonna have to wait. I was gonna wait to post this chapter, but I thought a bit more background was necessary. Plus, you'll be like, "Whaaa?" after you read this. I hope.**

 **Also, anyone who has read Rin Chupeco's _The Girl From the Well_ and or its sequel, _The Suffering_ may recognize the structure of some of Bill's thoughts.**

 **Trigger Warning: Addiction and withdrawal, but it's not for anything that exists in our dimension. And, I figured that, since this involves something I made up, the withdrawal symptoms could pretty much be whatever I want, right?**

* * *

 **Chapter Eighteen: Bad Days**

Bill Cipher had good days. On good days, he would wreak havoc or hang out with his fellow interdimensional criminals or simply spy on random people. You know, garden variety evil demon things. On those days, he didn't need too much of the elixir, if any. He was calm, collected, and himself.

Of course, for there to be good days, there had to be bad days as well.

Bad days ranged from mild discomfort to Bill wanting to just frigging die. He didn't understand those days. He knew he wasn't sick; at least, he didn't think he was sick. All he knew was that bad days brought on cravings and pain and overwhelming thoughts of _her_.

Stella "Starclops" Cipher. Beelzebub, he missed his wife. Well, _ex_ -wife, as she would constantly remind him. It was customary for the man to take the woman's last name after marriage. After she'd divorced him, he couldn't bare to return to calling himself William "Bill" _Atbash_. It sounded wrong. Like, someone who had made the biggest mistake of his life. What that mistake was, he couldn't quite remember. Was it saying yes? (The women of his kind were usually the ones who popped the question.) Bill scoffed at the thought. He would have said yes a thousand times over. So, what was his mistake? Whatever it was, he knew it was the cause of Stella hating him, and that was reason enough to call it the biggest fucking mistake of his life.

Damn, he needed a drink. When was his last drink?

A voice echoed in his mind and drilled a hole through his heart. " _If you love me, you'll put down the friggin' bottle!"_

Maybe, he didn't need a drink.

There was one thing that Bill was still grateful for. His friends didn't understand his bad days any more than he did, but they cared for him nonetheless. Bill didn't want them to drop everything for him, but they didn't seem to mind. If anything, it kept them from getting themselves back in jail. He would usually try to maintain some dignity by telling him that he could take care of himself. They never listened. No matter. On the _really_ bad days, it was a lie, anyway. Bill laughed. He'd do anything for those basket-cases, and they'd do anything for him.

Although, things sometimes got awkward when Pyronica looked after him. The devil had a crush on him, so some awkwardness was inevitable. Bill loved Pyronica _as a friend_ , but he knew that he would never feel anything beyond that. Fortunately, she seemed to understand that and didn't try to pressure him into anything he wasn't comfortable with. If things were different, Bill could easily see himself liking her the way she liked him. Pyronica was clever, witty, and fun-loving, like him.

But, no one could replace his feisty little comet.

His body grew frighteningly hot then unnaturally cold and kept repeating the cycle.

He didn't need a drink.

The voices filled his head.

 _wirmp wirmp uriv yollw kzrm wirmp hzeztv WRV WRV WRV WRV_

He loved her, so he put down the bottle.

 _sfmtvi kzrm xib wirmp ylggov wvzgs WIRMP_

No! Stella was wrong! He was _not_ addicted!

 _WIRMPWIRMPWIRMPWIRMP_

He drank.

His breathing steadied, and the voices were silenced. He felt immensely better. Physically, at least. However, he knew was that by giving in, he had failed his beloved.

Bill hated bad days.

 **ULI HLNV ZWWRXGH, RG RH ZOIVZWB GLL OZGV.**

* * *

 **Whoa... That turned out a lot more angst-y than I expected. But, I bet you're all like, "Whaaa?" right now, huh? Don't worry. We'll get back to the labyrinth in the next chapter. I just really wanted to get this out there. Review!**


	20. Nadia's Labyrinth (Part Two)

**Summary:** **Bill gives Nadia the ultimate nightmare, so Ford, Tad, and Starclops enter her mind to try and save her. Soon, they are all forced to take on their own fears and inner demons.**

 **This part's short, but it's got a lot going on. Those of you who have been following along with the rest of this fic may be confused at one point while reading this. I assure you, everything will be explained.**

 **Eventually.**

* * *

 **Chapter Nineteen: Nadia's Labyrinth (Part Two)**

Echo wished that she could have gone in Nadia's mind and helped, but Ford had a point. Nobody really seemed to know if it was safe for a non- dream-oriented creature as small as her to enter the mindscape. Apparently, it was _barely_ safe enough for someone as big as Ford. So, Echo settled for watching over Nadia's physical form. Not that the snark minded. Horace had other patients to look after, and who knew how Bill would affect Nadia outside of the mindscape?

Nadia suddenly started bleeding. Echo ran to find Horace. Fortunately, it didn't take long. Horace was in the next room.

"Good news!" he was telling a man in a hospital bed. "I can cure you!" The man smiled, and Horace walked of the room, closed the door, and said _way_ too enthusiastically, "He's gonna die!"

Maybe, she should find another doctor…

But, then Horace noticed her and crouched down next to her. "Hello, Echo. How's Nadia doing?"

Echo started to explain, but she quickly remembered that the "doctor" couldn't understand her.

To surprise, Horace simply nodded. "I have a big problem with what you're saying: I have no idea what you're saying! Wait here." He reentered the room and said to the superhero in the bed, "Mechanic, before you d-" He cleared his throat. "Before I _cure you_ , I need you to make some sort of device," Echo ran to his side, and Horace picked her up, "for this snark. I need something that can turn what she says into English. Oh, and make it a pink ribbon. She'd look absolutely adorable!"

Echo couldn't argue with that. Mechanic clenched his fist for a moment then opened it. A small pink ribbon rested in his palm. If Echo wasn't so used to weird things happening, she probably would have been impressed. She jumped into Mechanic's hand, grabbed the ribbon, and tied it around her neck, figuring that it would look best there. She tried speaking.

"Mzwrz dzh urmv, yfg gsvm hsv hgzigvw yovvwrmt uli hlnv ivzhlm-" Echo shut her mouth. Hell, even _she_ didn't know what she was saying.

Horace glared at Mechanic in exasperation. "I said _English_. Not Atbash! My Atbash is so rusty, it almost sounded like she said that Nadia Blackburne started bleeding for an unknown reason."

Echo seriously considered biting him. In the lower region.

* * *

Tad Strange wasn't all that good with dreams. He could enter them and watch them play out, but that was the easy part. The hard part was manipulating them. It wasn't that he wasn't able to; all dream demons were more than capable of doing just that. He just never saw any reason to practice. Although, times like this made him wish he was as good at Dream Bending as Starclops. He really wished she was with him, because, for the life of him, he didn't have a clue where he was going. The demoness had probably found both Nadia _and_ Ford by now.

He let the thought comfort him. Starclops was incredibly gifted when it came to dreams, so she had probably already pinpointed his location. Perhaps, he'd just wait where he was for her. It was certainly a better option than finding out what hell lurked in this labyrinth. On the other hand, what if he was wrong, and his friends were just as lost as him?

He decided that floating in one spot wasn't getting him anywhere. So, he wandered around some more. Until, he heard a familiar crackling sound. He stopped, looked around, and shrugged. There was nothing there. The sound _had_ been rather faint. Maybe, he'd imagined it. Then, it came again, louder this time. A gray cloud crawled toward him.

No, not a cloud.

Oh, hell.

A wave of red-orange slowly made its way toward him, as though intentionally dragging out his suffering. Fear and panic and a familiar lust all fought for dominance, as the flames made their way closer. Tad tried to fly in the other direction, but fire was blocking all potential exits. He was trapped. Tad tried desperately to transport himself away, but he somehow couldn't. Why, _why_ , hadn't he practiced Dream Bending, when he'd had the chance?

 _yfim yfim uovhs hvzi gsvri uovhs gsriw ulfigs wvtivv_

His mind was turning against him. He needed to fight it. It wasn't real. None of this was. But, it was so damn _real_. He had to remember The Big Fire. He could _not_ let that happen again.

But, the flames were so pretty.

And, so powerful.

And, the smoke was so intoxicating.

And-

And, dear Beelzebub, what was he thinking!?

Not knowing what else to do, Tad shut his eyes and tried to concentrate on anything that _wasn't_ this.

 _hnlpv uoziv uoznvh yfim hrmtv uriv_

Tad tried to call for help, but his voice was numb. Everything but the beautiful and dangerous flames made everything else around him seem insignificant.

 **UVZI SZH GL XLNV UILN HLNVDSVIV, IRTSG?**

* * *

 **Are you confused? I think you might be. I will explain in time... But, until that happens, you all can review!**


	21. Nadia's Labyrinth (Part Three)

**Summary:** **Bill gives Nadia the ultimate nightmare, so Ford, Tad, and Starclops enter her mind to try and save her. Soon, they are all forced to take on their own fears and inner demons.**

 **I wanna point out something. Bill is _intentionally_ OOC. Oh, he's still nuts, but he isn't completely gone yet. At this point, he still has some...humanity, for lack of a better word. His breaking point probably won't be for a while. Maybe not until Season Two or even Three.**

* * *

 **Chapter Twenty: Nadia's Labyrinth (Part Three)**

Ford's brain was working overtime, as he and Nadia searched that labyrinth for their demon-friends. He and Nadia had kissed, and the latter had tasted like bubble gum and smelled like rainwater (a surprisingly intoxicating combination). Now, they were holding hands…

Now, what? Did that make them boyfriend and girlfriend? Perhaps he would ask when they were out of the nightmare.

Ford _really_ wished he had more experience with women. Alas, before now, the closest he'd ever come to romance was kissing a girl on the lips during a game of Truth or Dare. It didn't help that the girl was his cousin.

He noticed that Nadia still seemed upset. This was understandable, given the circumstances, but he had a feeling it went deeper than just a fear of the unknown. "Uh, Nadia," Ford started tentatively. He awkwardly scratched the back of his neck. "I-If this is too personal, you don't have to answer, but… Er, who-who was that vampire back there?"

Nadia stopped walking and tightened her grip on Ford's hand, as though she needed more support. Ford saddened when it seemed that she was purposely avoiding eye contact.

Then, he felt frozen to the floor when she almost inaudibly said, "My daddy."

Ford responded with, "Oh," because that had been all he could force out of his mouth.

Nadia let go of his hand and crossed her arms, still staring down at her shoes. "He...fought against some mutants in a war. He didn't like me very much."

Ford's heart went out to her. Sensing that she didn't want to be touched right now, he put his hands in his coat pockets. "You know, I know what it's like to be hated for who you are."

Nadia laughed bitterly. "Please. You? You're so smart and nice. Everyone must have loved you."

Ford almost laughed at the assumption. "I could say the same about you." Nadia didn't respond. "Nadia, as you well know," he pulled his hands out of his pockets and held them up, "I have six fingers on each hand."

Finally looking at him, Nadia shrugged. "So?"

"Well, the majority of my kind have five on each hand. But, I was born with a rare birth defect, called polydactyly, which gave me extra fingers. Growing up, I was constantly ridiculed for it. And, it certainly didn't help that everyone liked to pick on the smart kid."

"Why would anyone bully a smart person?"

"Nadia, your guess is as good as mine. Anyway, I may not know what it's like to be abused by your parents," physically anyway - his father was...blunt, to say the least, "but I do have some understanding of your predicament. At least, I think I do. I apologize if I'm just making things worse."

Nadia shook her head and smiled. "You're not making things worse, Ford. Talking to you makes me feel better, actually. It's one of the things I love about you."

"Oh, uh, g-good." Ford blushed at the compliment.

Someone cleared their throat. Ford looked to the side and-

 _This isn't real, Stanford,_ he told himself, fighting a sudden jolt of anxiety. _It's just an illusion. Bill is just messing with you. Your brother is definitely_ not _standing there._

Unintentionally strengthening his fear, a stunned Nadia looked between the two humans and said, "There's _two_ of you?"

* * *

The tree - despite being as bleak and depressing as the rest of the maze - seemed out of place in the stone labyrinth, but it made for a great vantage point. Bill Cipher rested on the very top branch, sipping a glass of a purple liquid, as he admired his work. Not bad. He'd been going for a realm filled to the brim with fear and heartbreak, but it was his first Nightmare Labyrinth. He hadn't expected it to be perfect.

Transporting away his now-empty glass, Bill waved his hand, and a large cloud appeared before him. An image played out like a movie screen. This was how Bill was monitoring Nadia's torment, so that he could see what aspects of the spell he still needed to improve on. Except, three other beings had found their way in here. He could feel their presence, though he couldn't tell who they were. No matter; they would be tortured just the same.

He pulled up one of the beings. Bill was hardly surprised to find Tad Strange; the guy _was_ a dream demon after all, and he _did_ care about Nadia enough to try to play hero. Which was failing miserably, since he was curled up in a fetal position on the ground, surrounded by...fire? Odd. Bill could have sworn the fellow was pyromanic. Maybe, Bill was thinking of someone else. He knew someone like that… Pyronica! That was the pyromaniac in his life. Tad was scared to death of the stuff. Why that was, Bill was clueless.

He flipped to the next image. _There_ was Nadia. And...was that Six Fingers? Yep, definitely him. Crescent was there too, but he was an illusion from the labyrinth. Bill watched with interest, as Crescent berated his twin for leaving him behind and putting research before family and other sap like that. Six Fingers was noticeably upset. Nadia (the cuts and bruises on her showed that the spell had clearly done _something_ to her) was trying get Crescent away. Bill rolled his eye at her pathetic attempt and flipped to the last intruder.

It was-

It was…

"Frigging hell!"

* * *

The maze was bigger than she'd expected; then again, Bill had always been a hard-worker. Starclops studied the map that she'd manifested… There. There was the exit. And, there were her friends, too. Two of the little dots on the "screen" told her that Nadia and Ford were together, so that was one good thing. Her friends were the blue dots, and they weren't far from her; also good. The red dots were all the evil illusions. Needless to say, there was a whole mess of those. It was a decent job, for a (hopefully) first-timer, but Starclops could see where her ex went wrong. Ordinarily, a Dream Labyrinth - Nightmare or otherwise - would be a lot smaller, allowing for the creatures inside to find their target easier. Bill's version was far too big.

Amateurs were adorable.

"What are you doing here?"

Starclops's heart flipped upside-down at the voice, and she transported away her map, allowing a full view of someone she had been expecting to see. And, hoping to avoid.

Not only that, but the bastard had the nerve to look concerned. "You of all people should know how dangerous this place is! Get out of here, before you run into something crazy!"

Starclops laughed bitterly. "Like you care what happens to me."

Bill just _barely_ flinched. "Of course I care-"

"Get away from me."

"Stella-"

"Don't 'Stella' me!" she snapped. Because, sweet Beelzebub, he had crossed a line he couldn't step back over! "You've gone too far, Bill! Creating a Nightmare Labyrinth is one thing, but Nadia has no quarrel with you! And, don't you _dare_ bring up your effed up little _deal_! 'Cause, guess what, Dorito Boy. I've made deals before. I've asked for dream-practice before. You wanna practice on my family? Fine! I don't give two damns! But, _this_!?" She shook her head, and what came out of her was somewhere between a laugh and a sob. "This isn't like you."

Bill didn't speak. He wasn't sure what to say.

"I loved you, you know," Starclops blurted out. Now that she'd started, she couldn't seem to stop. "I really, _truly_ loved you. But, now… Now, I don't even know who you are." She shoved him out of her way, but he grabbed her arm and looked her in the eye. "What?"

"Stella, I love you," he blurted, because it was the only thing he could think to say. So, why did saying it break his heart?

Starclops yanked her arm away and choked out, "Don't touch me." She bolted, and Bill went after her.

The problem with the Dream Labyrinth is that you can't control what creatures appear in it. It's all stemmed from the minds of those inside the dream. The only one who isn't affected is the spell caster.

Which was odd, since what Starclops found also shook Bill to the core.

 **GSV NLMHGVIH LU GSV KZHG WLM'G SLOW Z XZMWOV GL GSV NLMHGVIH LU GSV UFGFIV.**

* * *

This episode is longer than I'd anticipated. I loves it! :D

Let's see... If this was a real spin-off series, I think the two-and-three-part ones would be half-hour episodes, the one-shots would be eleven minutes, and this one would be an hour-long special.

Review, and all the jazz!


	22. Nadia's Labyrinth (Part Four)

**Summary:** **Bill gives Nadia the ultimate nightmare, so Ford, Tad, and Starclops enter her mind to try and save her. Soon, they are all forced to take on their own fears and inner demons.**

 **Last part of the labyrinth. Let's see what freaked Bill out so badly!**

* * *

 **Chapter Twenty-One: Nadia's Labyrinth (Part Four)**

Starclops could sense that it was an illusion, but that didn't mean she wasn't confused by it. Although the creature definitely freaked her out, it wasn't really that terrifying. Until, of course, it started talking.

"Ah, the original One-Eyed Star. I've been waiting AN ETERNITY for a chat face-to-face."

Starclops wondered what he was talking about (specifically, calling her the "original one-eyed star"). "Bill, I literally just saw you. Well, the real you, anyway. And, he obviously messed this spell up even more than I thought, if this is all the terror I get to see today." She scoffed at the absurdity of it. "A Bill illusion. A Billusion, if you will."

Billusion laughed. "Ha ha! Good one! I like it! But, seriously, I'm not quite the Bill you know."

"What are you talking about? More importantly, why should I listen to you? You're just a make-believe nutcase from my subconscious. What do you know about the future?"

"Ouch. That hurt." He didn't seem to mean it. "No matter. Let's just get down to business. Truth be told, I'm _nothing_ like the Bill you're familiar with. You always knew that the elixir Bill made was trouble, and I'm everything you fear he'll become. Hey, wanna know what happens when a star falls?" Before Starclops had time to process what was happening, Billusion raised her up high. "Let me show you!"

She was shot into the stone wall, bounced off it, and slammed into the ground. She thought she heard someone call her name just before she slipped into darkness.

* * *

Ford grunted in pain, when his brother kicked him into the wall. Stanley Pines grabbed his shoulders, pinning him there. Ford didn't fight it; he knew deserved everything he was getting.

"You're a selfish bastard," Stan growled, "and all you ever cared about was your dumb collage and your dumb smartass nerd junk!" Nadia nailed him in face with a well-aimed punch, knocking him off his six-fingered brother. "What the hell, lady!?"

Nadia, seething, stood protectively in front of Ford. "Don't come anywhere near him!"

Stan groaned in annoyance. "Listen, it ain't my fault that Poindexter over here," he glared pointedly at Ford, who looked away and tried desperately not to start crying, "shut out our entire family, trusted some freaky nightmare-nacho-"

Nadia tried to claw at Stan's face, but the latter was faster and much larger than the petite mutant. He slammed his fist into her breast, and she collapsed, shouting out in pain. Ford cringed at the sight; he'd heard that a woman's breasts were as tender as a man's groin (and he knew what _that_ felt). His blood boiled over, as Stan simply laughed at her pain. A laugh that had the slightest Bill-like quality to it. And, speaking of groins, that's exactly where Ford kicked him. Stan fell to his knees, his hands clutching his crotch.

Ford knelt in front of him, reveling in the illusion's agony. "Since you're an illusion, and not my actual brother, I have no problems with calling you a _son of a fucking bitch_!" He launched his fist into Stan's face and sent him crumbling to the ground. The illusion morphed into hundreds of cockroaches, all of which crawled away in various directions.

Ford simply stood there, his heart in pieces. Illusion or not, he couldn't deny anything his brother told him. And, he hated himself for it.

Nadia shakily stood up. "Are you okay?"

No. He was everything _except_ okay. But, Nadia was his top priority right now; he couldn't help noticing how her arms were crossed, as though she was trying to protect her injured breast. "Are you?"

She frowned deeper. "You're crying, and you're asking if _I'm_ okay?" He was crying? When had that happened? Ford didn't object when she removed his glasses and wiped his wet cheeks. "It's okay now, Ford. That was just an illusion."

Ford opened his mouth to say that he was fine, but the sob that came out instead told Nadia the truth. She wrapped her arms around him, and Ford returned the gesture, his tears falling on her hair. He wished he could agree with her. He wished it was nothing but lies.

"N-Nadia," he choked.

The mutant gently shushed him and tightened her embrace. "Just breathe, Stanford. It's okay."

He didn't want to tell her the truth, but she needed to know. Especially after what just happened. He couldn't hide something like this from her. He reluctantly pulled away and wiped his eyes and nose on his sleeve. "Nadia, that-that was all true. Everything he said was true. I shut everyone out, my own twin became homeless because of me, Fiddleford's losing his mind-" Dammit, he was crying again. Why the hell did emotions have to exist? "Oh God, I'm a horrible person."

"Don't talk like that," Nadia pleaded. "Would I have fallen for someone bad? Would a bad person risk himself to protect the people he cares about? You're a great person, Ford. Maybe you made some mistakes, but who hasn't?"

 _Some_ mistakes? "You have no idea what I've done."

"I've done bad things, too. Everybody has something they regret." She placed his glasses back on his face and frowned, suddenly unwilling to look him in the eye. "Me, more than most people."

Ford adjusted his glasses, not wanting to show how much her change in demeanor alarmed him. "What do you mean?"

Nadia self-consciously rubbed her arm. She didn't want to lie, but was she ready to tell him about her parents? "I'll...I-I'll tell you after we get out of here."

"Alright." Ford kissed her forehead. Girls liked that, right? Apparently, since a small smile curved Nadia's lips. "No rush. Whatever you're thinking about, you can tell me when you're ready."

His understanding sent soft flutters through Nadia's belly. "Thank you. Now, why don't we go find the others?"

* * *

"Stella!" Bill cried out in horror, when he saw his beloved unconscious on the ground.

The creature that looked like him turned around. "Well, well, well, and here I thought today couldn't get any _better_!" Glowing blue chains locked around Bill's wrists and ankles, and struggled futilely to be loose. "So, the old me's come to save his girlfriend, eh? Adorable!"

"What are you talking about?" Bill demanded. "What the frack _are_ you?"

Billusion only laughed. Bill inwardly cringed at the madness in the sound. "I forgot how cute I was! I'm you, dumb-ass! I'm what you'll become! Just look at this gorgeous three-dimensional form!" The illusion spun around, revealing how much more pyramid-like it was than Bill. "And, wait until you find out about Weirdmageddon! I'd tell you, but it'll be more fun if you find out on your own. But, I'm getting ahead of ourselves. Let's relax." He manifested an old couch and sat Bill on it, simultaneously removing his chains (except for one around his ankle). "Fun fact: that couch is made from living human skin."

With a frightened shriek, Bill leaped into the air, as the "couch's" eyes opened, and a tongue popped out from under the middle cushion. Bill stared in horror at the illusion. It _was_ just an illusion, right? "You're insane!"

Billusion laughed, and the couch disappeared. "You mean, _we're_ insane!" Starclops groaned behind him and carefully pick herself. "Ah, perfect timing." He transported her next to Bill, and a chain wrapped around her midsection. "Glad to see you're awake, cutie. Now, I can tell you all about what good ol' Billy here is going to become."

"Stella, don't listen to anything he tells you," Bill pleaded.

Starclops glanced at him warily.

Billusion ignored the other him's protests. "He will be the most powerful being in the multiverse. Omnipotent! Immortal!" The Cipher Wheel appeared around the illusion, "Nothing and no one will ever get in his way again!" and shattered, the pieces vanishing without a trace.

Bill stared in dismay at the terror in Starclops's eye. "Stella...I-I'll never be him."

"Haha! You're already on the path to it, bub!" Billusion laughed. "Remember, when you told Six Fingers about the portal?"

"I was trying to help with his research!"

"I know, but here's something that happened when you were juiced up with elixir!"

Billusion's body turned into turned into some sort of screen.

" _Bill! You lied to me! Where does that portal really lead?"_

" _Let's just that, when that portal finishes charging up, your dimension is gonna learn how to party!"_

" _No! I'll stop you! I'll shut it down!"_

" _You can't stop a bridge between our worlds from coming, but it would be fun to watch you try! Cute, even!"_

Bill refused to believe it. Sure, he sometimes had gaps in his memory from the elixir, but there was no way-

"ENOUGH!" Starclops shouted.

Suddenly, the entire labyrinth faded to white.

* * *

Echo had been watching over Nadia, when the air around the latter rippled, and Ford and Tad exploded out her. Tad slammed into the ceiling and Ford into the wall. "What the heck just happened!?" Echo demanded.

Tad was the first to recover. "I'm not sure."

Ford grunted and forced himself to his feet. "Also, do I have a concussion, or did Echo just talk?"

Echo shrugged. "It's probably both. Hey, where's Starclops?"

* * *

Bill gazed around, but there was really no reason to. There was nothing but white for miles. He had forgotten how powerful she was.

"For the record, I could've done that at any time," Starclops stated. "I just didn't wanna scare my friends."

"Stella…" Bill was shaken but not by the demoness's power. "You don't...think I'll actually become... _that_ , do you?"

Starclops crossed her arms, as though that would somehow keep her heart from breaking at his genuine fear. "You made the elixir, Bill. If you do turn into that, it'll be your own fault." At that, she threw him out of Nadia's mind.

* * *

Starclops materialized in the room, and Nadia groggily opened her eyes.

"Nadia!" Ford was the first to notice. He crouched down beside her and took her hand in both of his. "Nadia, how do you feel?"

"Okay, I guess," Nadia said. "But, my head kinda hurts."

"I'll find Horace and tell him you're awake," Tad said as he burst through the doors.

Echo climbed on to the bed with a smirk. "Okay, I don't know what happened, but you two are holding hands, so somebody better start explaining."

Nadia just stared at her in shock. "I-I think I'm hallucinating, because I _swear_ I just heard Echo talk."

Echo winked. "Get used to it, Nad."

"Nad?"

She adjusted her bow for emphasis. "This is a translator Horace gave me. Now that I can talk. I'm going to say a whole freaking _lot_." Ford and Nadia exchanged uneasy looks, and Echo noticed something. "Hey, Starclops, you okay? I expected _you_ , of all creatures, to say something rude about that."

Starclops turned away. "I ain't in the mood. I'm gonna get some air."

"There's air right here."

"This air annoys me." She vanished, leaving her confused friends to wonder what was going on.

 **MLG ZOO NRMWH DROO HFIEREV GSV NZPRMT LU GSRH UZMURXGRLM.**

* * *

 **The next chapter will show what happens directly after this chapter. Review!**

 **And, hey, I decided to try something new. I've created a forum on here called "Ask Me Lots of Things!" Remember that Bill Cipher AMA on Reddit? Well, this is kind of like that. You can Bill questions about this fanfiction (or about anything else, really), and I, as Bill, will answer! The link is on my profile, if you're interested.**


	23. Aftermath

**And, now let us reflect on what has happened in the previous episode. Also, I based the MindScape after Summerland from "The Immortals" series by Alyson Noel.**

* * *

 **Chapter Twenty-Two: Aftermath**

"Can't sleep?"

Nadia looked up from her sketchbook and saw Ford standing in the doorway. Horace had suggested that they all stay there overnight just in case there were any side effects of Bill's infiltration. She wasn't sure if this counted as a side effect, but she was a little afraid to sleep.

She shook her head. "Not really. You?"

Ford sighed. "'Fraid not." Nadia shifted to the edge of her bed, sat her sketch book on her pillow, and patted the spot next to her. Ford walked in and sat down. "I, uh, I've been wondering." He blushed. "We-We kissed, so… Are we like...together now?"

Nadia giggled at how adorably embarrassed he was. "I'm pretty sure."

Ford smiled. "Good." He laughed. "So, now what? Do I, like, meet your parents, or something?" It had been a joke, but Nadia's face saddened, and she stared down at her feet. Ford's mind reeled, trying to figure out what he'd said wrong. He'd simply asked if he'd have to meet- "Unless...I can't…?"

Maybe now was as good a time to tell him as any. "Ford, remember when I said I had something to tell you?"

"Nadia, if you're not comfortable, you don't have to-"

"No. I should say this before I lose my nerve." She drew in a breath. "When I was little, I was just learning to use my powers. And, my dad was yelling at me a-and hitting me, and I...well…" Ford wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. Nadia blinked rapidly. She'd been crying enough lately. She rested her head on Ford's chest and let the steady beat of his heart calm her. "I got scared, and I...sort of…" She tried to lose herself in his arms, hoping it would restore some of her nerve.

Then, Ford kissed her head and said, "Take your time, Nadia. I'm not going anywhere."

Nadia closed her eyes and breathed in his earthy scent. She took comfort in knowing that Stanford was here, holding her- Her stomach twisted with another thought. Would he still be holding her if he knew that she was a monster? She pulled back slightly and gazed up at him. He looked at her with a comforting smile on his face and his ocean-colored eyes twinkling with love. That was when she got her nerve back.

"Ford, I…" She drew in a breath, suddenly unable to look him in the eye. "I killed him."

Her heart quivered when Ford stiffened, and he said uncertainly, "I, um… I was not expecting that."

Nadia swallowed the knot that had wedged itself in her throat. Hell, she'd come this far. May as well tell him the rest, right? "My mom got scared and started yelling, a-and I got scared, and…" She wiped the tears from her eyes. "Ford, I killed my parents."

"Jesus Christ…" Ford breathed in shock.

The silence hung too long, and Nadia bit her lip to keep from screaming. That was it. He was going to push her away and call her a murderer. She braced herself for it, but it didn't come. Nothing came. He was still silent, still holding her. Why wasn't he reacting? She looked up at him. He wasn't looking at her; his eyes were narrowed at something she couldn't see. Nadia recognized that look. Ford always looked like that when he was thinking hard about something. So, she gave him some time to think. Even though the silence was killing her.

When he finally spoke, his tone suggested that he was still analyzing this new information. "So, you were young and frightened and lost control of your abilities, if I'm interpreting this correctly."

Nadia nodded, wishing that he would finish thinking so that he could look her in the eye. Maybe he just didn't want to look at her. She tried to push the thought aside. "Y-Yes. Yes, that's right."

"And, you obviously feel remorse for it."

"Of course." Actually, "remorse" was sugar-coating it.

Her chest lunged when Ford pulled away from her and cupped his chin in his hand. He was the only person Nadia knew who would attempt to go over every little detail until he could find a result. "And, it was an accident."

It was a statement, not a question, and Nadia was relieved. "It was."

Ford sighed through his nose and finally looked at her. "Well, from the sound of things, you were simply a scared little kid, still trying to figure out your abilities. Am I okay with the idea of you...doing what you did? Honestly, it kinda freaks me out." Nadia swallowed thickly. "But, clearly you had no intention of doing anything of the sort, so...I guess I can live with the knowledge. Like you said, everyone has something they regret." He smiled softly. "Afterall, I know you well enough to know that you're the sweetest person I've ever had the pleasure of meeting."

Feeling immensely better, Nadia blushed at the compliment. "You're exaggerating."

"On the contrary, my dear, I rarely exaggerate." Then, Ford realized what he'd said. He'd called her his "dear." They become a couple mere _hours_ ago, and he was already saying things like that? Was that even _allowed_? He half-expected Nadia to slap him.

But, she didn't. She just smiled, pecked his lips, and snuggled into his chest. Ford sighed in contentment and wrapped his arms protectively around her, wondering how someone so small could fit against him so perfectly.

* * *

A being's personal mindscape was comparable to a large building filled with long hallways and doors that led to longer ones. The actual MindScape was another realm entirely. Only creatures with mind-based abilities (and the rare being that could figure out how to get there without those abilities) could access it. After The Big Fire, it became a kind of safe haven for Tad Strange. A peaceful place, filled with grassy fields and calming beaches and the pathway to Heaven (not that he'd ever used that), where he could clear his head. The best thing about the MindScape was that, whether you had manifestation abilities or not, you could create anything you desired solely by willing it to come. Needless to say, it was _much_ different than a personal mindscape.

Which, if he was guessing correctly, made it just the place for Starclops to go if she was upset.

It didn't take long to find her. All he had to do was follow the sound of explosions and swear words. She was out in an otherwise empty field, manifesting little yellow triangles and blasting them with her eye beams, cussing as she hit them. Tad didn't know how long she'd been doing that, but she eventually sighed, manifested a large white beanbag, and plopped down on it. Deciding that now was a good time to talk, Tad made his own white beanbag across from her and sunk into it.

The demoness was surprised to see him. "What are you doing here?"

Tad ignored the question. "Something's bothering you."

Starclops let out a little nervous chuckle. "What? Nothing's bothering me. I was just doing a little target practice."

"With yellow triangles?"

Starclops sunk further into the beanbag, as though hoping it would swallow her whole (which she actually could have made it do). Her nervous laugh grew smaller. "Was-Was that what I was using? I had no idea."

Tad sighed. "Star, I'm worried about you. You've been acting weird since we left the labyrinth. Not you-weird, but, like, _weird_. You know what I mean." Starclops didn't respond, didn't look him in the eye. "Did you see something in there that upset you?" She sunk further into the beanbag. "Something to do with Bill?"

"Shut up."

Well, a reaction was a reaction, he supposed. "Did you see Bill? Or, was it an illusion relating to him?"

Starclops sighed, knowing that her childhood friend wouldn't leave her alone until she answered him. "Both."

When she didn't elaborate, Tad asked, "What happened?"

Starclops looked at him with such sadness that Tad thought she was a different demon. "I'll tell you what happened. Bill found me, and-and there was this other Bill, but he was an illusion. And, he - the illusion - he-he was crazy. I mean, we're talking Mad-Hatter-meets-Jeffrey-Dahmer crazy."

"I'm pretty sure you're exaggerating."

"Dude, I don't even know if I am. But, that's not why I'm upset."

"Then, why?" Starclops gripped the fabric of her beanbag. "Stella, talk to me."

Starclops's color darkened. "Don't call me that."

Tad blinked. "What? Stella, wha-"

"Don't call me Stella!" Starclops manifested away her bean bag and rose up above Tad, who shrunk back in surprise. "Stella is the name of a bitch who married a psycho that ruined _everything_! Stella is an idiot who still loves that _effed up asshole_ and wants to just _scream_ every time she sees that _monstrous son of a Dorito_!"

Tad wanted to say something...but nothing came out. He was too stunned by her outburst.

Starclops let out a breath that almost sounded like a sob. Tad conjured a larger beanbag, and they both laid down on it. Sensing that his friend needed some kind of support, so he took her hand in his. She didn't object.

The next thing she said had the tone, not of built of frustration, but of grief that had been kept under wraps for too long. "I saw him, you know."

Tad nodded sadly. "Yeah. You mentioned that."

"No. No, not like this. I-It was different."

"How?"

Starclops gripped his hand tighter. "He was himself."

"What do you mean?"

"He was _my_ Bill, Tad. I don't know how it happened or if it's permanent, but he wasn't a lunatic. He-He was the guy who made me laugh and wanted to make a difference and, yeah, he was a dork, but he-he was cute dork, and...and he was frigging _there_!" If she had tear ducts, Tad was sure she'd have been crying at this point. Her next sentence was barely audible. "I don't even know why I ditched him."

Tad didn't say anything. There was nothing he _could_ say. What could you possibly tell someone whose heart was in a thousand pieces that you didn't know how to put back together? All he could think to do was continue to hold her hand, as they lay there in silence.

* * *

 _CRASH_

 _SHATTER_

 _SMASH_

Bill flew around the building in a dizzying rage. Every bottle of the mother-frigging elixir was to be found and _eliminated_. Too long - too fucking _long_ \- he'd been under the spell of that shit.

 _SMASH_

He didn't know half of what he did under the influence, but, after what he'd seen in that labyrinth, which he didn't even remember _making_ …

He would _not_ turn into that!

 _CLATTER_

Withdrawal be damned! He'd get clean! He _had to get clean_!

 _SHATTER_

 _CRASH_

 _SMASH_

 _CLATTER_

* * *

There were several reasons why Echo was still awake. She was humiliated that Horace tried to force her to sleep in the pet-wing of the hospital. She wanted to know how her friends were doing. Somebody in another room had screamed. Really loud.

Echo wandered the halls. She would have called her friends' names, but she didn't want to wake anyone. She eventually stumbled upon Horace in the main lobby. He seemed strangely interested in something on the computer screen.

"Hey, Horace," Echo called, snapping him out of his trance. He looked around for the source of the voice. " _Horace_."

"God?" Horace wondered in awe.

Echo rolled her eyes and climbed up the counter. "No, dumbass. It's me."

The doctor seemed more confused than embarrassed. "Echo? What are you doing up?"

"I could ask you the same thing."

Horace's tone turned serious. "Well, everything was fine at first. I was having the most wonderful dream about building the world's largest bridge. _I love bridges_!" Echo face-palmed. "Then, suddenly, the bridge collapsed, and I woke up, screaming at the top of my lungs." Well, that explained...something. "Anyway, I couldn't go back to sleep, so I decided to review some medical records. And, in doing so, I stumbled upon some very important information about Ford."

 _Now_ , he had Echo's attention. "What kind of information?"

"I've discovered that he's no ordinary normo. He's a-" Horace's pager beeped. He checked it and walked away, saying, "Well, one of the patients is going into labor, so I'm afraid I have to leave."

Echo gaped at his retreating form. " _What_? You're not even gonna _tell me_!?" Seeing that he wasn't coming back - and since Horace had shut down the computer while they were talking - Echo groaned in frustration and stormed back to her room, her mission to find her friends forgotten.

 **HZEV BLFIHVOU. WLM'G OLLP YZXP. GVZIRMT FH ZKZIG FMGRO RG'H ZOO TLMV.**

* * *

 **Hint: This particular code is lyrics to the Evanescence song, _Never Go Back_.**

 **Also, I've taken down my forum. Instead, I thought of something easier. If you have a question about this fic, PM me, and I'll have Bill Cipher answer! It'll be fun!**

 **Review!**


	24. Carla McCorkle

**Intermission! But, pay attention to the dialogue and the code at the end!**

* * *

 **Chapter Twenty-Three: Carla McCorkle**

 _Glass Shard Beach, New Jersey, 1972_

Stanley Pines didn't know how his brother and girlfriend had ended up in an alley, the former speckled with blood that may or may not have been his own. He didn't know what had the two of them so badly shaken. He just knew that, when she'd called him, Carla had been sobbing so hard that Ford had to finish the phone call. Now, Stan was driving at night, Ford in the backseat and Carla riding shotgun.

According to what Ford had said over the phone, he had been walking home from his robotics team meeting - a total nerd stereotype, in Stan's opinion - and stumbled upon Carla getting harassed by a big guy neither of them knew. The guy had essentially ran off when he saw Ford, and Carla was too frightened to walk home, even with Ford with her.

Stan could believe a pretty girl like Carla getting attacked (especially in _this_ part of Jersey), and he was relieved that she was okay. That said, none of that story explained the blood staining Ford's clothes and hands.

So, he pulled into the nearest parking lot.

"Why'd you stop?" Ford asked.

Stan turned in his seat so that he could at least attempt to face both of them. "Okay, you say that my girl almost got assaulted, but no one said anything about anyone getting beat up." Ford glanced anxiously at the stains on his white T-shirt. "Now, before we go anywhere else tonight, I wanna know the whole story. And, keep in mind, this involves both my twin _and_ my girlfriend, so don't hold nothing back. Now, someone start talking."

Neither passenger said anything for a moment, then Carla timidly spoke. "Well, Ford didn't tell you the _whole_ truth." Stan couldn't help noticing how pale his brother suddenly got. "The guy _did_ run off, but…" Carla bit her lip and looked over at Ford, as though asking for confirmation. Stan raised an eyebrow. Ford and Carla were friends, but usually the latter would turn to her boyfriend for reassurance. Ford swallowed and nodded, seeming pretty damn interested in the cheap interior. Carla smiled proudly. "Actually, Ford fought him off. If it wasn't for him, I probably would've lost my virginity or worse."

What? Stan blinked in surprise. Suddenly, the blood made sense. Pride replacing the fear in his chest, Stan grinned at the teen in the back. "Whoa, Stanford! Didn't know ya had it in ya!" Ford didn't respond. Stan let out an awkward laugh. "All them boxing lessons sure paid off, eh Sixer?" Still nothing. "Ford? Buddy? You okay?"

Stan snapped his fingers, and Ford woke from his daze. "Hm? Oh, uh, yeah, sure."

Carla cleared her throat. "Well, um, why don't you just take me home, Lee-Lee?"

Ford snorted at the nickname, and Stan rolled his eyes. Yeah, that _would_ get a reaction. Unfortunately, "Lee-Lee" wasn't in the mood. "There's something you guys aren't telling me. Now, what is it?" They both looked away from him. "Well? Spill! What in Sam Hill are you two keeping from me?"

Carla tugged on her brown curls - a nervous habit - and looked in the back. "Ford? You said you wanted to tell him."

Stan looked pointedly at him, and he sank back in his seat and muttered, "Teenagers say a lot of stupid things." Stan glared, pretending that he wasn't about to explode out of worry and irritation. Ford drew in a calming breath. "Well, I did fight him off, but…"

He trailed off, and the blood suddenly made even _more_ sense. Stan hated where this was going. "But, what? Did the guy have a weapon on him? That blood isn't _yours_ , is it?"

Ford shook his head. "No, I-I don't think so. Maybe a little, but it's mostly the other guy's. He _did_ have a weapon, though. It, er… It was a knife."

"A big one," Carla added. "Like the kind you use to cut meat."

"Yeah, and, I…"

Ford trailed off again. Stan put the pieces together, and he wasn't sure how to feel about the result. "Ford, did you, like, use his knife?"

"He-He survived!" Ford exclaimed hastily. He returned his attention to the interior. "But… Yeah, I used it. A-And, that's what made him leave."

Stan let that sink in. It was strange to think of his nerdy twin even punching someone. Let alone pulling a knife on a guy. Of course, if Stan was in his brother's situation (assuming the attacker was too much for him to handle), he probably would have done the same thing. Stan offered a comforting smile. "Don't worry about it. You saved Carla from some psycho pervert. You should be proud of yourself."

"But, I don't even know how it happened!" Ford countered. He anxiously raked a hand through his hair. "I just saw them and he was hurting her and I got so pissed off and I just _lost_ it! I-I just, like, blacked out, or something!"

"Hey, hey, cool it, Poindexter. It doesn't matter how it happened. All that matters is that you're okay, Carla's okay, and nobody lost their limbs or- Carla, you're not a virgin. Just last week, we-"

Carla's face darkened. " _Stanley_!"

Ford laughed out loud.

Then, Stan blushed. "Right. Secret. My bad."

Stan drove Carla home, but Ford remained quiet for the rest of the night and the morning after; luckily, their parents weren't home to see Ford's condition. As badly as Stan wanted to know more, he had a feeling that his brother wouldn't say anything else on the situation.

 **GSVIV ZIV GDL GBKVH LU KVLKOV: GSLHV DSL ZIV HZEVW ZMW GSLHV DSL MVVW HZEVW.**

* * *

 **GREETINGS, WORTHLESS SKIN SACKS! I AM BILL CIPHER, AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT THERE WILL BE GREAT DARKNESS IN THE FUTURES OF SIX FINGERS AND HIS GANG OF WEIRDOS! PM JET ENGINE SOME QUESTIONS, AND I WILL POSSESS HER AND ANSWER THEM!**

 **Bill, get off my computer!**

 **KISS MY ANGULAR ASS, BABY!**

 **Ugh. Review.**


	25. Friend or Foe

**Coming up next: Fordia. Lots of it. Enjoy.**

 **And, just a little note: Ford's been in the portal for a few years at this point.**

* * *

 **Chapter Twenty-Four: Friend or Foe**

It wasn't the first time Stanford Pines had an episode, and sadly, it probably wouldn't be the last. He sighed and stared up at the starry sky, speckles of every color of the rainbow decorating the otherwise pitch-black night. He absentmindedly rubbed the bark of the tree he was standing next to - smoother, but with more holes than the trees of his own dimension - and sighed. He hadn't been able to sleep that night, so he'd decided to investigate the creatures in the area. A hot pink creature that looked like a cross between a chicken and an ostrich was the first thing he found. Unfortunately, it had flown away before he could find out anything about it. Well, other than the fact that it flew using its many tongues.

Ford sighed, the afternoon's events strangling his conscience.

" _Go on! Throw it! It won't hurt me at all!" Starclops boasted._

 _Ford turned the stone over in his hands, considering. He didn't want to hurt her, but he wanted to know whether or not she was exaggerating._

 _Nadia voiced his concerns with a disapproving shake of her head. "This is a bad idea."_

" _Actually, Star's right," Tad commented. "There aren't a lot of things that can injure a dream demon."_

 _Starclops punched him playfully. "Yeah! What Detective Douche said!"_

" _Detective Douche?" Ford muttered in confusion._

 _Echo, who had been sitting on Nadia's head, rolled her eyes. "Well, Starclops talks so much that I've been wanting throw something at her, so…" She threw the a small rock, and-_

" _Ah! My eye!" Starclops's eye snapped shut, and she rubbed it frantically. "That's on me for not covering it."_

 _Echo raised her arms happily. "No regrets!"_

 _Tad pinched between his eyes and groaned. "No offense, Echo, but I liked you better before you talked." The sound of a branch cracking came from nearby. "What was that?"_

 _Ford instinctively whipped out his gun and pointed in the direction of the sound._

"What are you doing up?"

The familiar voice broke him from his thoughts. Nadia walked up beside him. She took his hand in hers and gave it a gentle squeeze. He didn't know why she was awake; he was just grateful for her touch, no matter how small the gesture.

Ford shrugged. "Insomnia. You?"

"Same, I guess," the mutant replied. She rubbed the back of her head. "I think my head's still a little messed up from Bill."

Ford sighed, wishing that his lover didn't have to deal with the after-effects of the Nightmare Labyrinth. "Yeah. That's probable." He wanted to tell her that it would wear off, but he wasn't entirely sure how that particular spelled worked. Hell, he _still_ had insomnia, and Bill hadn't messed with his mind in… How long had it been?

Come to think of it, how long had he been away from Earth? Ford had never really taken the time to think about it, but he'd been gone for a pretty long time, hadn't he? Different dimensions have different time zones. He could have been gone for a few hours, weeks, months... _years_ , even. How much time had passed on Earth? How old was he? Were his parents still around? What about Shermie and Stanley? Was Fiddleford's memory getting better or worse?

" _Stanford_." Nadia's tone was that of someone who had been saying the same thing for a while.

Ford frowned apologetically. "I-I'm sorry. What were you saying?"

Nadia let go of his hand and stepped in front of him. "Still thinking about that guy?"

Ford bit his lip and looked away.

 _The...thing looked like a blue tiger with mint-green eyes and a purple cobra (which appeared to be_ alive _) for a tail. It's dark denim jacket and leather pants made it look like a 50s gang stereotype. It jumped out of the bushes and landed on its hindlegs. It whipped out a strange-looking knife-like weapon. The blade was curved and pale blue in color with intricate designs carved into it._

" _Trnnv blfi ylmvh!" It shouted, brandishing the knife crazily. "R dzmg blfi ylmvh!"_

 _They all jumped back in surprise, especially Tad and Starclops, the former exclaiming, "Crap! He's got a Demon's Dagger!"_

" _A what?" Ford asked, not entirely certain that he wanted to know._

 _Starclops answered, "In a nutshell, it's one of the few things that can kill a dream demon!"_

 _Ford didn't remember what happened after the creature had nicked Tad's corner. All he knew was that, when he came to, the creature was a bloody heap on the ground. And, Ford had been holding its dagger._

Ford involuntarily shuddered at the memory. What was wrong with him? He'd been having memory lapses since childhood, but he'd never actually _killed_ anyone before. Not to mention that his blackouts seemed to be getting more frequent.

Nadia's kind voice broke through his anxious thought process. "Ford, I know you didn't mean to kill him. You were trying to help, and you _did_. Yeah, it kinda got out of hand, but you still saved us." Suddenly, her smile seemed forced. "At least, that accident was helpful."

Ford's heart went out to her. He knew that she was thinking about her parents. "Nadia, I know what you're thinking, and that wasn't your fault. Well-Well, okay, it was, but it wasn't. I mean-"

"Stanford?" She still wasn't looking at him.

When she didn't say anything else, he replied, "Yes, Nadia?"

"Do you, um...think that I…" She balled her fists at her sides and spoke through a constricted throat. "Am I a monster, Ford?"

Monster. That word split Ford's heart in half. Did she honestly believe…? Then again, maybe everyone else believed it. Ford recalled hearing a few things that had either aggravated him, confused him, or both:

" _We're usually the misfits with no friends besides each other…"_

" _Mutant is good as animal. Mutant no good to people. Mutant do terrible things."_

" _What was the first dimension that the mutants ravaged during the Mutant War?"_

Perhaps it wasn't _her_ that was disliked. Maybe people hated mutants in general for some reason. But, that didn't make Nadia right. Ford cupped her cheek, subconsciously caressing her scar with his thumb, and tilted her head so that she was looking at him. "Nadia Blackburne, I've met a _lot_ of monsters in my day. So, let me assure you; you are _not_ one of them. You are an amazing woman, and it completely baffles me that you would ever think otherwise." Nadia just stared blankly at him. She got that look sometimes, and he still wasn't quite sure what it meant. "Uh, don't take this the wrong way, Nadia, but why do you always...stare at me when I compliment you?"

Nadia shrugged shyly. "Guess I'm still getting used to you caring the way you do."

The tug in Ford's chest strengthened, and he kissed her. Gently at first, then more fiercely, needing to remind her that she was loved. Nadia gladly returned his passion, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling herself closer. Ford wrapped one arm around her waist and tangled his other hand in her hair. The smell and taste of her was awakening a primal instinct between his legs, but he forced it back, unsure if she was ready.

Then, she shifted to remove his trench coat, and he knew that she wanted him as much as he wanted her.

* * *

The stranger appeared out of nowhere. Although Starclops and Tad were already awake, Echo wasn't. Starclops had to send a tiny lightning bolt down the hole the snark had dug, which of course left her irritated and slightly charred. Honestly, Starclops didn't know what she was so mad about. It's not like it she was trying to kill the little creature; the demoness wasn't heartless. Fortunately, Echo seemed to forget about the - literal - mild shock, when she spotted the new person.

He looked human-enough, aside from his bright red eyes and pastel yellow skin. Holding a cane and dressed in a navy blue suit with matching dress pants and top hat and black dress shoes, he did not look like someone taking a moonlit trek through the woods.

He leaned on his cane and tipped his hat in greeting. He spoke with a slight lisp. "Salutations, folks. My name is Jemmery."

The others exchanged looks, and Tad coughed and said, "Um... Hey?"

Jemmery didn't seem to notice their confusion. "I was taking a stroll earlier, and I saw your six-fingered friend kill that cat-creature."

Echo crossed her small arms and glared up at him. "So what? He was protecting us. You got a problem with that?"

Jemmery chuckled and pointed at the small creature. "I like you. You've got moxie." Echo indignantly stuck out her tongue. "Now, as I was saying, I saw what happened. A Protector, eh? I haven't seen one of those in a long, _long_ time."

"Protector?" Echo asked.

Starclops scratched her top point and said thoughtfully, "I had my suspicions."

"Me too," Tad agreed. "But, one incident doesn't make him a Protector."

"Didn't you see his eyes, though? They were, like, glowing."

Echo jumped up and down and waved her arms, trying to get their attention and wishing she were taller. " _Hello_? Confused snark, over here!"

Jemmery gazed at them in curiosity. "You didn't know your friend was a Protector?"

"How do _you_ know if he is?" Starclops scoffed.

"Simple. My grandmother was one. Plus, I saw his little transformation. You know, the glowing eyes, the sudden sprouting of fangs."

"So, you know about this 'Protector' thing?" Echo asked, still not really sure what any of them were talking about.

Jemmery nodded. "Absolutely. And, I'll gladly explain." He looked around. "Now, where is that fellow, anyway?"

The demons shrugged, but Echo proudly puffed out her chest. " _I'll_ find him. And, Nadia, too. We snarks have an awesome sense of smell." With that, she scurried off to find them.

Jemmery tossed his cane in the air and caught it (apparently, he didn't _actually_ need it). "Welp, if your friend decides that he wants some information," he pointed to a cabin in the distance, "My house is right over there. A bit of a trek, but I think it'll be worth the effort for the information I can provide."

Starclops waved off the offer. "Thanks, but we know plenty of things."

"Uh, Starclops," Tad said, "we don't exactly know that much about Protectors. They _are_ pretty rare, after all."

Unfortunately, he had a point. "Oo-kay, Jemmery. We'll meet you at your place, I guess."

Jemmery grinned. "Fantastic! I know a lot about a lot of things. From Protectors, to alchemy, to wieners-"

"Wait," Starclops interrupted, suddenly interested. "You know about alchemy?"

"Indubitably."

Tad looked curiously at her. "Why the sudden interest, Star?"

Starclops wasn't listening. This guy knew about alchemy. Maybe… Just maybe…

Echo scurried back to their side, embarrassment clouding her face. "Uh, Ford and Nadia… They're-They're kinda busy. They'll probably be occupied for the rest of the night.

Jemmery clicked his tongue. "That's a shame. Well then, why don't you guys come by in the morning? We'll talk then."

They all agreed, and Jemmery left. When he was gone, Tad asked, "So, what exactly are those two doing?"

Echo awkwardly shook out her pelt. "Uh… That's...not...something I should, you know, discuss…"

Starclops gasped dramatically, and her burnt-orange color lightened to a tangerine-color in excitement. "They're doing the deed! Holy shit, they're doing the deed!"

Tad groaned. "Honestly, you are the single most immature being I've ever met."

"Doing the deed! Doing the deed!"

"Seriously, you're making this weirder than it needs to be."

Echo sighed, wishing she'd never said anything. Actually, she was just glad she left before they could really get anything going. "Just don't mention it to them, when they come back, okay?"

Starclops was too busy chanting to pay any attention. "Doing the deed! Doing the deed!"

 **ZMW MLD, GSV DVZGSVI IVKLIG: KZIGOB XOLFWB, GDVMGB KVIXVMG XSZMXV LU DRVMVIH.**

* * *

 **Oh, Starclops...**

 **Hey, anyone who can tell me where the term "Detective Douche" came from gets a virtual cookie!**

 **REVIEW EVERYONE!**

 **Aaaaaaaaannnnddd, Bill's back.**

 **ASK ME ANYTHING! I KNOW LOTS OF THINGS! _LOTS OF THINGS..._**


	26. Protector

**Okay, just a warning. Those of you who watch _South Park_ , specifically, the Black Friday special, may find Jemmery to be rather familiar. Those of you who have not seen it...I apologize ahead of time. Also, the concept of a Protector is from C.C. Hunter's _Shadow Falls_ series.**

* * *

 **Chapter Twenty-Five: Protector**

Naturally, Ford was unsure about this "Jemmery" character, but the others seemed to think it would be a good idea to meet with him. In other words, Ford was out-voted. So, now they were in the strange man's house, the mortals sitting on the couch cushions (with Ford ready with a pen and his journal) and the demons sitting on the armrests. Jemmery was standing before them, pacing as he spoke.

"Now, I'm sure you're wondering what it is that I know," he said.

"Uh, that's kinda why we're here," Echo reminded with an eyeroll.

Jemmery laughed. "I still like you! Anyway, it all began many, many, _many_ years ago. A baby was born. Nobody knew it yet, but this baby would grow up to be a man with, not only a burning desire to make a difference in the multiverse, but also with an incredible wiener."

"Wait, what?" Ford asked in surprise.

Starclops giggled. "I bet _Ford and Nadia_ know a thing or two about wieners. _Hey-oh_!"

Nadia raised an eyebrow at Ford. "What's she talking about?"

Ford shrugged, but inwardly he was a little nervous. Starclops had been teasing the couple all day. Could she have known about last night? She could read minds, so it was possible. And, if she did know… Oh God, they'd never hear the end of it.

Jemmery stopped pacing continued speaking as though the others had never said anything. His gestures and sudden speech pattern made him seem like a theater stereotype. "Though it was small, it could make bedtime a _masterpiece_ of passion-"

" _Okay_ ," Tad - thankfully - interrupted. "That's nice for his girlfriend, but could you, maybe, discuss the Protector _himself_ , and not just his genitals?"

"Don't worry," Jemmery assured. "I'm getting to that. Now, during his first time in bed, the man unzipped his pants, stuck out his wiener, and jiggled it around, like this." He moved two fingers down in front of his crotch and wiggled them.

Ford facepalmed. "This is ridiculous! Will you just _explain_ what a Protector is and why you think I am one?"

Jemmery sighed. "Fine. I'll skip the wieners. But, I assure you, I _will_ come back to them later." Everyone but Starclops groaned. "Now, the Protector. Very little is known about Protectors, as they are very, very rare. I cannot tell you a lot, but I can tell you what I know. A Protector is a being with very special abilities and very special wieners. Or, flowers. Depends on the gender."

Echo gawked at him and voiced what her friends were thinking: "What is wrong with you!?"

"It all began with the man I mentioned earlier. His name was Halex Irsch, and he was the first Protector. On the outside he was just an average Joe. But, one day he discovered that he had an incredible ability. If someone he cared for was in danger, he gained incredible strength, speed, and coordination."

"Is that why you think Ford's a Protector?" Nadia asked. "Because, of what happened when that cat-creature attacked us?"

Jemmery nodded. "Yes. And, his eyes glowed, and his teeth got sharper. Two telltale signs of Protector-Mode. I don't think that's the official name; that's just what I'm calling it."

Ford gnawed thoughtfully on his pencap, silently going over everything he had heard so far (aside from the "wieners," of course). He found it rather difficult to believe that he was a Protector. Surely, he would have known if he was something more than human, right? On the other hand, he'd had blackouts since childhood, and he never seemed to recall exactly what happened as a result. Now that he thought about it, his episodes only ever occurred when someone he cared for was in danger. Like, when he was in grade school, and Crampelter was beating up Stanley. Or, in high school, when Carla McCorkle - his friend and Stan's girlfriend - was in danger of sexual assault. And, all these instances of danger in the different dimensions.

Very interesting. But, he needed more information.

"And, now," Jemmery continued dramatically, "a few words about... _my wiener_!"

Ford closed his journal and got up to leave. "Yeah, we're done here."

Tad flew after him. "I got, uh, things to do."

Then, Nadia. "Important things, so, yeah."

And, Echo. "You're crazy, so we're leaving."

Only Starclops remained. Once her friends had left in disgust, she floated up to Jemmery. "Uh, Jemmery?"

Jemmery grinned. "Ah, so _you_ wish to hear about my wiener!"

"No, I- Well, yes, I do wanna hear about it. In _excruciating_ detail, mind you. But, first I'd like to know what you know about alchemy."

"What?" Jemmery tilted his head in confusion. "I don't know anything about alchemy."

"But...you said that you did."

"Did I? My mistake. I meant to say that I know _someone_ who knows about alchemy. My friend in Dimension 853. Now, _there's_ a guy who knows things."

Hope sparked in Starclops. "Do you think you can get us there?"

Said hope immediately died, when Jemmery cheerfully replied, "No, I cannot!"

"Oh. Then, you're useless to me."

"But, you still wanna hear about my wiener?"

"...Quit reading my mind."

* * *

Ford had his doubts about being a Protector. But, then Echo mentioned that Horace said something about Ford being different. So, when Starclops had finished doing...whatever she was doing, the gang headed for Mighty Med and confronted Horace.

"Oh, yeah," Horace said as he filed some papers in his office, "you're a Protector. Frankly, I'm shocked you didn't know that already."

Ford just stood there. He wasn't sure what he was more shocked at: him being a Protector or how casual Horace was being about it.

"And, you never thought to mention that?" Tad asked.

Horace shrugged. "No one ever asked."

"Question," Starclops said, raising her hand. "Can I punch him?"

Echo, sitting on Nadia's head, raised her hand. "Follow-up question: can I also punch him?"

Ford ignored both of them. "Horace, you seem to know what you're talking about. Do you think you could answer something for me?" The doctor nodded. "Well, whenever I, uh, do my, er, Protector-thing - I guess - I sort of, you know, blackout, for lack of a better term. Any way I might be able to better control myself?"

Horace frowned in thought. "Good question. I'm afraid you'll have to figure that out on your own. But, listen. As a Protector, you're going to have a lot on your plate. Once people find out what you are, you'll immediately be seen as a savior to many. But, that also means that many will see you as a threat."

 **Z KILGVXGLI'H DRVMVI EZIRVH RM HRAV. R'W GVOO BLF ZYLFG ULIW'H YFG GSRH RHM'G ZM N-IZGVW URX.**

* * *

 **I know. There was a lot of sexual humor. It's just...I watched the Black Friday special and couldn't stop laughing, so... Just review!**


	27. Alchemy

**This will give you a little insight into that elixir Bill likes so much. Or...used to like, depending on how you look at it.**

* * *

 **Chapter Twenty-Six: Alchemy**

 _The Second Dimension, Several Trillion Years Ago_

Stella was worried. Her husband, Bill, had been acting strange lately. And, considering that he was an eccentric demon/alchemist married to a screw-ball like her, that was pretty bad. Frankly, Stella Cipher wished she would have noticed it sooner. In her defense, the changes started out rather subtle.

A random joke about death? Probably just Bill's weird sense of humor.

A couple of extra explosions? Whoops! He must have mixed the wrong chemicals again.

A sudden taste for that purple drink? Well, he does like to try new things.

It was the drink that quickly became the most worrisome. After that first day with it, Bill was never seen without it. That was when he started changing.

Before: kind, sensible, quirky. After: possessive, secretive, quirky to the point of discomfort.

Obviously, the change didn't happen overnight, but maybe it wouldn't have hurt so much if it had. To think, the whole thing had started out so innocent…

* * *

Stella knocked on the door to her husband's lab. "Bill? You in there?"

A crash startled her. Yep. He was definitely in there. "Uh, g-gimme a sec," Bill called.

After _way_ too long, Stella just opened the door on her own. Then, she wished she hadn't. Anxiety seared its mark on her heart, as she looked around the room. Or, what was left of it. Broken glass and miscellaneous fluids littered the floor. Smoke floated up from various parts of the room. A table had somehow been embedded in the ceiling, and… That shimmery silver stuff smeared on the wall...probably wasn't blood.

Willing herself not to hurl, Stella called, "B-Bill?" Then, she spotted him standing in the corner, silver blood dripping from his hand as he gingerly picked shards of glass from it. "What happened?" she asked, rushing to his side and helping him remove the glass.

Bill sighed. "It's, uh, hard to explain."

"I'll find some bandages."

"No need," Bill assured before Stella could leave. "I have something that will work even better." He flicked his wrist, and a wine glass filled with a purple liquid materialized in his uninjured hand. He took a sip from it, and his other hand was instantly healed. Stella stared in awe, and Bill chuckled at his wife's reaction. "Made it myself. It's a special elixir I whipped up that's _supposed_ to cure all physical injuries."

Stella glanced curiously at him. "'Supposed?'"

"Well, it does that…" He awkwardly scratched the back of his top-point. "But, apparently not without side effects." Gesturing at the destruction in his lab, he commented, "I have literally no memory of what happened here."

That should have been a red flag, but Stella had carelessly passed it off as her husband's typical - often destructive - brand of trial-and-error. Maybe if she had realized something was wrong, then she could have saved Bill before it was too late.

Something else she didn't know? That one glass was all it took for it to already be too late.

 **GSV FOGRNZGV ZWWRXGRLM. WIFTTRVH YVDZIV.**

* * *

 **So, now that I'm graduating high school - and my cosmetology license _finally_ came in the mail - I'm going to be looking for a job, which could mean less time to write. But, I _will_ be continuing this. Don't you worry about that.**

 **YOU COULDN'T GET A JOB IF ONE SAT ON YOU!**

 **Ignore Bill. Just review.**


	28. Why the Caged Snark Screams

**Um, so...I was gonna wait to put this out, but...I didn't. I'm so glad you guys (hopefully) don't know where I live, because you will want to hunt me down and kill me after this chapter.**

 **On a side note, basically the entire chapter is a big ol' pile of foreshadowing.**

 **On another side note, Ford's been away from Earth for...maybe seven years? Something like that.**

* * *

 **Chapter Twenty-Seven: Why the Caged Snark Screams**

Echo could handle being some weirdo's pet. Unfortunately, that particular weirdo had been completely nuts. Moreover, she had been neglectful and only allowed Echo any food if she "performed well." Meaning that, if she didn't do every frigging thing the woman demanded of her, she wasn't getting fed. And, considering that a lot of those things involved spying on innocent civilians and erasing people's memories of the woman's nefarious crimes, Echo went to bed hungry a lot.

She had thought she'd found a safe haven among her new friends.

* * *

Dimension 0210 was a land of mountain ranges and people made entirely of rocks. Naturally, it was difficult to find a comfortable place to sleep. A lonely old rock-man named Igneous had allowed them to spend the night in his cave. Not a great place for flesh-creatures to rest, but it wasn't like they had any better options. Besides, Igneous had only almost-crushed them once, and that was simply a well-intentioned hug. Apparently, actual flesh was foreign to him.

Since snarks slept underground - and the floor of the cave was too hard to dig through - Echo had wandered outside to look for some softer ground. Despite scuffling here and there, everything was - no pun intended - rock-solid.

"Well, would you look at that?"

That voice. Damn, damn, _damn_ that voice! Praying that she missed her guess, Echo glanced from her digging and found a pair of muddy black combat boots. She looked up further at the gray leggings, the - probably fake - hips, the - also probably fake - breasts, and of course the - totally real - scowl on her old owner's otherwise pretty face.

Echo stood up on her hind legs, not giving the human the satisfaction of seeing how anxious she was. "Hello, Mallory. I haven't you in a while."

Mallory crossed her arms and glared down at her, suddenly seeming much larger (and, being probably Ford's species, she was a lot bigger than Echo already). "Likewise, Echo. I see that bow's still doing its job."

Wait, what? She was making it _really_ hard not to look frazzled. "How-How do you know about the translator? And, my new name?"

Mallory chuckled. "I've been around. I've seen things, done things."

"Were you stalking us?" The thought sent shivers down Echo's spine. How long had this been going on? Did she even want to know?

"You call it stalking; I call it...lovingly lurking in the shadows." The snark was pretty sure that there was no actual "love" involved. "Frankly, I'm surprised you're still alive. When you escaped, I'd expected you to be dead. But, you're obviously fine. Kind of annoying, actually."

That was all Echo needed to hear to be completely horrified. Mallory _wanted_ her dead, but why? Deciding that the reason wasn't important, she sucked in air, preparing to erase Mallory's memory of seeing her. Or, better yet, of ever even meeting her. That one sounded more appealing. Echo screamed. White beams shined out of her eyes and onto Mallory. Echo slowly stopped as a horrible thought struck her.

Nothing was happening. Why wasn't Mallory being affected by the scream?

"Are you finished?" Mallory asked. Seriously, had the scream done _anything_?

Unable to hide her fear any longer, Echo crouched down on all fours, ready to bolt if the situation turned anymore sour. "Why aren't you affected?"

Mallory smirked and flipped her dark brown curls over her shoulder. "Long story short, I know a guy who taught me lots of things." She reached into her dark blue sweatshirt and pulled out the pendant that was hanging around her neck. "Including how amber wards off snark screams."

That wasn't the only thing it, Echo remembered fearfully. She tried to run, but Mallory had pinned her to the ground by slamming her boot onto her tail. Echo cried out, as she heard the distinct crunch of bone. She tried to work past the dizzying pain and scramble free, but all she'd managed to do was exhaust herself and aggravate her injury.

Mallory crouched down and removed the pendant from her neck. The menace in her blue eyes was more prominent than ever. "You know something? When you ran off, I wasn't too worried. But, then I found out that you were traveling with Ford." She knew Ford? Echo hadn't known that, but she was too numb to ask. Just being this close to amber was physically draining. "I don't want you telling him or the rest of your friends about me. I want to be a surprise."

Echo could barely hear her at this point.

"You know me. I do things when I'm good and ready."

The sear of amber against her back broke through her numbness, and she opened her mouth in a silent scream.

* * *

They had all been worried when Echo didn't show up and had spread out to find her. Ford had been the first to find her. Her friends didn't know what to think. Igneous had said that he didn't know of any creatures that could burn a hole through a body; of course, all the inhabitants of the dimension had been made of stone. None of them could comprehend it; they had absolutely no insight as to what happened.

...Actually, Ford had a theory. He didn't want to share it with his friends, but they needed to know. He had seen a burn like this once back on Earth. He had been studying snarks, and one had somehow gotten hold of an amber bracelet (some careless woman must have dropped it). The snark's paw had burned off. But, this burn didn't look like an accident. It was too thorough, as though amber had been pushed through her heart.

It was the only probable explanation they had, but no one knew who would want to murder Echo.

 **VEVI IVZW GSRH URX ZMW DLMWVI, "DSB WRWM'G ULIW'H UIRVMWH XLNV GSILFTS GSV KLIGZO DRGS SRN?"**

* * *

 **So, in case it wasn't obvious, Mallory will be coming back. I've got big plans for her.**


	29. Investigation

**This chapter's short, but there's some information for you to analyze. So, get those brains working, people! Also, it dawned on me that the code in the last chapter was a little harsh.**

 **Or, was it?**

 **Nah, I'm kidding. It totally was.**

 **Or, was it?**

 **I'll stop doing that. You guys can read now.**

* * *

 **Chapter Twenty-Eight: Investigation**

 _I have done a thorough examination of Echo's body - or, at least, as thorough as I can with absolutely no useful tools - and here's what I've found:_

 _Nothing. Diddly-squat. And, other phrases of that nature._

 _Whoever killed her either knew what they were doing or used magic. Possibly both. All I know for certain is that amber, a snark's most deadly weakness, was used and that it wasn't an accident. Echo never mentioned having any enemies, but I have a gut-feeling that this wasn't just some random attack._

"Still analyzing, I see."

Ford started at the voice, almost dropping his seventh journal. (Starclops claimed to have transported the completed journals to a "safe location," and Ford wasn't sure he wanted to know what that meant. Years from now, Ford would find them all in his private study. He would also discover that dream demons could safely transport inanimate objects between dimensions...just not living things.) Tad gazed at the sight before him. Ford had on six-fingered gloves - some dimensions were rather frigid in temperature - because he had been examining Echo's small body for...well, he wasn't quite sure. There was no blood, but the snark's scuffed fur and crushed tail told him that there had been a struggle.

Sighing in hopelessness and heartache, Ford sat his pen and journal beside him and rubbed his temples. "Tad, if you could conjure up, like, five pots of coffee right now, that'd be great." Liquor would have been preferable, but he was trying to avoid a relapse.

Tad floated closer to Echo's body. "How about instead I do a scan of her? That'll tell me if there's anything unusual that we haven't noticed yet."

"You can do that?" Ford asked in shock. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"I did, but you were kinda focused on being a homicide detective. I'm honestly not sure if you were listening to _anything_ at the time."

Ford gave an embarrassed shrug. "Heh. What can I say?"

Tad rolled his eyes. "I'll do it anyway."

"Thanks. That would be a big help."

"Gimme a sec." Ford watched in amazement as Tad's eyes merged into one, and a spotlight-looking ray shone from it and on to Echo. When the light vanished, and Tad's eyes separated, the square demon scratched one of his top-points in confusion. "That's odd."

"Did you find anything unusual?" Ford asked, picking up his journal and pen and opening the former to the page he had been working on.

Tad crossed his arms, looking like he didn't quite know the answer. After a moment, he responded, "It's definitely unusual, but I'm not sure what to make of it. She's kinda…" Tad groped for a description. "I don't know what to call it. It's like…"

"Like…?" Ford clicked his pen impatiently.

"Like...she's empty. For lack of a better word."

"Empty?" Ford thoughtfully gnawed on his pen.

Tad shrugged. "Well...you see, I've scanned corpses before - let's just say, this isn't my first murder mystery - and they were different. Uh, think of a scan as- Hm…" Ford heard a small crack and stopped chewing, lest he break open _another_ pen. "Look, I'm gonna explain the best I can, but I apologize ahead of time if I don't make any sense. Okay. Now, everything in the multiverse is made of energy. In some beings, like dream demons, it's just more prevalent than in others. But, beings with souls, they have more energy than something like that pen you, uh, _won't stop clicking_."

Ford hadn't even realized he'd been doing it. "Sorry. Nervous habit."

Tad shrugged. "Hey, we've all got 'em. Now, here's the weird part. Echo's body radiated _physical_ energy, but I didn't detect anything else. Am-Am I making any sense right now?"

God, did Ford ever wish he wasn't. "So, you're saying that something happened to her _soul_?"

"Maybe. But, maybe snarks just don't have souls. I don't know. This is the first time I've scanned a snark."

Ford subconsciously chewed his pen some more. Yes, it was possible that snarks, as a species, were void of souls, but Ford didn't think someone as spirited as Echo would be lacking. Something wasn't right. Something _really_ wasn't right. He'd studied a multitude of soul-draining creatures (which, for obvious reasons, had been rather challenging). Did one of those take Echo's soul? But, why the amber? Why would they kill Echo to do it? Unless she had been killed by one thing and drained by another? Or, maybe there was no amber involved, and the burn was just a by-product of her being drained?

His thoughts were unceremoniously interrupted when the pen snapped in half, and Ford choked on a mouthful of ink. At least Tad had the decency to _try_ not to laugh.

 **ZUGVI WVZGS, GSV HLFO NLEVH LM GL SVZEVM. YFG, DSZG RU GSV HLFO RH HGLOVM?**

* * *

 **And, that's my chapter. There's more fascinating news coming up in the next one. I should have it done before I go on vacation, but if not...**

 **REALITY'S AN ILLUSION; THE UNIVERSE IS A HOLOGRAM; REVIEW; BYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEE!**

 **What he said.**


	30. Girl Talk

**Attention Boys: Do not be alarmed by the name of this chapter. There is no uncomfortable feminine discussions, and this is perfectly safe for the male gender.**

 **Attention Fellow Pokemon Fans: You're probably gonna love this.**

* * *

 **Chapter Twenty-Nine: Girl Talk**

Maybe it was because she didn't have any of her own, but Starclops had always liked playing with Nadia's hair. It was relaxing and a good excuse to get the mutant to spill whatever was on her mind. And, thanks to...recent developments...Nadia was going to need some girl time.

So, as Nadia sat cross-legged on the floor of the cave, Starclops asked while braiding cornrows into her friend's hair, "So, feeling any better?" Earlier, Nadia had been sobbing into Ford's chest, not that the rest of them weren't equally shaken. Echo could be kind of obnoxious, but she was still like family.

Not that Starclops would ever say that out loud.

Nadia sighed. "I don't know. I'm kind of freaked out."

"Of course you are. We are too." Starclops accidentally yanked on a particularly stubborn tangle, earning a pained yelp from the mutant. "Sorry. Your hair kinda sucks."

This bluntness earned her a small laugh. "I know."

"It has silly tangles."

"I know."

"Fortunately, I've been prettying you up for as long as I've known you, so I am a master at everything Nadia."

Starclops didn't have to see her face to know that Nadia was rolling her eyes. "Starclops, there will be plenty of time to make fun of me later."

"Honey, I plan to do it."

"This is _serious_." That statement was emphasized by the urgency in Nadia's voice. "Echo's been _ki-illed_ , Starclops."

Oh, hell. Nadia's voice was doing that catching-thing again. Starclops conjured a band around the last cornrow and flew in front of Nadia and, in a rare show of affection, hugged her. "I know. I, uh…I feel gross saying this, but I miss her too." She pulled back. "Tell anyone I said that, and you die next."

Unfortunately, Nadia didn't even crack a smile at the comment. She just blinked back tears and looked down at her crossed legs, a sudden fury crossing her features. "I just- I- _Ugh_! I feel so _useless_! Echo's dead, and I'm sitting here getting my fucking hair braided!"

Starclops flinched. Nadia _never_ swore. The woman who referred to Hell as "Heck" actually said the F-word. What had gotten into her? Starclops knew that she was grieving over Echo, but still. Besides, Nadia had said it herself: they wouldn't be any help in the investigation. Ford was a genius, and Tad was the only one who knew how to scan. The girls would just get in the way. That's why Starclops had offered to braid Nadia's hair; she knew that their little girl talks made them both feel better. But, apparently, Nadia wasn't in the mood.

"...Are on some medication I should know about?"

Nadia sighed and placed a hand on her head, all malice gone and replaced with sadness. "I'm sorry. My hormones are kind of everywhere, right now."

Although Starclops didn't know what hormones had to do with anything, she knew what Nadia meant. "I hear ya, sister. This day's been nuts. Even for our standards."

"It's just… The way the guys are talking, it sounds like there's some kind of killer out there. And, what if they're right? I don't need _that_ around when the baby's born."

"Makes sense. The last thing we-" Suddenly, Starclops realized what she'd said. "Wait what?"

Nadia shrugged and couldn't stop herself from smiling. "While everyone was asleep, I snuck off to Mighty Med. I'm pregnant."

All talk of potential murders completely faded away as shear joy took over Starclops. She gave Nadia a side-look in mock skepticism. "Bitch, you be trippin'." Nadia laughed and shook her head. "Sweet Beelzebub, this is awesome! Does Ford know?" Nadia's kind didn't have any courtship rituals, but Ford's apparently did. The two were definitely together, but Tad had made them a document-thingy to sign so that Ford would feel better.

"Not yet," Nadia responded, standing up. "I was gonna tell him this morning, but…"

"I hear ya, girl. Wait until things calm down a little."

"What is pregnant?" The girls were startled by a deep voice with a slight Russian accent. For such a large creature, he was pretty light on his feet.

Igneous was just one of the many rock-people in this dimension. He looked like someone had stuck a bunch of bluish-gray stones together and drew two eyes and a mouth on its head. He was also about a foot taller than Ford, who was already the tallest in the group. Despite his intimidating appearance, however, he was pretty much an incarnation of the phrase "gentle giant," and had been kind enough to let them stay with him for a while. Actually, he had requested that he join them in their travels, saying that he'd always wanted to see the other dimensions. They hadn't given him an answer yet.

Starclops pointed to Nadia. "Nadia's pregnant."

Igneous squinted at the woman in question. "I thought she mutant." Starclops was still amazed that his face moved like Ford's and Nadia's, despite being on a giant rock.

Nadia chuckled. "I am a mutant, Igneous. 'Pregnant' is a term used to describe someone who's going to give birth."

To their surprise, this only seemed to confuse him more. "Birth?"

"You know, the when a baby is created."

"Bay-bee? What is bay-bee?"

"...Seriously?"

Scratching her top-point, Starclops asked, "Uh, Igneous, how do new rock-people come around?"

"Well," he pointed to the sky (more accurately, the roof of the cave) for emphasis, "Life Rain falls once a year, making magic that turns not-living stone into living-stone."

"I'm going to pretend I understood that," Nadia quipped.

"Ditto," Starclops said.

"I know, right? It sounds pretty crazy."

"What? No," the demoness pointed to a pink blob in the corner of the room, "I mean there's a Ditto over there."

The Ditto cooed and waved its...hand, for lack of a better word.

Igneous nodded. "Yes. Ditto come sometimes. It leave you alone, if you leave it alone."

The Ditto exited the cave just as Tad and Ford were returning.

Ford paused and watched the creature retreat. Tad sensed his curiosity and laughed. "That's a Ditto. They like to make fun of people by shape-shifting into them. Fortunately, their faces never change, so it's easy to tell who's who."

"Hm." Ford turned and smiled at his wife. "Cornrows, huh? Looks good on you, Nadia."

Nadia smiled, and Starclops bowed and said a dramatic, "Thank you."

"So," Nadia said, rolling her eyes at her friend's antics, "you guys find out anything?"

Ford groaned, walked over, and plopped on to the stone couch, not really caring about how uncomfortable it was. "Nothing that can really help us."

"Uh, Ford," Tad added, "there _was_ that one thing-"

"Which does not help us at this time."

Nadia sat beside her husband and gave his hand a comforting squeeze. "Anything's helpful, Ford."

It was Tad who responded. "I did a scan of her, and, in a nutshell, her, uh, soul was gone."

Nadia raised an eyebrow. "Isn't a soul supposed to leave after death?"

"Well, technically, yes. But, it always leaves some...residue, for lack of a better word, and I didn't detect any. It was like she'd never had a soul at all, which doesn't make any sense."

Igneous sat on the other side of Ford. "In travels, I hear talk of soul-stealing creatures. Succubus, incubus, Lampent, Shedinja, some mutants, I think."

Everyone looked at Nadia, who huffed and shook her head.

Ford cleared his throat. "Well, that doesn't narrow it down very much. Succubi, incubi, and mutants are, as far as I know, all across the multiverse. Though, I have no idea what a Lampent is. Or, a Shedinja."

"Those things are also fairly common," Starclops stated.

"It's something, though," Nadia reminded them. "That narrows down our options to a couple of species. Igneous, do any of those creatures live around here?"

Igneous shrugged. "I not know. I see Lampent in passing once, but live here? I not know."

Ford brightened slightly. "So, there _is_ a suspect. If we can find this Lampent-thing, then maybe we can find a way to release Echo's soul." It wouldn't bring her back, but it would probably bring her peace, and they all knew it.

Starclops rubbed her hands together in anticipation of what would surely be an epic hunt! Then, she remembered that they were dealing with things that stole souls. She wasn't worried about tangoing with a Lampent or whatever they may be dealing with, but Nadia...the baby… "Uh, Nadia, maybe you should stay behind."

"Uh…" Nadia raised an eyebrow, then realization shone as she glanced down at her stomach. "Y-Yeah…"

"Why the hell would you wanna stay behind?" Ford asked, almost suspiciously. "Earlier, you seemed more upset about this than anyone."

Tad seemed more curious than suspicious. "Yeah, you should want to know what happened just as much as the rest of us."

Nadia shot a glare at Starclops, who shrugged sheepishly. And, then Igneous ruined the secrecy by asking, "Is it bay-bee?"

"Baby?" Ford and Tad repeated.

Starclops coughed into her fist. "Uh, Tad? Igneous? I think we should leave them alone for a bit."

"Why would we-" Tad stopped, scanned a flustered Nadia, and blinked, his color brightening a little. "C'mon, guys. Let's leave the couple alone."

The demons left. Igneous shrugged, still not really understanding the whole "pregnant" thing, and followed them.

Ford clicked his tongue. "Okay, what's going on? Igneous mentions a baby, for some reason, and then they-" His eyes widened, as things started adding up. Nadia's recent mood swings, her wanting to stay away from a _soul-draining_ creature, and Igneous mentioning a… "Is it…? Are you…?"

Nadia grinned and placed a hand on her stomach (which, now that Ford thought about it, did seem a bit bigger). "I'm pregnant, Stanford. Horace says it's a girl."

Ford's heart somersaulted. He pointed to himself, silently asking for confirmation that the baby was his. Nadia laughed and nodded. Ford felt his eyes mist over, and he gently placed his hand on his wife's stomach, right over his daughter. He, the nerdy six-fingered freak, was going to be a father. "I'll be damned…" he breathed. He gazed into Nadia's equally watery eyes, knowing that she would make a wonderful mother. He kissed her deeply, the contact sending flutters through both their bodies. He then held her, not at all thinking that the bulge on her belly was making it awkward. Just the opposite; it made him never want to let go. "I love you."

"I love you, too," was her response.

After a moment, Ford's mind buzzed with questions that he really didn't want to hear right now. What happened next? They didn't exactly have a permanent home, so where would they stay? He didn't want to burden Igneous, though the rock-man would certainly let them. And, what about the soul-draining creature? It wasn't safe for Nadia to be here with _that_ running around.

"Maybe, you should stay at Mighty Med for a while," he suggested after reluctantly letting her go. "At least until things blow over."

Cupping his cheek in her hand, Nadia assured, "I'll be fine, Ford. And, so will our daughter. I know Igneous will let me stay here. We know he's dying to travel with us."

She was about to let go, but Ford grabbed her wrist, not quite ready to break contact. The last thing he wanted was for her or their daughter to be hurt (or, God forbid, _worse_ ), but he knew that she wouldn't be content to sit around without a clue what was happening to her loved ones. That just wasn't who she was. He moved her hand and briefly pressed the back of it against his lips. "Promise me you'll be okay."

"I promise," Nadia said before kissing him again.

 **KLPVNLM UZMH DROO HVV DSVIV GSRH RH TLRMT. ZOHL, HLNV KLPVNLM SZEV XIVVKRVI WVHXIRKGRLMH GSZM LGSVIH.**

* * *

 **Did you pick out the three Pokemon mentioned? Also, I'd like your opinions on what the baby should be named. I already have a name in mind, but I wanna know what you guys think.**


	31. I'm Watching You, Nerds

**You know something? This fic was meant to be a spin-off, with fan-made episodes and and mysteries and everything. But, it turned into its own little thing. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I'm still calling it a spin-off, and the mysteries were always meant to be there. So, no harm done. Except for this next line.**

 **Trigger Warning: Brief mentions of self-harm.**

* * *

 **Chapter Thirty: I'm Watching You, Nerds**

Nadia Pines couldn't stay in that cave any longer. Her husband kept insisting that she was safer in there, but _Gods above_ , was she ever bored. Just a quick look around outside wouldn't be a problem, right?

Clutching her sketchbook and pencil, she sat down on a stone...which then wiggled. She jumped up in shock, and the "stone" opened his eyes and lifted its arms. Blushing, it occurred to Nadia that she may have sat on one of the Geodudes that Igneous had told her about.

"Sorry," she said even though she didn't know if the creature could understand her.

The Geodude grunted in annoyance and hopped away.

Someone swore nearby, and Nadia turned to see her husband jogging toward her. "Finally found you. Nadia, what in hell's name are you doing? It's not safe out here."

Nadia sighed. She had been expecting this reaction. "I can't stay in there forever, Ford. I know there's someone out there, but it's been a few days, and we haven't found anything. Besides, I have powers. I can defend myself and our daughter."

Ford bit his lip. "I-I know, but…"

"We can head back, if it makes you feel better."

Ford's smile was the answer.

* * *

Seeing them together turned her mind into fire. A flame that ravaged her insides until there was nothing but ash and charcoal and hate. She hated the man. She pitied the woman.

The man was evil. A virus that lay dormant, waiting waiting waiting for the right moment, the right place, to unleashed its flurry of pain and torture. He was not to be trusted, and the poor poor woman suspected nothing.

The woman was naive, desperate for love. She may have felt love for the child growing inside her like a parasite, but she shouldn't have.

The child would be born for the wrong reason.

* * *

"I wonder what she'll be like," Nadia pondered as they walked back to the cave. The mutant hadn't realized how far she'd gone.

Ford shrugged. "Who knows? Personally, I'm still wondering how we'll take care of a baby."

"We'll figure something out." Nadia hoped he wouldn't notice that she was just as worried. She placed a hand over her growing stomach. "In the meantime, we still need to decide what to call her."

Ford wasn't stupid. He knew that she was trying to change the subject. Honestly, he was fine with it.

"I wouldn't mind naming her after my mother. Her name was-" Nadia stopped walking. Her mother's name was… Sheer guilt strangled her heart. She didn't remember her own mother's name.

"Are you okay?" Ford asked gently.

Nadia shoved the thought to the back of her mind. "Uh, y-yeah. I'm fine."

Ford found that hard to believe, but he knew better than to call her out on it. "Come on, then." She walked beside him, and he took her hand, figuring that she could use the support. Her parents had always been a touchy subject for her. The look on her face when she'd said that she'd killed them had left a nasty scar on Ford's heart.

"I hope she isn't a mutant."

The comment stopped Ford cold. "Er, what makes you say that?"

Nadia sighed and stared sadly at her bulging stomach - how long did mutant pregnancies last, exactly? "If she's a mutant, then everyone will hate her just because." Her lavender eyes were dark with sadness when she met his gaze. "Oh, Stanford, I really hope she's a human, like you. Or, a vampire, like my parents."

Nadia had told him about The Mutant War. Apparently, mutants had been feared and despised since they were first discovered. She hadn't gone into detail, but they were incredibly powerful, and people feared them for it. Tired of the constant discrimination, many of them had joined forces and destroyed anyone who wasn't a mutant. That had been before Nadia was born, but obviously the war was still fresh in a lot of creatures' minds.

"You know what?" Ford said. "I hope she is a mutant." Nadia raised an eyebrow, and Ford smiled. "I can see it now. You two are traveling across dimensions, proving to the multiverse that mutants aren't evil solely because of their species."

Nadia giggled and joined in. "She'll have my horrible hair and wear glasses and be both friendly and badass."

Ford laughed and smirked. "'Badass?' I thought you only said fuck?"

Nadia gasped in faux horror. Actually, she had a feeling that little outburst wouldn't stay secret for long. "Starclops told you!"

"It's not her fault you can't keep your potty mouth shut."

They both laughed at that, forgetting about the threat that loomed over them. For now, they were more than content with exchanging banter with the person they loved the most.

Calming down, Nadia realized in embarrassment that the collar of her long-sleeved shirt had fallen over her shoulder. She hastily pulled it back up, covering a particularly ugly scar.

Ford frowned at the motion. "What are you doing?" He asked, despite already knowing how much she hated her body. Alas, he couldn't exactly force her to be more confident. "You realize that there's no part of you that I haven't already seen?"

To his dismay, the joke only seemed to upset his wife more. Or, maybe that was just her hormones. He couldn't tell, but he was rooting for the latter. "I-I don't like my scars, Ford. You know that. And, like you said, you've kinda seen...all of me." She always blushed when sex was brought up, no matter whose it was. Just another of her adorable quirks… Now wasn't the time to think about that. "So, you know how ugly they are-"

"Ugly?" Part of Ford knew that, technically, she was right. And, yet… "I like them."

" _What_?" The way Nadia gaped at him, anyone would think he'd just said that he'd made a deal with Bill Cipher. "You can't be serious."

Ford's heart cracked at her reaction. "Of course I'm serious. Don't get me wrong; I absolutely _loathe_ whatever or whoever it was that gave them to you. But, do you know what those scars tell me about you?" Nadia reminded him of a curious puppy when she tilted her head like that. Also, adorable. Ford cupped her cheek in his six-fingered hand and stroked her scar with his thumb, feeling her face heat up. It also warmed him to know that he had the same effect on her as she did on him. "They tell me that you've been through so much. That you've suffered, you've been hurt, you've been - maybe literally - to Hell and back, and you can still smile. You can still smile and laugh like you've had the happiest life possible." He kissed her scar. "God, I wish I could do that."

Nadia sucked in air, bracing herself for a negative reaction. His words were turning her bones into jelly, and she didn't want to ruin the moment. At the same, she didn't want the man she loved believing a lie. "Some of them self-inflicted."

Suddenly, it was Ford who felt like jelly. His hand dropped from her cheek in shock, but Nadia's face suggested she thought he was disgusted. Good God, did he ever hate that look. "Self-inflicted?" Nadia looked away and blinked back tears. "D-Define ' _some_ of them.'"

"Uh…" Nadia crossed her arms, wishing he would stop asking questions. Curse his stupid, yet charming, curious nature. "Maybe… Less than half, I think."

She didn't even know? Ford's heart shattered. "None of them are recent, are they?"

"I haven't cut in years."

"Good. Er, not good that it happened, but- You know what I mean." Another thought occurred to him, and he smiled. "You realize, my earlier comments still stand."

Nadia finally looked at him. "Oh?"

"Like I said, Hell and back, still smiling, still laughing, still beautiful."

"You didn't say beautiful before."

"Didn't I?" He shrugged, that sheepish grin still on his face. "Well, that's my mistake then."

Nadia's eyes watered for much better reason. She laughed, not believing that she was about to say, "I fucking love you."

Ford laughed too. "You know, I think that just might the first time anyone's ever said those words in that order." He blinked and frowned in thought. "Of course, considering that 'fuck' is technically a slang term for sex, it is possible that-"

"Ford?"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up." And, then she kissed him.

Nearby, someone watched them with malice.

 **NFGZMG KIVTMZMXRVH WLM'G OZHG MVZIOB ZH OLMT ZH SFNZM LMVH. HL, YIZRW BLFI UFXPRMT SZRI, 'XZFHV MLGSRMT VOHV RH TLMMZ YV KIVGGB.**

* * *

 **Okay, so this particular fic is ending soon. (Don't panic; I'm making a second season.) Remember "Behind the Pines," when Alex Hirsch - and, to a lesser extent, Time Baby - talked about behind the scenes stuff? Well, I'm thinking of doing that, too! If you guys PM me enough questions - guests can leave questions in their reviews - then I just might do it!**

 **AND, I'M HELPING!**

 **And, I have no say in Bill helping! Review and PM, everyone!**


	32. Back in the Day

**Here's a nice little intermission I threw together. FYI, I purposely don't mention any names until the very end.**

* * *

 **Chapter Thirty-One: Back in the Day**

 _Glass Shard Beach, New Jersey, 1962_

The sun was harsh from its position in the cloudless summer sky, but it didn't bother the three giggling children on the beach. One of the boys and a girl, the smallest of the three, sprinted merrily across the warm sand, playfully taunting the boy in the glasses behind them.

"Can't catch us!" the girl sang.

The other boy laughed. "Yeah, you should keep up!"

"I-I can keep up!" Glasses argued.

Still looking behind her and laughing, the girl didn't notice the boarded up cave until she smacked into the wood and plopped ungracefully on to her butt. A faint moan escaped her mouth, and she blinked back pained tears. She ran a hand over her face and found that she was bleeding, but she wouldn't cry. She was six years old. Crying was for babies. Also, those soap operas her mom liked for some reason. Frankly, the girl couldn't make heads or tails of those shows. Anyway, she wouldn't cry in front of her ten year-old friends.

Glasses took her hand and helped her to her feet. "You okay?" he asked worriedly.

The girl brushed the sand from the back of her hot pink shorts. "I think so," she said, pulling her fuchsia scrunchie out from her hair and redoing her low ponytail.

"Hey, guys!" the other boy, who had a bandage on his chin, called, his pale blue eyes practically glowing. "You gotta see what the lil' missy found!"

Glasses and Lil' Missy ran up to the boarded cave, peeking through some gaps between the boards.

"Whoa!" Glasses exclaimed in awe.

"Neato!" Lil' Missy agreed. They stepped back from the boards. "Mysterious, boarded-up cave!"

"It might be filled with lost prehistoric lifeforms!" Glasses added. "Or, mesoamerican gold!"

"Or, sparkly jewels of every color of the rainbow!"

Bandage bowed and made a grand gesture to the cave. "Uh, ladies first."

Glasses nudged the girl toward it. "Yeah, you found it. You should get to go in first."

Lil' Missy grinned, and excited butterflies flew around in her belly. She grabbed one of the boards and pulled with all her might, but nothing happened. Glasses tried too, but he only ended up falling on his own butt.

Bandage laughed. "Good thing you got your smarts, Poindexter. And, you've got good looks, Lil' Missy." He proudly puffed out his chest. "I've got the other thing." He blinked in thought. "What is it called? Oh, right! _Punching_!" He thrust his hand into the wood, and it shattered, much to his friends' amazement. He glanced at his hand. "Cool! Splinters!"

Glasses pulled a flashlight out of his coat pocket - Lil' Missy wondered why he was wearing a coat in his weather - and shined it into the cave. Lil' Missy followed the light, searching for the glimmer that signified treasure.

"Whoa…" Glasses said in awe. "It's so creepy in here!"

Blarg! Creepy, shmeepy! Lil' Missy bravely walked into the cave. Ladies first, after all. "Hey, don't worry, Four Eyes. Wherever we go, we go together."

Bandage pulled a marker out of his jeans' pocket, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Don't forget to leave our names, so they know who owns the place."

His friends didn't ask who "they" were. They simply complied. They wrote their names - Stanley, Stanford, and Mallory - on the wall of the cave and ran in to explore.

 **UFM UZXG: GSV WVURMRGRLM LU "NZOOLIB" RH "GSV FMULIGFMZGV LMV" LI "GSV FMOFXPB LMV."**

* * *

 **Are you surprised? I was gonna wait until Season Two to post this...but I didn't. Sue me. :P**

 **WITH PLEASURE!**

 **It's a figure of speech, Bill. Review, everyone!**

 **YOU KNOW SOMETHING? YOU MEAT SACKS HAVE YET TO SEND IN ANY BEHIND-THE-SCENES QUESTIONS. HOW'S A GUY SUPPOSED TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTIONS, IF YOU DON'T ASK THEM? I COULD ALWAYS READ YOUR MINDS, BUT BEEN THERE, DONE THAT, Y'KNOW?**


	33. Letters to Stanford

**Oh, I was gonna post the finale of this season, but then I got this idea! I was reading Amanda Hocking's _Crystal Kingdom_ (I highly recommend "The Kanin Chronicles"), and there were intermissions where one character was writing to another character. I thought that it would be cool to... Well, you'll see.**

 **Trigger Warning: Brief mention of suicide.**

* * *

 **Chapter Thirty-Two: Letters to Stanford**

 _February 29, 1992_

 _Dear Stanford,_

 _I'm not sure how a leap year works in this case, but I think that today marks the tenth anniversary of when I got you sucked into another dimension. Or, where ever that weird science-portal-doohickey sent you. Hey, for all I know, you could be in Cleveland. Probably not, since you talked about your portal being a "gateway to other worlds," or whatever, but wishful thinking never got anybody killed. Probably._

 _I don't know why I keep writing these letters. Not like you're ever gonna read them. I guess...it kinda makes me feel better. Like, maybe you are in Cleveland, and we're pen pals or something. Yeah, yeah, it's lame, but I don't care._

 _Remember Shermie's son, Brandon? He got married last week. I think I've mentioned his now-wife, Michelle, right? Anyway, they invited me - well, you - to the wedding. I wanted to go, Ford. I really did. I told them I'd be there, but I chickened at the last minute and told them I was sick. I'm still pissed at myself. It would have been great to see Shermie and Brandon again. And, it would've been nice to finally meet Michelle. I did get to talk to her on the phone, though. She seemed real nice. Said that, when I had the time and was feeling better, she'd love to meet the "six-fingered scientist that Shermie's always bragging about." I swear, I almost broke down on the spot._

 _The Murder Hut's doing pretty good. I got a couple of complaints about the name, though. People are saying it's not "family-friendly." Think I should change it? I probably should. I doubt you would want your house to be associated with death._

 _...Actually, it's kind of ironic, when you think about it._

 _I'm scared, Sixer. I'm really scared that I might be writing letters to a corpse. You might've died the minute you went through that portal. Or, maybe you lived, and something on the other side got to you. If you are dead, then it's my fault. I killed you. Directly or indirectly, I'm not sure. I've committed a lot of crimes - stealing your identity and your house are definitely in my top 5 - but I've never killed anyone. Even I wouldn't stoop that low. Unless...I did ten years ago and didn't even know it._

 _I don't know how much more of this portal shit I can take. Even if I do manage to bring you back, I know you'll hate me even more than you did when I broke your motion machine-thing. I know I keep saying this, but it really was an accident. It doesn't matter, though. Like the saying goes, "you can't change the past." Would be nice though. Hey, Ford, any chance you got a time machine lying around? Probably just more wishful thinking on my part, but who knows? Maybe someday I'll find a time machine so that I can go back and stop myself from ruining your future at West Coast Tech. That's what started this whole mess, right?_

 _Or, maybe it was just my own stupidity. Let's face facts. I'm the family screw-up. Every family's got at least one screw-up, and I guess I just happen to be ours. I don't think I mentioned this in any of my other letters, but I'd actually been contemplating suicide. Yep. I was_ _this_ _close to driving to the nearest bridge and jumping off it. But, then you sent me that postcard…_

 _Stanford, when we were kids, we looked out for each other. I protected you, you protected me. But, that postcard was more than protection. It made me put off jumping and made me drive out to Oregon. Sure, it lead to you getting sucked into God knows where, but it gave me a reason to keep going. Stanford Pines...you didn't know it, but you saved my life._

 _You know what? I'm glad I'm still writing these letters. If I hadn't written this one, I would've given up on getting you home. But, now I realize that, if I give up, then I'd just be throwing away my second chance. Even worse, I'd be giving up on my family. And, I'm not doing that. Not again. Not_ _ever_ _again._

 _I miss you, Ford, but I'll get you home. Might take a while. I still can't find your other journals. Hell, I don't even know how many there are. But, I don't care how long it takes. I'm getting you home. One way or another, I'll see you again. And when I do, I'm welcoming you with open arms, no matter how cheesy that sounds._

 _Your brother,_

 _Stanley_

* * *

 **Yeah, anyone who's read _Crystal Kingdom_ will find this familiar. Also, I'm only a few chapters into the book, so don't spoil anything. Just review.**


	34. The Unlucky One

**I've decided that Pokemon will make many appearances. Don't panic. You don't have to know anything about Pokemon to figure out what's going on.**

* * *

 **Chapter Thirty-Three: The Unlucky One**

All Nadia had wanted to do was sketch one of those Geodudes. Ford had allowed her to draw the creatures he studied in his journal, and that was why she had been outside. But, she hadn't gone far, and she'd had Igneous with her this time. She hadn't been alone. Unfortunately, she had forgotten just how easily the rock-man could get distracted. He had spied a creature called a Purrloin, and followed it, saying how cute it was. Nadia had been about to go after him, when a voice caught her attention.

"Excuse me."

Nadia turned around. There was a probably-human woman standing before her. She was tall and very pretty, with dark brown hair that reached her wide hips and big dark blue eyes. A small smile was on her full lips, and she appeared friendly enough.

The woman glanced in the direction that Igneous had gone. "I was hoping to get you alone, Nadia."

Nadia blinked. She looked over the woman but didn't find anything familiar. She shrugged and shook her head. "I-I'm sorry. Have we met?"

"Not officially." The woman said. Nadia wondered what that meant. "My name's Mallory, and I think I can help you."

"Help me?" Nadia asked, not really sure where this was going.

Mallory stepped toward her - she was at least as tall as Ford - and took both her hands. "Listen. I know you've been trapped with those guys for a while-"

"Wait, what?"

"-but I can help you. It's not right for mutants, like us, to have to suffer just because we're different."

"Wait, wait a minute," Nadia started, pulling her hands away. This woman wasn't making any sense. "You're a mutant?"

Mallory raised her hands in mock surrender. "Guilty as charged." She lowered her hands and cast a sad look at Nadia's bulging stomach. "I've noticed that Ford made you pregnant."

Nadia wrapped her arms protectively around her stomach. "You know Ford?"

Mallory nodded. "For a long time, yeah. But, don't worry, Nadia. I know a guy who does abortions. He's a little sketchy, but-"

" _What_!?" Nadia took a few steps back. Abortions? _Abortions_!? There was no possible way that Nadia was letting _anything_ happen to her daughter! And, where the heck was Igneous!? " _Nothing_ is happening to my baby!"

For one reason or another, Mallory seemed genuinely surprised by her reaction. "Nadia, it's a _rape_ -baby-"

" _Rape_?" Was this woman serious? "I- Y-You- How could you possibly think that!?"

Mallory's dark eyes saddened. "Because people don't love mutants. That's not how the world works."

Suddenly, Nadia's heart went out to her. Since she could remember, Nadia had been an outcast solely because of her species. Almost everyone - even her father - had feared and hated her. She had grown to assume that she was worthless, that she would be better off dead.

The memory surfaced, whether she wanted it to or not.

 _At nine years-old, Nadia was ready to end it all. Everyone hated her, she'd killed her own parents, and she was nothing but a monster. She stood at the edge of the cliff, her watery eyes locked on the distant bottom._

" _Hey, kid!" A woman's provided a brief distraction. "Get away from there! It's dangerous! Unless, you can fly. In which case, knock yourself out."_

" _Go away!" Nadia called, not turning around. She didn't want anyone to see what she was about to do. It didn't seem right to die for an audience. No one should have the satisfaction of seeing what they've driven her to._

 _As though she could read her mind (Nadia would later discover that she had been doing just that), the woman's voice turned frantic. "W-Wait a minute, kid! You don't have to do this. Life gets better. You've got your whole life ahead of you!"_

 _Screw this. Nadia didn't care about having an audience anymore; this woman obviously wasn't leaving. Closing her eyes and trying to shut out the fear in her stomach, Nadia jumped off the edge…_

 _...Only to be pulled into someone's arms and back on to the cliff, far from the edge._

 _Nadia struggled, kicking and crying and screaming, but the woman wouldn't let go._

Present-day Nadia blinked her tears away. Starclops had found her. Starclops had found her and held her and let her cry until she'd run out of energy and-

"There you are." Mallory's voice snapped Nadia back to reality. But, Mallory wasn't talking to her. She was speaking to a small purple cat with cream patches and piercing green eyes, the long stretch of pink fur above which giving the appearance of heavy eye shadow. Mallory bent down and scooped up the feline, which Nadia recognized as the Purrloin that Igneous had been chasing. "This is Trixie," Mallory introduced. "Trixie, this is Nadia."

The Purrloin - Trixie - meowed in greeting.

Mallory stroked her, making her pet purr loudly. "Did you know that Pokemon, like Purrloin, are actually special breeds of mutants? They don't have the types of abilities that we do, but, like you and me, Nadia, they're in a category all their own. Even among other Pokemon."

"I...did not know that." But, Nadia was only half-listening. Sure, all Purrloin looked pretty much the same, but there was something especially familiar about this one…

"Recognize her?" Mallory asked. Nadia flushed, as it dawned on her that she'd been staring at the Pokemon. "I had her lure away that big guy you were with."

"Igneous?" Mallory had wanted him away from her? But, why? Nadia really wished she would stop being so cryptic and just explain herself.

"Was that his name?" Mallory shrugged. "Makes sense, I guess."

"Why did you want to get him away from me?"

Mallory sighed. "Have you been paying any attention to me? People hate mutants. We can't trust anyone but others of our kind. _That's_ how the world works." Trixie looked up at her questioningly. Mallory rolled her eyes. "Yes, Pokemon are trustworthy. You guys _are_ mutants, after all."

Nadia placed a hand over her stomach, thinking about everything she'd been through. Nearly everyone in her hometown had hated her. She'd killed her parents. She'd almost killed herself. She'd thought that she was dangerous, evil, a monster. On her worse days, some traitorous part of her would force her to relive those fears.

But, Starclops wasn't a mutant, and she had practically raised Nadia and had been a mother to her. Tad wasn't a mutant, and he cared for her just as much as Starclops and had been the father-figure that Nadia had never truly had. Echo wasn't a mutant, but she had been as much a family member as the demons and Ford. Ford… He wasn't a mutant and he loved her and she loved him so much.

And, mutant or not, their daughter would love her mother. Nadia just knew that they would love each other.

"Maybe, the world's changing," Nadia suggested.

Mallory blinked twice, her eyes comically wide. Then, she clicked her tongue and shook her head in disappointment. She let Trixie hop out of her arms. "Stockholm syndrome. I was afraid of that."

Nadia's mouth practically hit the ground.

"Ah, well. Guess I'm not gonna change your mind the way I wanted to." Mallory stomped on the ground, and earth shook beneath her. "So, I'm gonna kidnap you."

Before Nadia had time to process that statement, the earthquake brought dozens of stones barreling down front the mountain, and one knocked her unconscious.

 **R'EV WVXRWVW GSZG NZOOLIB'H GSVNV HLMT RH "SRG ZMW IFM" YB OLOL... ZXGFZOOB, RG PRMWZ DLIPH ULI YROO, GLL.**

* * *

 **I know what you're thinking: "Girl, you did not just kill that baby!" Don't worry. Baby's not dead. But, this is where things start getting interesting. I told you before; I have big plans for Mallory. Review, and keep PMing/reviewing those behind-the-scenes questions!**


	35. Horrible Timing

**Just a little heads-up: This chapter will freak you out and leave you wanting to murder me by the end of it.**

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 **Chapter Thirty-Four: Horrible Timing**

Ford and Tad had been going over notes on Echo, and Starclops had simply been floating upside-down for some reason, when Igneous burst back into the cave, his panicked and heavy footsteps ever-so slightly shaking the ground. But, it was when he started randomly lifting furniture and calling frantically for Nadia, that Ford's attention was completely on the rock-man.

But, it was Tad who reacted first. "Whoa, Igneous. What's going on?"

"Yeah, man, you're acting dumber than usual," Starclops added, still upside-down.

Igneous had just flipped over a table - at the same embedding it in the ceiling - when he'd turned around, looking like the entire world was about to explode. "I dumb! I follow Purrloin, but forget Nadia! She gone! I not know where!"

" _What_!?" Ford was on his feet in an instant. Nadia couldn't be out there alone! Not with the baby and the soul-draining creature! And, that earthquake that occurred mere minutes ago…

Ford's chest burned, and his vision became tinged with red. Spots started to cloud his eyes, and suddenly he realized what was happening. This always happened when someone he loved was in trouble. He had completely forgotten that he was a Protector. But, he couldn't blackout. Not this time. He clenched his fists and tried to focus on something else, but it was impossible. Images of Nadia played in his mind like a cruel slideshow. Her trapped under a boulder, collapsing into a ditch, hitting her head and losing consciousness. The spots left his vision but the redness in his sight remained and the flame in his chest had spread to the rest of his body. Fortunately, he no longer felt ready to lose himself.

"Whoa!" Starclops piped up, staring at him and flipping rightside-up. "You're all Protectory. Good. We need to find Nadia." She teleported to no more than a millimeter away from Igneous's face. Her body darkened in color. "And, if Nadia's hurt, I'm going to hurt _you_ five times as bad."

"Make it six," Ford amended. "'Cause I'm helping."

Tad flew over and pulled Starclops away from Igneous. "Everyone calm for a minute." He turned to the rock-man. "Igneous, take us to where you last saw Nadia."

Igneous nodded, and they all followed him out-

-until they spotted a round creature blocking their path. It was a ball about half of Ford's height, its upper-half being white and its lower-half being red (of course, everything Ford saw was currently red). Its face had a smirk the Ford really didn't like the look of.

But, of course, Starclops _would_ be the one to point at it and happily say, "Hey, an Electrode! I love those things. Big balls that explode in your face! What more could a girl want?" The Electrode started glowing white and emitting a high-pitched buzz. "We should take cover, now."

* * *

Nadia awoke face to face to a strange creature with yellow eyes. She blinked several times, trying to figure out where she was and why her head hurt so much. She shakily stood up from where she'd been leaning against a tree, and the memories slowly formed in her mind. Wrapping both hands protectively over her stomach, she took in the creature floating before her. It looked a little like a black lantern that burned with a bluish-purple flame, and it had black arms that lacked fingers. It had no visible mouth, but somehow Nadia knew it was grinning at her.

"Whisper, give her some space," Mallory ordered. "She's not dying."

The lamp-creature - Whisper - flew back, letting out a disappointed sound. Nadia decided that she didn't like the creature.

Mallory nodded towards it, smiling like everything was completely normal and she hadn't caused an earthquake with just her foot. "Don't mind him. Lampents like to suck up the souls of the near-dead." She affectionately patted its, er, _his_ head with a gloved five-fingered hand. "Gives them energy or something, but it can be kind of annoying."

Whisper shrugged.

All Nadia heard was "suck up the souls." Tad had mentioned Echo's body baring no remnants of a soul. Later, Starclops had confirmed that such a thing was impossible without manual interference. And, there was something hanging around Mallory's neck that Nadia hadn't noticed before: a little stone the color of Starclops.

Amber. A snark's weakness, if Ford's information was accurate.

Nadia's stomach was ice.

"Sorry for the drastic measures." Mallory didn't seem to notice her inner horror. "I just wanted reason with you, but you wouldn't listen."

"You killed her." Nadia could barely hear her own voice. Her head and throat were filled with cotton.

Mallory blinked and raised a thin eyebrow. "Pardon? I didn't quite catch that."

Nadia swallowed bile and forced herself to speak louder. "Echo. Y-You killed her. And, the Lampent took her soul."

"Wow." Mallory seemed genuinely impressed. "You're smart. I like that."

"Why?"

"Smart and curious. Reminds me of Stanford." She said that with a scowl, but there was the faintest trace of wistfulness in her eyes. "Anyway, my reasoning is something that I know you're not going to understand. See, Echo was in the way. She was trying to stop me, and I couldn't have that." She turned her back to Nadia and shooed Whisper away. "I wanna talk to Nadia alone."

Whisper nodded and floated away.

Mallory didn't turn around. Instead, she continued gazing out to the horizon. The sunset of reds and purples and oranges blurred on the canvas above. Under normal circumstances, Nadia would have vowed to paint that later. Sadly, these circumstances were anything but normal.

Nadia wondered why Mallory had turned away from her, making it completely possible for her to get the heck away from there. As badly as she wanted to run, she was frozen in place. Everything about Mallory was upside-down, inside-out, and backwards. The woman didn't make sense.

Her heart broke, when she found out why Mallory had turned around. She lifted up her sweatshirt, showing a back littered with fleshy pink stripes, like she'd been attacked by a million knives. "This is what happens, Nadia." Mallory's voice too monotone to be real. "This is what happens to mutants when they try to get close to those who don't understand." She pulled down her shirt and turned back around. Her blue eyes were so sad and desperate that Nadia wanted so badly to hug her and know what she was thinking about. "Mutants are the victims. We've been abused since the beginning, and, until the Mutant War, all we'd ever done was take it."

"But, there are good mutants _and_ bad mutants," Nadia pointed out. "Just like any other species."

"Ah," Mallory raised her index finger, "very true. And, it only adds to my point. We're just another species. We think, feel. Every species is different, yet everyone thinks that mutants are too different. It isn't fair." Her voice was steadily rising, and her eyes were burning with something that rattled deep in Nadia's bones. "They torture us, they _kill_ us! Why? Because, we have special abilities? Because, we're stronger? No! It's because we were _born_!" She let out a breath and turned around again, raking her fingers through her long dark hair, trying to regain her composure. "If anyone deserves to suffer, it's _them_ for what they've done to us, to our _kind_. They don't want us, never did want us, so why should we care about them?"

Nadia ran her hands over the scars on her arms. She had worn short sleeves today (Ford had been very happy to see that) and was beginning to regret it. Everything that Mallory was saying was true. Mutants were hated for absolutely no reason. Nadia, herself, knew what kind of torture and internal suffering a mutant had to go through. She couldn't help the feeling of utter sadness that enveloped her like a blanket and leaked tears from her eyes. It was too clear that Mallory had been through too much, and she never had someone show her otherwise. The raw pain and frustration in her words was everything that Nadia used to feel, everything she would sometimes _still_ feel.

A part of her wondered if she would have been like Mallory if she'd never met Starclops.

But, that didn't justify Mallory.

It didn't justify hating every other species.

It didn't justify wanting to abort Ford's daughter.

And, it certainly didn't justify killing Echo.

"That's why I love Pokemon so much," Mallory continued, still facing away from Nadia. "They're loyal to you and care for you regardless of species." A large white and red ball - an Electrode, by the look of its colors and seemingly permanent smirk - rolled toward her. "And, though people can order them to do bad things and do bad things to them, Pokemon don't lose themselves. They have such wonderful hearts." She patted the Electrode in greeting. "Did you blow up the bad people, Hector?" The Electrode rolled forward slightly and back in a makeshift nod. "Good." She lowered her voice, but Nadia still heard her whisper to Hector, "We won't have to worry about Ford and his crew, anymore."

Nadia felt like she had been blown up with them.

Her unborn baby must have felt the same way, because she kicked just then.

Hard.

Really hard.

Something wet trickled down Nadia's leg.

 **RH RG NV, LI WL YZYRVH ZODZBH KRXP GSV DLIHG KLHHRYOV GRNV GL DZMG LFG LU GSV DLNY?**

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 **Yeah... The title of this chapter is starting to make some cruel, sick sense now, isn't it? Review!**

 **AND, JOIN ME AS I TORTURE JET ENGINE WITH SOME OLD CLASSICS: PITCHFORKS AND TORCHES!**

 **Not you again!**

 **KEEP GIVING US BEHIND-THE-SCENES QUESTIONS _OR PERISH_! I'M JUST KIDDING. _OR, AM I_...?**


	36. Inner and Outer Demons

**Okay, so some serious stuff is going down - I'm yelling "Timber!" - in this chapter. We won't get to Nadia until the next, but this is also important.**

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 **Chapter Thirty-Five: Inner and Outer Demons**

When a demon's body undergoes massive damage, it does not lose consciousness like flesh creatures. Instead, the demon enters a state of semi-consciousness. Meaning, the demon is vaguely aware of its surroundings, but its physical body shuts down to recover.

After the Electrode self-destructed, Starclops was still aware of two things: she had somehow been taken into the mindscape, and she was not alone. At first, she had thought that maybe Tad had been sent there with her. Then, she opened her eye and found someone else with her.

...But, it couldn't have been…

 _Maybe, I'm not fully awake, yet._ Yes, that made sense. That was the only possible reason that Bill would be here. Somehow, the thought was more disappointing than comforting.

"You're up," Bill - now she was sure it was him - said blankly.

"Bill?" Starclops blinked a few times, trying to fully awaken herself. "Did you bring me here?"

"Yes."

Okay...Bill was acting weird...er than normal. Like, his mind was somewhere beyond the mindscape. Starclops let a nervous laugh. "What? You only gonna answer with a max of two syllables?"

Bill blinked, and suddenly he seemed more lucid. "I, uh…" He pointed at the floating shape behind him. "I brought Tad here, too. He hasn't woken up yet; I think he might have a concussion. But, other than that, he's okay."

As if on cue, Tad's eyes blinked open and he gazed curiously at his surroundings. Then his gaze landed on Bill, and he was, quite literally, at Starclops's side in an instant. His dark eyes blazed as he demanded, "What in Beelzebub's name are _you_ doing here?"

Bill raised his hands in surrender. "Hey, man, I come in peace. I was just-"

Tad leaned into Bill's face. "We don't give two damns about what you want, Bill! Now, get your angular ass away from us! Or, else!"

Fortunately, Tad had enough sense to back off, when Bill's yellow darkened to an angry red. "Is this where I say, 'Or else _what_?'"

Unfortunately, Tad was apparently still planning on talking back. "Don't turn my own phrase against me, you son of a-"

" _Will you two stop being dick-heads_!?" Starclops finally shouted. Men! Honestly, _men_! "And, Tad Strange, since when are _you_ the one who starts arguments, and since when am _I_ the sane one?"

"Starclops!" Tad snapped. "This is _Bill Fucking Atbash_!"

Bill pointed out, "Actually, I kept the Cipher last name, because people kept calling me that, and it just has a better ring to it than A-"

Now, _Tad_ was the one turning red. " _Quiet_ , you monster!" He grabbed an understandably startled Bill by the bow tie. "Don't think for _one second_ that I've forgotten everything you've done to my family!"

Smoke started rising around them. Starclops seemed to be the only one who noticed. She tried to say something, but she was far too shell-shocked. Thaddeus Strange was a calm, mild-mannered guy by nature, but even he could lose his temper.

Also, he apparently did _not_ have a concussion.

Another also, no one else seemed to notice that, as Tad kept talking, something else started happening around them. " _First_ , you _destroy_ Stella's heart! _Then_ , you trick Ford into building something so that you could do who-knows-what to his dimension. The _same thing_ , I might add, that pulled him from his own dimension! _And,_ you then invade Nadia's mind and force her to be _stuck with everything she's scared of_!"

"Tad…" Starclops didn't know her voice could sound so small.

"You've been fucking up for too long, Atbash! And, if you think for _one second_ that I'm letting you go easy, then-"

" _Tad_!" Starclops shouted. " _Look around you_!"

Tad glanced up from Bill and immediately let the triangle go, gazing in shock at the white flames that burned walls around them. His fists were still clenched, his eyes still glaring daggers at Bill, but his shaking fists were what told Starclops that he was freaked. "Why are you here?" he asked.

Bill straightened his bow tie and top hat and awkwardly made a throat-clearing sound. "I, er, I brought you guys here. I was trying to lend a hand. I, well, saw the explosion. Hard not to, actually. Those Electrodes sure pack a wallop, huh?" He forced a laugh at that last sentence.

Starclops couldn't help the hope rising in her heart. Bill was...himself. He actually, genuinely seemed like himself. Was he off the elixir? Or, was he just sober at the moment? She prayed for the former.

Then, Bill's image flickered and glitched like a cheap VHS tape, and he suddenly doubled over and let out an agonized moan. Starclops was at his side in an instant. Tad hesitantly flew closer.

"Bill?" Starclops grabbed his shoulders and shook him gently. "Billy? Come on, man!"

After a moment, Bill blinked up at her and squinted. "One...One-Eyed Star?" Starclops blinked. Bill didn't seem to be talking to anyone. "No, that's...the Gleeful kid. Yeah."

Even Tad seemed anxious, as he took down the flames and asked, "Bill, are...are you okay?"

Bill's black gaze was clouded and fixed on absolutely nothing. "The...The elixir. It wants me to find it. But, I won't find it. It died in my head. Or, maybe my head died in it."

Starclops stepped back, shaking hard. She had heard that withdrawal from drugs was horrible on the psyche. But, withdrawal from a magical substance? Um, how much worse was that, exactly? "B-B-Billy?"

"It's clear now." Bill suddenly exploded in a laugh tinged with the faintest trace of madness. "I totally get it! Reality is nothing but an illusion! The universe, a mere hologram! I _get it_!" Bill's insane laughter echoed around them, until Starclops couldn't take it anymore and pulled herself and Tad out of there and into the MindScape.

The one, true MindScape, where they could do whatever they wanted, however they wanted.

Where Bill wouldn't find them, unless they wanted him to.

And, Beelzebub knew they didn't want him to.

Starclops sank to her knees on the soft grass and let out a loud groan. "Why!? Why with this!?"

But, of course, the _one time_ she actually wanted Tad's words of wisdom, he just _had_ to go off into his own little world. "All that fire… Did I really do that? I-I'm so sorry, Star. I shouldn't have lost it, like that. It's just, Bill's been hurting people we love, and I was just...so angry."

Starclops shook. Then, screamed in fury, as she conjured up a small yellow pyramid and extra arms for herself. " _Biiiiiiiilllllll_!" She punched it at a merciless speed, needing to hit something out of pure frustration and agony and rage and sorrow and everything else in her heart. Without an outlet, she feared that she might hurt someone. So, she kept punching the stone even when it was reduced to dust and Tad started calling her name.

What was happening? How did everything she cared about shatter like stained glass? First, Bill - her sweet, funny, mostly level-headed Billy - got addicted to his own potion or whatever the hell it was. Then, Nadia's mind got jacked with and she and her unborn baby had gone missing, Echo got killed, Ford was either dead or seriously hurt, Tad went off the deep end, Bill tried to get better, only to get _worse_ …

Starclops barely registered when Tad yanked her away from her and held her as she kicked and clawed and screamed profanities at him, only to melt into nothing but hysterical, sobbing mess.

 **NRHGZPVH SZKKVM. HLNV ZIV QFHG DLIHV GSZM LGSVIH.**

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 **Only slightly more angst-y than I'd anticipated. But, I think it works. Review!**


	37. Hard Labor

**When we last left Nadia, she had just gone into labor. Because, all babies need a dramatic entrance, right?**

 **Warning: There will be some gore. Obviously.**

* * *

 **Chapter Thirty-Six: Hard Labor**

Not now.

Stars above, not _now_!

But, the baby wiggled in her stomach and the liquid steadily gained speed as it soaked her jeans and a sudden pain shocked Nadia's abdomen.

The baby couldn't come _here_. Not with Mallory and the Electrode. But, they wouldn't just let her leave, would they? Probably not, since Mallory had seemed so adamant about getting rid of the baby. Nadia had to give them the slip somehow. Mallory was still turned away, whispering to the Electrode something that Nadia couldn't hear.

Another contraction jolted through her. She would have to be fast. She raised her hand toward them. Nothing happened. She concentrated, imagining the frigid blast shooting from her hand, encasing her opponents in ice. Still nothing. Her powers had been weaker throughout her pregnancy, but they'd never _stopped_ working before!

Another contraction. Nadia gritted her teeth. _Just a little longer._

She grabbed a branch from the tree behind her and yanked it off the trunk. Mallory turned around at the noise, but before she could react, Nadia had already slammed the branch into her skull and knocked to the ground, unconscious. Suddenly, Nadia regretted doing that. Mallory had really seemed to believe that Nadia was in danger among non-mutants. The woman was obviously "out there" to put it nicely, but she may not have been totally evil. Just mistreated. Much like other mutants.

Much like Nadia had once been.

 _I'm so sorry Mallory._

A growl came from beside her. Hector looked rightly _pissed_.

Hector. The Electrode. A Pokemon known for causing massive explosions.

" _We won't have to worry about Ford and his crew, anymore."_

Grief and fury coiled and collided and morphed together. It was one thing to hate someone. It was something else to _kill_ someone! Pokemon only did bad things if their masters told them. Crazy or not, Mallory had gone too far.

Hector sparked and glowed and let out a harsh buzz. Knowing what was about to happen, Nadia raised her branch. With a cry of " _Fore_!" she blasted it into the Pokemon, knocking him into the sky like an over-sized golf ball.

...Well, that's she'd expected to happen.

What actually happened, was that Hector rolled a little but was still too close to her. Apparently, she had _really_ misjudged how much those things weighed.

As another harsh ripple tore at her insides - _Please, please, just hold off a little longer._ \- Nadia half-ran, half-hobbled away from the Electrode. She'd managed to get far enough that the explosion didn't seriously hurt her, but she wasn't so far that the debris couldn't attack her and send her flying forward. She barely managed to keep herself balanced and kind of running.

Then there was something wet on her shirt. Well, under it. Nadia swallowed back the burning in her throat. She didn't need to look down to know what was happening. Then scars on her abdomen had been frequently opening up since her daughter had started growing. She'd never told anyone, because she had always managed to use her powers to heal them before they got too noticeable. Besides, Ford, bless his Protector instincts, had been overprotective enough without that knowledge. She hadn't wanted to worry him any more than was necessary.

Too bad she hadn't counted on her own powers not working.

" _We won't have to worry about Ford and his crew, anymore."_

They had to be okay.

They _had_ to be okay!

* * *

Ford's skin screamed and felt like it had turned against him. He forced his eyes open and instantly regretted it as harsh light assaulted his senses and made his head pound even harder. As the grogginess faded, pain all over his body grew and spots coated his vision, making him blink them away. Warring with dizziness, he tried assess his situation. A round creature - for the life of him, he just couldn't seem to remember what it was called - had self-destructed, and the whole cave had collapsed. Where were Nadia, Tad, Starclops, and Igneous? Oh, right, Igneous had left Nadia out there alone. So, where were the demons?

Protector instincts took over and gave Ford the strength to pull himself out of the pile of stones that had buried part of him. His vision was red, but something was still off about his sight. He took off his glasses and squinted at the lenses. Sure enough, there was a sizable crack in one lens. It didn't really obscure his vision, so he didn't worry about it as he put his glasses back on.

Grabbing on to a larger stone for support, Ford grunted as he forced himself to his feet. Only to fall over again. He'd managed to land on his arm instead of the stone, but the spots and nauseating pain came back anyway as his Protector-Mode died away. He lay there for a few minutes or hours - he couldn't tell - with the side of his head growing wetter by the second. He couldn't tell if the blood was coming from his head or arm, but he was too exhausted to care. Eventually, his stomach won the war, and he coughed up its contents. He noted that he probably had a concussion.

Still he rolled over, threw up again, and attempted to stand. To his dismay, he still couldn't get his legs to-

...He couldn't feel his legs.

He could _not_ feel his legs.

They were there, but they were numb. No, that wasn't right. It was as though they weren't even _there_. Every breath became a massive effort, and Ford's entire being was an earthquake. He gulped the lava back into his stomach. His legs were there, but they weren't. They didn't move. He tried to move, tried to stand, kneel, wiggle his toes, _something_. They didn't move.

They did not fricking _move_!

Were his tears from pain or terror or a mixture of both? He grabbed the nearest blue-gray stone and heaved himself up. He glanced down.

The stone had a familiar face.

Ford let out a decidedly unmanly shriek and rolled off the stone in shock and horror. Igneous's lifeless face was trapped in his short-term memory, and it would surely reside in his long-term memory soon enough. Then, it dawned on him; it was _Igneous's_ dismembered body that had crushed him. Even though Igneous had been made entirely of large rocks, so was no gore other than Ford's own, nausea still ran through Ford's body and exited through his mouth. He _definitely_ had a concussion.

He soon became distracted by something in the corner of his vision. Suddenly, all the pain and nausea evaporated from his body as Protector-Mode took over. Nadia was stumbling and bleeding from some open wounds on her stomach. Running to her was pointless, so he half-crawled, half-dragged himself to her, calling her name. Her eyes widened when she saw him, and she cried out in pain and collapsed into the grass.

Ford pulled himself over the rocks, not caring how badly they were scraping his torso and probably his numb legs. "Nadia! What happened!?"

"I-I-I-" Nadia cried out again. "The baby!"

Shit. Oh, fricking _shit_! Ford pulled himself in front of her as fast as possible and propped himself on his elbows to undo the zipper and button on her jeans. Gripping the waist of them and the underwear beneath, Ford pulled them as far down as he could, which would have been easier if his legs would stop rebelling against him.

"F-Ford? Are you okay? Your legs look- _Ugh_!"

"Forget about me!" Ford demanded, really wishing that he'd paid more attention to that "Miracle of Birth" video in high school. Then he would know things like, how much blood was normal and was she supposed to be in so much pain and how would he know when the baby was about pop out and _how much blood was normal_. "Just-Just push! I'll catch her. I promise."

Nadia screamed. Her nails scraped the ground and tears ran down her agonized face. Ford's heart was both breaking and pounding with every passing second. Blood and amniotic fluid flung itself all over his hands and arms as he braced himself for the baby's arrival, and he fought back another wave of nausea.

After what was either a moment or a year - more likely the former - Ford gaped astonishment. "I-I think I see a head! Keep pushing!"

As Nadia grunted and moaned and shrieked, the baby's head became more visible. Thinking quickly, Ford rested his hand under the head - thank _God_ that baby was facing upward - and gently guided her out. For a moment, it seemed like the baby had stopped moving, then she suddenly burst the rest of the way out, her head being much larger than the rest of her body. Mutants apparently didn't have umbilical cords, which was a big relief since he didn't know how he was supposed to cut _that_.

Ford forgot how to breath.

She was perfect. The baby's body was too small for her head and lacked fingers, toes, a nose, and ears, and her closed eyes seemed to take up most of her face. She was covered in blood and amniotic fluid. The Protector-red of his vision made it impossible to tell what colors she was. But, she was _his_. And, she was _perfect_.

...She also wasn't breathing.

Pretending that he was not on the verge of a panic attack, Ford tried to remove his trench coat with one hand, the other propping up the baby's large head. After far too much struggling, he flipped the coat over his back and shifted to grab the other end. He rubbed against the small wet bundle, cleaning the fluid off of her and praying to whomever was listening.

Then, the baby squealed in protest, and Ford almost fainted with relief.

"Nadia," Ford said breathlessly. "Darling, she-she's okay." No response. "Nadia?"

Nadia was out cold. Ford couldn't tell what was spinning, his head or the dimension itself. Was someone talking? Was that Tad who grabbed the baby? Was that orange light Heaven or Starclops? The only thing Ford knew for certain was that sleep suddenly felt like the most wonderful thing in the multiverse.

 **VEVI HVV GSV KLDVIKFUU TRIOH? DVOO, GSZG'H DSZG GSV YZYB OLLPH ORPV.**

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 **Whew! That took some research! And, no, I've never had kids of my own, so I apologize if I got anything wrong. Review!**

 **Can't get enough of my OCs? Then read "Bill is Back" by PFDroids5198. It contains Tad, Starclops, Nadia, and possibly the baby. That said, I'm considering it non-canon to this series. Nothing against the fic, but I have plans of my own for the characters. You know how it is.**


	38. Waking Up to New Beginnings (Part One)

**This was getting long, so I broke it into two parts. We're coming down to the wire on this fic, which means that we're getting closer to the behind-the-scenes episode as well as Season Two.**

 **For this chapter, you will bare witness to something that I, oddly enough, haven't done before now: Ford and Starclops bonding time!**

* * *

 **Chapter Thirty-Seven: Waking Up to New Beginnings (Part One)**

When Ford woke up, the first thing he registered was how blurry everything looked. Where were his glasses?

"Looking for something, Dork Vader?" a familiar voice asked. Someone slid his glasses onto his face, and he finally recognized Starclops. "That probably looks better now, doesn't it? Despite the big crack, I mean. Seriously, it's a miracle those things are still in one piece."

Ford blinked twice and looked around at the white walls and took in the smell of sterilizer. He was in a bed, and his clothes had been replaced with a light blue gown-thing. The whole situation seemed familiar. Where was he?

Starclops casually rested her hands behind her top-point. "Tad and I brought you to Mighty Med, Goofus. You were pretty jacked up."

Jacked up? How was he- Then, he remembered. The explosion, Igneous's corpse - for lack of a better word - crushing him. His legs, oh God, his _legs_. He still couldn't make them move! Wait…

Ford sat up, panic sizzling in his stomach. "W-Where's Nadia? And, the baby? What happened to them?"

Starclops sat her bottom-points on his useless legs and crossed her working ones. "Relax, Sixy. Nadia's in the maternity ward, and your kid's in the nursery. Last I saw, they were both asleep."

Ford let out the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. Then Horace opened the door. "Oh, good. You're awake." He walked in, carrying a strange white handgun-like device. "I was hoping you'd be up by now."

"Good to see you again, Horace," Ford greeted. "How are the girls?"

"Well, Skylar Storm still has yet to regain her powers, and Solar Flare is as big a gossip queen as ever."

Ford had absolutely no idea who he was talking about. "Um… I meant Nadia and the baby."

"Oh, _those_ girls. Baby's healthy and so adorable, as newborns often are. We were a little worried about Nadia. She'd lost a lot of blood, and it didn't help that she's a small person who birthed a baby with a large head, but she's recovering quite nicely." Ford relaxed at the statement.

"Speaking of recovery," Starclops said, floating up to the doctor's level, "what's the deal with Ford's legs? I tried humping Ford when he was out cold-" Ford's jaw collapsed, but Starclops rolled her eye. "I'm kidding, Ford. Don't flatter yourself. Although, you do have a sexy ass; I'll give you that much."

...Was he supposed to respond? Because, he wasn't exactly sure how.

Starclops made a throat-clearing sound. "But, seriously, his legs feel weird." For emphasis, she poked Ford's leg in rapid procession until he smacked her hand away with an annoyed glare. "What's up with that, Diaz?"

"Yes, could you perhaps shed some light for us?" Ford requested.

Horace clicked his tongue. "Well, I wasn't there to see what caused it, Ford, but somehow your lower vertebrae was significantly damaged, causing paralysis from the waist, down."

Ford's stomach seized up at the word "paralysis." "But, you can fix that...right?"

Horace turned uncharacteristically serious. "No, Stanford. I'm afraid you'll never walk again." Ford didn't know if he would scream or throw up. Then, Horace burst out laughing, and Ford added punching to his list of potential reactions. "They fall for that every time!" Once his laughter died down, Horace cleared his throat. "I was just kidding, Ford." He spread out his arms to indicate the hospital itself. "Where do you think we are, Dimension 46ApostropheBackslash? They're medical technology sucks! No, you're in Mighty Med of Dimension JET98, where the medical technology does the opposite of suck!"

Ford scowled, not even trying to hide how much he despised Horace's sense of humor. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't do something _very_ inappropriate to you, using that device in your hand."

Horace grinned and held up the white gun-thing. "Because this device is called a spinal stimulator, and it's specifically designed to cure paralysis."

"Well...good, then." Naturally, Ford was still pissed by the doctor's "joke," but he felt better knowing that he wouldn't end up crippled. "I trust you know what you're doing?"

Horace scoffed. "Of course I do. Who do you think I am?" He pointed to Starclops. "Her?"

Starclops gave herself a fifth finger just long enough to make certain gesture.

Horace made it right back and then continued speaking. "Now, Stanford, while I use this device, I need you to remain absolutely still. As still as you can possibly make yourself. You may feel a little pain during the procedure, but you must hold still regardless. Understood?" Ford nodded. "Excellent." Horace pressed a button, and the small lights on the top of the stimulator glowed yellow. Horace narrowed his brown eyes in concentration. "It takes a steady hand and intense focus…" He slammed the device down on Ford's crotch, and Ford squealed in pain and instinctively covered his injury with his hands and brought his knees up to his chest. Horace grinned and raised his arms gleefully. "Congratulations! I've cured you!"

Ford gritted his teeth, prepared to cuss _very_ loudly...until he saw that his legs had bent. Suddenly forgetting his pain, he tested both legs and realized with a disbelieving laugh that they were working again.

Though, apparently Starclops wasn't over him being hit, because she grabbed the stimulator and threw it as hard as she could into Horace's crotch. The doctor let out an even less manly squeal and collapsed to the floor. In obvious mockery, she raised her arms and deepened her voice in a poor attempt to mimic Horace's. "Congratulations! I've cured you!"

Horace hoisted himself to his feet, grimacing and gripping the bed for support. "I hate you, Starclops," he wheezed. "Now...I'm gonna go lie down for a bit." He hobbled out of the room.

Once he was gone, Starclops said solemnly, "Now that we're alone, Ford, I need to talk to you."

Carefully pulling himself off the bed - and muttering an absent-minded, "Yes, yes. Good," in response to his friend's statement - Ford marveled at how well his legs could hold him up. He felt a little shaky, but that was to be expected, he supposed. He was confident that he would be as good as new in no time at all.

"I need to talk to you about Bill Cipher."

And, suddenly Starclops was the most important thing in the room. "Bill Cipher? Why do you wanna talk about that monster?"

"He's _not_ a monster!" Then, seeing how taken aback the human was by her outburst, Starclops took a moment to compose herself. "He's not a monster. He's just...not himself." Ford raised an eyebrow, silently asking for an elaboration. Starclops sighed. "He wasn't always...the way he is." She couldn't bring herself to say "evil" or "crazy." "He used to be a good guy. Like, a lower-key version of myself mixed with a demonic version of you."

Ford let this information sink in and crossed his arms. "Go on."

"Before I say anything, I wanna make a deal with you." Ford's blood froze solid. "I know that makes you uncomfortable, but this is important. I need to be _absolutely certain_ that you won't tell Nadia about this."

Nadia? What did she have to do with this? "What about Tad?"

"Tad already knows. But, I don't want Nadia knowing, because she doesn't know Bill like the rest of us do. She's only ever encountered him a few times, and none of them were pleasant. But, you, me, and Tad, we've seen Bill's better side. I know you have, because you never would have worked with him, otherwise." Ford couldn't argue there. Starclops's hand was engulfed in a mint-green flame as she held it out. "Do we have a deal?"

It was almost funny. Ford could remember a time when he would taken getting mauled by Manotaurs over making a deal with her. He shook her hand without hesitation. Her hand was hot, but not so much that it was painful. When she withdrew it and put out the fire, he sat on the bed and asked, "Now, what did you want to tell me?"

Starclops paced, meaning that she walked on the air in front of him, as she spoke. "Bill was an alchemist. He mixed chemicals and made potions and other things I don't understand for a living. One day, he made a special elixir that could cure any physical injury, no matter how deep or fatal."

Ford blinked in surprise and amazement.

"It did that, I think, but it had some, er, side effects. He tested it on himself, and-and…" Starclops stopped pacing and rubbed her arms, refusing to meet her friend's eyes. If Ford didn't know any better, he would have thought she was close to crying. "I don't know what the fuck happened. He wound up addicted to the shit and...he...changed." She took to pacing again. "Oh, Beelzebub, I just don't know how to help him. He's trying to get better and now he's getting worse and I don't know what the fuck to do and-"

"Starclops." Ford pulled her out of the air and held her close, wishing that she would go back to being the goofy pervert that she usually was. "Look, I don't know a lot about alchemy, but I do know something about addiction. Truth be told, I had alcohol problem a while back."

Starclops gazed up at him hopefully. "A-And, you recovered?"

"Well, yeah, but it certainly wasn't easy."

"But, there's hope for Bill, right?"

God, the last thing Ford wanted to do was lie to her - he honestly had know idea what Bill was addicted to or how powerful the stuff was - but she seemed so desperate and scared that he couldn't help it. "Of course, there is. I don't know what all is in the elixir, but I'm sure there's still hope."

Starclops wrapped her small arms around him as well as she could and sighed into his chest. "Thanks, Ford. Bill and I were...really close, back in the day, so I needed that reassurance. Even if you are just saying that to make me feel better, and don't try to deny it."

They sat like that for a moment, then Ford said, "You know, I think I've finally got you figured out."

Starclops looked curiously at him. "Oh?"

"Forgive me if I'm way off here, but you're a broken girl. You don't want anyone's worry or pity, so you hide behind a mask of silliness and general weirdness."

Starclops let go of him and floated up to look him skeptically in the eye. "How do you know I'm not just nuts?"

Ford raised his hands in mock surrender. "I never said that. I just meant that you're trying to hide how deeply hurt you are, and you forgot that Tad, Nadia, and I are your family and would gladly help you in any way we can, regardless of whether or not we truly understand."

Starclops crossed her arms and was silent for a long time, but Ford heard the watery smile in her voice when she finally said, "I love you, ya big dork."

Ford smiled softly and quipped, "Thanks, but I'm already married."

"Don't flatter yourself."

 **R'EV WVXRWVW GSZG GSV GSVNV HLMT ULI YROOXOLKH (YROOCHGZIXOLKH) RH "XIZAB" YB WZFTSGIB.**

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 **Aw, how sweet! The next chapter will probably have some Tad and Nadia bonding, which is something else I haven't done yet. Review!**


	39. Waking Up to New Beginnings (Part Two)

**Ah, here's that Tad-Nadia-Bonding chapter I promised!**

* * *

 **Chapter Thirty-Eight: Waking Up to New Beginnings (Part Two)**

Nadia was so sore and exhausted that the last thing she wanted to do was wake up. Alas, her body just wouldn't seem to go back to sleep, so she forced her eyes to open and adjust to the harsh light around her. What the heck happened to her? And, where was she? And...was she wearing a hospital gown?

"Hey." Tad had his elbows propped on the bed she was lying in. "Are you okay?"

Nadia blinked, and memories flooded back to her. She bolted upright in panic, which was a bad idea because her head swam, and everything from her breasts-down ached even more.

Tad floated up and put a steadying hand on her shoulder. "Easy. Easy, girl. You've been through a lot."

"Where are they?" She didn't have to specify whom she was asking about.

"Ford's in room 618. Baby's in the nursery. Last I checked, both were asleep."

Nadia nervously bunched her thin blanket in her hands. "Okay, but-but _how_ are they?"

Tad sighed, and she didn't like the sound of it. "Well, the good news is that your daughter is about as healthy as a newborn can be. The bad news-"

"Bad news?"

Tad moved his hand off her shoulder and used it to scratch his top-corner. He didn't meet her frightened gaze. "Well, it's Ford. Horace says that he's in bad shape, but he didn't say anything else." Nadia squeaked and brought her hand over her mouth. "But-But, he said he can help him," he amended quickly. "Ford's in good hands."

Mentally forcing her heartbeat to slow, Nadia released her blanket. "What about you and Starclops? And, what happened to Igneous?"

Tad paused too long. "I'm not sure what became of Igneous." His lie pretty much told Nadia the truth, if that makes any sense. She bit her lip and swallowed hard. "Star and I are okay, though. She's with Ford, said she wanted to talk to him about something private. We, uh… Okay, how much of the truth do you want to hear?"

 _None of it_ , is what Nadia thought after hearing her friend's hesitance. "All of it," is what she said.

"Okay," he sighed. "Well...after the explosion, Starclops and I woke up in the mindscape. Someone saw what happened and sent us there to treat our injuries."

"Who?" Tad didn't say anything. "Tad? Who helped you?"

Tad groaned and pressed his palms to his eyes. "Beelzebub be damned, woman! Is it really important _who_ did it?" Nadia blinked at her normally laid-back companion. He crossed his arms and sighed, not meeting her eyes. "Sorry. I-I'm still kinda fried from the whole thing."

Nadia ran a hand through her tight, tangled curls. "It's been a crazy day."

"Yeah. Now, I guess you want me to tell you-"

"I-I don't want you to feel like you have to."

Tad was quiet for so long that Nadia wondered what had happened while she was gone. It obviously wasn't anything good. Finally, Tad made a throat-clearing sound. "Nadia, I...I want to strike a deal with you." Nadia tilted her head curiously. "I'm going to tell you what happened in the mindscape, but you _cannot_ under _any_ circumstances, tell Starclops I told you this. It's a very sensitive subject for her."

Starclops was fun-loving and overall goofy by nature, but when she broke, she _shattered_. And, it wasn't easy putting her back together. Nadia nodded. "It's a deal."

Tad's hand lit up in a snow-white flame, then he caught himself and quickly extinguished it. Nadia realized that he'd never told her why he was so afraid of fire. But, he was already uncomfortable enough. Maybe another day. He looked everywhere that wasn't her. "Er, y'know? This doesn't really have to be a Demon's Deal. Maybe just one between friends."

Nadia nodded. "Yeah. Okay."

"Cool. Now, then." Tad took a deep breath. Probably. "Well, we were sent into the mindscape and cared for...by Bill Atb- Bill Cipher, actually."

Was Nadia on some kind of morphine or something? Because that was the only thing that could explain what she just heard. "E-excuse me?"

Tad nodded. "Yeah. I had a hard time believing it, myself. But, the truth is, he wasn't always the deranged lunatic that you know him as. There was a time when he wasn't that terrible. Nice, even."

Nadia leaned back against the bedframe and crossed her arms. "I find that hard to believe."

"I'm not making this up. Anyway, I don't know what happened to him, but he just kinda...changed, I guess. Starclops knows what happened, but she won't tell me about it. And, today," Tad shrugged, "I don't know. He seemed like he was trying to be nice. I do confess that I _might_ have blown up at him."

"You?" Nadia raised an eyebrow. "Blow up?"

Tad laughed awkwardly. "It doesn't happen often. After I, well, yelled a lot, uh, something happened…"

Nadia knew that look. There were some things that Tad _really_ didn't want to discuss, things that made him more uncomfortable or ashamed than others. When something like this came up, he closed off completely or changed topics entirely. Nadia always hated when this happened, because she could always tell how badly her friend wanted to get something off his chest. Usually, she wouldn't push him, but if this involved him, Starclops, _and_ Bill, then she needed to know.

She offered what was hopefully a comforting smile and reached out to stroke his corner, remembering that he liked that. He responded by floating a little closer to her. "It's okay, Tad. You can tell me anything."

"Uh…" He grabbed her wrist and moved her hand off him, the slightest tint of pink coating his blue body. Nadia couldn't help grinning. He was such an open book. Which made looking at the sadness and guilt in his eyes all the harder. "After I lost my temper, Bill...kind of went, er, crazy, for lack of a better description. He-He was spouting all this nonsense about reality and holograms or whatever the hell he was saying. I just…" He sighed and hovered down to sit beside her. He hugged his knees to his chest, and Nadia wrapped an arm around him. "The thing is, I'm worried that it's my fault."

"That what's your fault?"

"Bill seemed like he was doing fine, until I snapped at him. I'm worried that I might of triggered something by mistake and sent _completely_ off the deep end."

So, that's what was wrong. Nadia didn't really understand any of that, but her heart went out to Tad anyway. They were both silent for a while, lost in their own thoughts, then Nadia said, "How do you know it was your fault?" Tad quizzically looked up at her. "Maybe, Bill was going to lose it no matter what, and you just happened to lose it at the same time."

Tad laughed bitterly. "Maybe, maybe not. Who knows?"

"I know you." Nadia wrapped her other arm around him and lifted him on to her lap, despite him half-hearted protests. "And, I know that you would never intentionally hurt someone."

"Tell that to Starclops."

The way Tad tensed, Nadia had the feeling he didn't mean to say that out loud. But, that wasn't why his words bothered her. "Starclops?"

"After we got away from Bill, she had one of her infamous meltdowns. Again, this stays between us. What happens in Vegas _stays_ in Vegas." Nadia didn't know what Vegas was, but she nodded anyway. "Starclops screamed at me, saying I pushed Bill too far by screaming at him. She said he would've been fine if I had just let him explain himself. To add insult to injury, after her screaming was over… I-It took a while to get her to stop crying…"

Nadia struggled to push back the sadness clawing at her insides. Curse her over-sized heart. But, why would Starclops have been so upset over _Bill_ of all people? Were they friends before or something? "I'm sure she was just upset. People say all kinds of things when they're upset."

"Yeah, probably. It still hurts, though. But, thanks for listening."

Nadia smiled. "Feeling better?"

Tad nodded and floated out of her grip. "Yeah, a little. I'll talk to Star later."

" _Hi there_!"

Tad and Nadia cried out in surprise, when Starclops popped up from under the bed. Crap, crap, _crap_ , how much did she hear?

Tad asked nervously, "Uh… How long were you...under there?"

Starclops waved dismissively, somehow looking almost as nervous as they were. "That doesn't matter." Her eye turned into a mouth as she hacked up a few dust bunnies. The mouth turned back into an eye, and she asked, "So, whatcha guys talking about? I heard my name, so it must be something good!"

Nadia relaxed a little. So, she didn't hear anything. The barely-hidden sadness in her eye must have been over Bill.

Starclops perched herself on Nadia's shoulder and kicked her legs. "So, Ford's up, doing great, put on his clothes, including that trench coat he's always wearing. I got to see his sexy bottom! Don't tell him. He doesn't need to know."

Nadia wondered how much of her strangeness was real and how much was currently fake.

 **ZOO LU RG DZH XFIIVMGOB UZPV. HGZIXOLKH SVZIW VEVIBGSRMT GSVB HZRW.**

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 **I know what you're thinking: _Where the hell is that baby!?_ She's in the next chapter. Review!**


	40. Waking Up to New Beginnings (Part Three)

**So, we have this chapter, then an epilogue, then the behind-the-scenes special, then the second season.**

 **In unrelated news, as I type this I have _Dark On Me_ by Starset stuck in my head. Actually, that song kind of fits Ford and Stan.**

 **Warning: _Extreme_ levels of cuteness. Viewer discretion is advised.**

* * *

 **Chapter Thirty-Nine: Waking Up to New Beginnings (Part Three)**

Stanford leaned against the wall outside of the nursery, anxiously tapping his foot and glaring daggers at the floor. What was taking Horace so long? Was the baby okay? Did something happen to her? Ford remembered clearly the moment he had first laid eyes on her. She was covered in gore, and it had taken a while for her to start breathing. Ford's stomach tripped over itself. What if there was some complication during the birth? Or, even during the pregnancy? What if Ford had done something wrong? Heaven knew he'd never delivered a baby before, never knew he would even have to!

Where in God's name was Horace!?

Just when he was ready to walk into the nursery himself, Horace walked out, but it was what - or rather, _whom_ \- he was carrying that destroyed whatever walls Ford could have ever put up.

The bundle in the doctor's arms looked so much smaller than he remembered. Her head was just as big though, but she would probably grow into it. She was now swaddled in a little pink blanket, her large eyes closed as though sleeping. She had her father's pale skin and was already sporting a head of his brown curls. Recalling her lack of fingers and toes, and seeing her lack of nose and ears, as well as the size of her eyes, it was clear that she was a mutant, like her mother.

Ford's heart suddenly had the consistency of pudding. He'd never believed in love at first sight, but he'd also never been a father before.

Horace grinned at the watery sheen of his eyes. This part of the job never got old. He held out the sleeping infant. "You wanna hold her?"

Not trusting his voice not to break, Ford nodded, holding out his arms as Horace passed the baby on to him. Ford gazed in awe of the child, still unable to believe that something so precious could have been his. He held her close but as gently as he could, unaccustomed to holding babies. Yet, at the same time, it just felt so natural, so...right. The infant snuggled into his chest, closer to his heart. Could the little one hear how hard it was pounding?

Horace tapped on his shoulder, forcing him to redirect his attention. "Nadia's in room 210." He pointed down the hall. "Last door in this wing. Can't miss it. It's got a big 210 on it. Also, Tad and Starclops seem to be conversing in front of it."

It was true. The two demons were in the hall, but Ford couldn't hear what they were saying. But, it didn't matter. Because, once Horace left, saying he would check up on Nadia and the baby later, Ford was left with his daughter, and nothing else in the world seemed to matter.

Especially, when she slowly peeled open her large eyes for the first time, and holding back the joyous tears grew all the harder for Ford. Her eyes were beautiful, for she was lucky enough to obtain her mother's soft violet irises.

Violet… That was a good name. Hopefully, Nadia would agree.

Swallowing hard, Ford cooed at his daughter, "Look at you. I can't believe you're here. My God… You're so beautiful." The infant gazed up at him, as though she could understand him. Maybe she could. Ford still wasn't sure how a mutant's brain developed. He found that he didn't care at the moment. He kissed her forehead, and she made the tiniest of sounds in response and smiled. A tear slid down Ford's cheek at the sight. "I don't know if you can understand me, but listen. You are a mutant. So, there's a chance you're going to get a lot of grief. But, I love you, little one. And, no matter what happens, I never want you to forget that."

She responded by sticking out her little pink tongue, making him chuckle.

* * *

Tad had a pretty good idea of why Starclops wanted to see him the hallway alone. So, when she put on her most flamboyant display for Nadia and practically tossed him outside, Tad decided that it was best to let her get everything off her chest first.

Starclops closed the door with a sigh and paused there for a moment. But, Tad was her best friend since childhood. If she couldn't let her guard down around him, then who? Gathering up her remaining dignity, she turned around but was unable to face that familiar coal-black gaze. "Look, Tad. I...I'm really sorry about earlier."

"Hey, don't apologize." Tad laid a comforting hand on her pointed shoulder. "You've been through a lot. And, honestly, I think I should be apologizing. I shouldn't have went off, like I did."

"Bill wasn't your fault." She grabbed Tad's hand off her shoulder and sadly held his wrist in both of her hands. "I-I heard what you and Nadia were talking about."

Tad blinked, though he'd suspected as much. "Oh."

Starclops finally forced herself to meet his eyes. "I didn't mean to make you feel bad. It's just… Bill was my world, ya know? He was my husband, once. I still care about him and seeing him like that…" Starclops rubbed her eye in frustration. "Ugh. This isn't coming out right."

Tad gently took her hands in his and soothed, "It's okay. I'm not mad."

Starclops was silent for a while, then her gaze softened, and she hugged him. "You don't know how glad I am to hear that."

Smiling inwardly, Tad returned the embrace.

Someone cleared their throat, and they let go. "Pardon me, but you're kind of blocking the door," Ford said with a smile.

Tad's eyes caught on the small creature in his arms. The baby's over-sized head was tilting this way and that, taking in everything she could find. "Ford, is-is that…?" Ford nodded, looking ready to burst with happiness. Tad didn't blame him. "Stanford… She's gorgeous."

"Wow." Starclops floated closer and locked eyes with the infant, completely and utterly amazed. "Oh, mighty Beelzebub, you are just so precious!" The baby stuck out her tongue, and Starclops jumped back and gasped. She pointed half-accusingly, half-playfully at her. "She stuck her tongue out at me!" Ford and Tad couldn't help laughing. "I gave her a genuine compliment, and she stuck her tongue out at me!"

Tad composed himself enough to say, "Why-Why don't you show Nadia, Ford? Star and I'll hang back and give you guys some privacy."

Starclops nodded. "Yes, yes. Privacy. Just don't go having any celebration-sex in front of the little mutant. If anyone's going to scar her for life, it's going to be me."

Ford rolled his eyes and slowly pushed the door open with his hip.

Once the door closed again, Starclops snapped her fingers. "Welp, time to go scare the shit out of the other newborns! This should be fun!"

"Wait, what?"

Before Tad had any time to process that statement, Starclops had already teleported into the nursery and shouted, " _Hey, newborns_!" This, naturally, was followed by the sound of several babies crying.

Tad rolled his eyes. "And, here comes security." Still, it was nice to see Starclops back to her old, wild-card self.

* * *

Nadia heard the door open and assumed that Tad and Starclops were through with whatever they had been talking about. The man who actually entered lit up her world even more. "Ford! You're oka-" Then, she spotted the small bundle in her husband's arms, and everything else disappeared. "It… She…"

Ford sat down in the chair beside her bed and held out the tiny infant, looking more proud and content than he had in a long time. "She's ours, darling."

Her trembling hands calmed down once the baby was safely rested in her mother's arms. Nadia's eyes and heart filled to the brim at the sight of her. Her father's skin and hair, but she had her mother's eyes and was a clearly a mutant like her. The child gazed up at her mother and stuck out her tongue. Nadia giggled.

Ford chuckled, "Violet did that to me and Starclops too."

Nadia looked up at him and tilted her head. "Violet?" She had never heard of anyone being named after a color. Or, was he referring to their daughter?

"Uh," Ford rubbed the back of his neck, a faint blush creeping across his face. "It-It's a name in my dimension. I-If you don't like it, we can, you know, call her something else. It's just- Well, she has your eyes, and they're, well, you know-"

"I like it," Nadia cut him off. "It's a good name." She looked down at the baby- She looked down at _Violet_ and found a huge, toothless grin on her face. A sob broke out of Nadia, and she swiped at her eyes with one hand. "You like it too, don't you?" Violet went cross-eyed and her tongue rolled out of her mouth. Both parents laughed. "You're gonna be doing that a lot, aren't you?"

Ford gently took her free hand and kissed the back of it. Whatever was left in Nadia that their daughter hadn't already melted, the raw emotion in Stanford's ocean-colored eyes finished the job. He leaned in, mindful of their baby, and softly kissed his wife's dark lips. A tingling warmth spread through her body, and, as always, she wished he wouldn't have pulled away so soon. His six-fingered hand reached up and taught the tear that escaped her lashes. His hand lingered there as his thumb caressed her scar.

"Nadia," he breathed. Nadia loved when he spoke to her like this. His eyes would darkened with love; his voice would deepen with emotion. Stanford Pines felt things deeper than anyone she'd ever met. "You have no idea how much I love you."

Nadia's eyes welled from both emotion and scattered hormones. But, mostly emotion. Probably. "If it's half as much as I love you…"

Sadly, their moment was obliterated by a loud knock at the door. A voice they hadn't heard in a long time called, "Uh, dudes? I apologize if I'm interrupting some kinda, like, romantic-thing. I, um… Oh, oh, gosh, I don't how this works. Okay, can I come in? Or, should I leave or somethi-"

"Oh, clam up, gopher!" Starclops kicked the door in. "I know we haven't seen you in a million years, but I think I'd remember you being this stupid."

The familiar human-sized gopher in an orange polo shirt shrugged. "I guess we're going in now. Haha!"

"Larman?" Ford clarified. "Man, it has been a while."

The group had encountered Larman several times on their adventures, and more often than not, they would help each other out or join each other on certain quests. But, what was he doing here?

Nadia was about to ask but Larman's face lit up and he raced over and gazed happily at the baby in her arms. "Oh, look at you! You're the littlest dawg I've ever seen! Are gonna be handsome, like your daddy?" Tad informed him of baby's gender. "Are you gonna be pretty, like your mommy?"

"It's nice to see you, Larman," Nadia greeted, "but what are you doing here?"

Larman redirected his attention. "Well, ya see, Horace and I go way back, and he called and said you dudes might need somewhere to stay. You know, raise the kid and stuff. And, I like to let travelers stay at my mansion. Some of them just stay there the night, some of them live there-"

"Wait, wait, wait," Ford interrupted, voicing his wife's thoughts. "We've known you for years, and you never _once_ said anything about a mansion."

"I didn't? Huh. Well, my family's rich, and my parents left me their mansion in their wills. And, since a single guy, like me, doesn't really need that much space, I like to let my friends stay there whenever they need to."

Nadia was floored by the offer. "Larman, you realize it takes more than a few days to raise a child."

Larman laughed. "Girl-dude, I got a family who's been living there for twenty years now. Hey, I like 'em, and if they wanna stay, I'm cool with it. And, I like you guys. So, I'm inviting you to raise, uh…"

"Violet," Nadia informed.

"If you wanna raise Violet there, then be my guest. Long as you help out around the place, I won't even charge you."

Ford blinked. "That-That's a pretty big offer."

Larman shrugged. "Let's face it, dudes. Two of you are mutants, and a lot of multiverse is afraid of you. But, I've met enough mutants to know better. And, Dimension 52 is one of the more tolerant dimensions. So, what do you say? Wanna live there?"

Ford was right; it _was_ a big offer. It didn't really seem right to stay for free, and they could always get jobs in that dimension to pay him. Larman said they could pay him by helping out around the place, but still…

Of course, it would be too dangerous to take a baby dimension-hopping.

After a long discussion, they decided to take Larman's offer.

 **DSZG WL BLF GSRMP? OFXPB YIVZP LI GLL TLLW GL YV GIFV?**

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 **So, I think you all can figure out where Season Two will take place. Remember, epilogue then behind-the-scenes. Keep PMing those questions! Review, folks!**


	41. Epilogue

**Yeah, I know. It's short, but it's important! And, you're about to see why!**

* * *

 **Epilogue**

The room reeked of cheap air freshener, and the lighting was dim. Okay, the lighting was always dim, but it seemed darker than usual in her boss's office. Really, the only source of light seemed to be the desk lamp shining on his empty desk. He was wearing his usual black coat and kept the hood up, the shadow from which completely hid his face in the low light.

His deep voice seemed to echo off the walls. "Was the mission successful, Ms. Rogers?"

Mallory Rogers was still kicking herself for her failure. "I'm sorry, sir. I couldn't get Nadia on our side."

"I see." The disappointment in his voice made her want to scream. Then, he sighed. "I should have suspected as much. Based on what you've told me, she seems to be quite...fond of them."

Mallory didn't need to ask who "them" were. "I did get you a soul, though."

Strangely, he didn't seem impressed by that. "Yes, you mentioned that. A snark, yes?"

"Yes…" Why wasn't he happy? The more souls he absorbed, the more powerful he became, right? "I thought you wanted to take in as many souls as you could."

Her boss sighed. "Tell your Lampent to release that soul."

"What?"

He folded his hands on his desk. "Allow me to explain something to you, Rogers. The amount of power a soul gives me depends on the size of the creature it is extracted from. Say I absorb one from a man my size. Now, would you agree that I'm a decent size, for a man my age?" Mallory nodded. "Well, then that soul would give me a great deal of power. But, a snark? Too small. It would be like...like trying to build a house out of crushed bricks. Doable, but not worth the effort. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

Mallory nodded. "Yes, sir. I will instruct Whisper to release the soul into the Spirit World."

"Very well. And, as for Nadia, don't waste your time. I've seen mutants like her before. She won't budge."

"She was pregnant, last I saw her." This seemed to catch his attention. "Do you think the child would join us? Or, do you think he or she would end up like Nadia?"

He propped an elbow on his desk and rested his chin on his fist in thought. "Hard to say. We'll wait until the child is older then see if we can recruit it. In the meantime, you are are relieved from spying on Nadia, but keep check up on the child whenever you have time. See if it shows any signs of, uh, rebellion, for lack of a better word."

"With all due respect, sir, the child would be a _baby_."

"Mutant genetics are tough to crack, Rogers. Some of our kind develop quicker than others. This baby could be born coherent, develop at the rate of a human or somewhere in between. Really, no one can say. Still, check up on it once or twice. We'd have to hold off until it's older either way, but I'd like to know how quickly its brain develops. Dismissed."

"Yes, Guardian," Mallory said before turning and walking out the door.

 **GSV HGLIN DROO YIVZP,** **GSV** **KRMVH DROO UZOO. Z HGIFTTOV ULI KLDVI GL IFOV GSVN ZOO. LMV NFHG HGZMW, LMV NFHG IRHV. YFG, RH IVGFIMRMT SLNV IVZOOB Z KIRAV?**

* * *

 **Next stop: behind-the-scenes!**

 **I'M STILL HELPING!**

 **Review so that Bill doesn't get me killed.**

 **REVIEWING WON'T GUARANTEE THAT, BUT YOU SHOULD DO IT ANYWAY.**


	42. Between the Pines

**Between the Pines: Portal Edition**

GREETINGS WORTHLESS SKIN SACKS! THE NAME'S BILL CIPHER. I HAVE CAPTURED JET ENGINE AND TAKEN OVER HER BODY SO THAT I CAN ENLIGHTEN YOU ON THIS THING YOU CALL A FANFICTION!

Bill is a big, dumb Dorito.

AM NOT!

He did not possess me, but he did threaten my existence if I didn't let him do this with me.

WE'RE HERE TO TELL YOU ALL THE THINGS YOU DIDN'T KNOW OR CARE ABOUT THE "BEFORE THE FALL" TRILOGY. NOW, WITHOUT FURTHER ADO…

 **IT BEGINS**!

 **General.**

Way back before I even thought about starting this series, the concept was that Ford was traveling with _just_ Tad Strange, and no one else. Then, I saw a YouTube video by Vailskibum94, which discussed a fan theory that the Tent of Telepathy symbol was actually a dream demon. So, I started thinking about Starclops. Starclops will eventually discover the symbol and be greatly offended by it.

WHO WOULDN'T BE? THE SYMBOL'S SO DAMN UGLY.

Wanna hear something even weirder? Starclops was the original love interest to Ford!

...

Hey, in my defense, her original character was more like Stanley than...the way she is now.

SO, YOU SHIP STANCEST, THEN?

No, that is not what I meant. I do confess that I read Stancest, but I will never write about it.

BUT, YOU DON'T HATE IT.

So, I was reading _The Lunar Chronicles_ by Marissa Meyer, and I thought that the character, Cress, would be a good match for Ford.

AND, SHE'S IGNORING ME.

I decided to make Cress a human researcher who was sucked into her own portal and who would end up as Ford's love interest. Then, it occurred to me that I would just be copying someone else's character, so I nixed the idea. Then, I was looking up different supernatural creatures and thought that an imp could work. Then, I read more about them and realized that they did not sound or look anything like the character I had in mind. Actually, when I wrote the prologue, in my mind, Nadia was a banshee, because that's another paranormal thing that I think is cool. Then, at the last minute, I thought, "You know what? Let's call her a mutant. That's so broad, you can do anything you want with it."

At first, there wasn't really a plot in mind. It was just the three of them going on adventures. Then, a bunch of stuff started working its way into my brain. Honestly, I can't even tell you where half of this mutant stuff came from. I just sort of thought of it and liked it. Things like Bill's backstory, those actually came from somewhere. The elixir was inspired by _The Immortals_ series by Alyson Noel. The Protector came from the _Shadow Falls_ series by CC Hunter.

YEESH, YOU'RE MORE OF A BOOKWORM THAN SIXER, AREN'T YOU?

And, proud of it!

 **Stanford "Ford" Philbrick Pines.**

You all know who Ford is. Author of the journals. Future great uncle to Dipper and Mabel. Twin brother to Stanley Pines.

SIX-FINGERED NERD.

But, in this fic, we allude to _Shadow Falls_ by making him a Protector: a being that gains power from the need to protect his or her loved ones.

HOW CHEESY.

Some of you may feel that this is just some random thing I did to make Ford better-fit in with his new group. Actually, I've got a little something planned for that particular little trait.

 **Tad Strange.**

If you're a _Gravity Falls_ fan, you may be familiar with the Tad Strange Theory. It popped up before we found out that Tad Strange was just a brief gag in "The Stanchurian Candidate." Obviously, that doesn't stop people like me from turning him into a dream demon.

BECAUSE, YOU FANS HAVE NOTHING BETTER GOING ON IN YOUR LIVES, RIGHT?

I'd argue with you, Bill, but you're pretty much on the ball with that one.

WELL, I _AM_ ALL-KNOWING.

You're also very full of yourself.

THAT, TOO.

Tad's that character on a TV show or a novel or, in this case, a fanfiction that the main characters can talk to. The approachable one. The one who'll listen to you and who'll keep an open mind and a level head. He's also the kind of person that I wanna be.

SO, YOU WANNA BE SOMEONE PYROPHOBIC? UH, PYROMANIC? HEY, JET, IS HE PYROPHOBIC OR PYROMANIC? I CAN'T REMEMBER.

I thought you were "all-knowing."

DUDE, I _JUST_ FINISHED REGENERATING FROM GETTING KILLED IN CRESCENT'S MIND. YOU CAN'T EXPECT ME TO HAVE _ALL_ MY POWER BACK YET.

Fair enough.

 **Stella "Starclops" Cipher.**

Tad and Starclops met when they were small children. The latter was the new girl on the block at the time. Tad's older brother, Barry Strange, dared him to kiss her. Being the little that he was, Tad ran up to her and kissed her on the...let's call it a cheek. Starclops responded by kissing him passionately on the "mouth," punching him in the eye, and running away, laughing hysterically. Tad remembers that, but Starclops doesn't.

I GOT PUNCHED IN THE EYE ONCE. IT WASN'T FUN.

Starclops is the biggest goofball you'll ever meet. But, as we go through the series, we start to see her break down bit by bit. After what happened with Bill, she's deeply afraid of letting anyone in. Think of the song _Because of You_ by Kelly Clarkson, and that'll pretty much sum it up. Pay special attention to the lyrics. There's a certain part of that song that will hint at some _massive_ damage that's caused because of the walls that Starclops puts up. Eventually, all of those negative emotions that she's been hiding _will_ come out. Trust me.

…

You're awful quiet, Bill.

STARCLOPS HAS ALWAYS BEEN A GOOFBALL. IT'S IN HER NATURE.

…

…

...Moving on.

Starclops and Bill met in high school, when they both had detention on the same day. She got it for starting a food fight that nearly blew up the cafeteria, and he got it for actually - _un_ intentionally, mind you - blowing up his science teacher, the ironically named Mr. Boomer. (Mr. Boomer was okay. Just some bruises and a ruined polo shirt.) The woman in charge of detention that day had fallen asleep, so Bill and Starclops started bonding over their shared love of most things odd.

 **Nadia Adaleen Blackburne-Pines.**

Nadia tries to be kind to everyone, because she doesn't want others to have to go through the pain and suffering that _she_ went through by being a mutant.

AGAIN, I SAY, HOW CHEESY.

She loves art so much, because it allows her to express all of the things that she can't put into words. It also gives her an outlet for when she's upset, so unlike Starclops, she doesn't keep her emotions bottled up. Plus, she thinks it's fun and is very passionate about it.

YOU'RE BRINGING STARCLOPS INTO THIS JUST TO SPITE ME, AREN'T YOU?

We learned in "Nadia's Labyrinth" that she inadvertently killed her parents when she was just a little girl. We also know that one of her powers did this. Obviously, it wasn't her healing ability. So, it was probably the ice, right?

 **OR** , WAS IT SOMETHING WE DON'T KNOW ABOUT YET…?

Hm. Food for thought, I guess.

 **Violet Pines.**

A lot of you may be familiar with a show called _The Powerpuff Girls_. Not the reboot; the original. One of the early episodes is about a one-time character named Bunny. She'd turned out...wrong, because the girls used the wrong ingredients to create her.

THE "INGREDIENTS" PART MAKES MORE SENSE, IF YOU WATCH THE SHOW.

Long story short, she ended up exploding at the end of the episode.

My original plan for Violet was that she was a reincarnation of Bunny but without the deformities. Instead, she looks like a regular Powerpuff Girl. There was gonna be this crossover special, where the girls meet Violet and think she's Bunny, and she would be Bunny, but she wouldn't realized that…

Honestly, I don't think that's gonna happen anymore. It might, it might not. Who knows?

 **What's to Come.**

Season One was basically just me figuring how I want the series to go and how I'm going to write these characters. Seasons Two and Three will get more into the underlying plot of the trilogy. We'll learn a lot more about Mallory and Guardian. There'll be more revealed about mutants and Protectors and the fallout between Bill and Starclops. And, of course, we'll get to watch Violet grow up and gain her own powers.

Oh, and for my fellow _Star vs the Forces of Evil_ fans, we will be meeting Glossaryck.

BECAUSE ONE SIX-FINGERED WEIRDO ISN'T ENOUGH, RIGHT?

I know sarcasm when I hear it, Bill!

WELL, YOU USE IT OFTEN ENOUGH, SO YOU SHOULD.

 **Conclusion.**

A lot's gonna be happening in this trilogy. There will be filler episodes, there will be important episodes, there will be just regular chapters. One thing's for certain: you don't wanna miss this.

WELL, THAT ABOUT WRAPS THIS SEASON UP IN A NICE LITTLE BOW.

That it does. See you all in Season Two.

TWO LAST THINGS. ONE: DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW. AND, TWO: IVZORGB'H ZM ROOFHRLM, GSV FMREVIHV RH Z SLOLTIZN, YFB TLOW, YBBBBBBBBVVVVVVV!

Bonus Fact: Whenever I get an idea I don't wanna lose, I write it on a sticky note and stick it on my bedroom wall.

...SERIOUSLY?

Seriously.


End file.
